


Seeing The Stars From The Ground

by FlyRobinFly, Thorki_And_Other_Obsessions



Series: Stars Dance [1]
Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Babies, Boys In Love, Budding Love, Cute, Domestic Fluff, Flirting, Friends to Lovers, Galactic Standard Time, Getting Together, Grief, Implied Mpreg, Implied Sexual Content, Kes meets Finn, Kinda, Loss, M/M, Marriage Proposal, Medications, One Year Later..., Poe is a Near-Human, Poe is an Uncle, Poe takes Finn home, Post-Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Post-War, Slow Burn, Slow Romance, Step-siblings, Vomiting, Yavin 4, poe is a mess, settling down, sick
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-19
Updated: 2020-10-21
Packaged: 2021-03-06 04:42:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 15
Words: 53,913
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25963810
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FlyRobinFly/pseuds/FlyRobinFly, https://archiveofourown.org/users/Thorki_And_Other_Obsessions/pseuds/Thorki_And_Other_Obsessions
Summary: The Generals are long overdue for some time to themselves and with each other so Poe takes Finn home to Yavin IV. Finn and Poe have always been close. They've always had a special bond that felt like more than friendship but in war there was no time for love. With the War over now... what would become of them?
Relationships: BB-8 & Finn, BB-8 & Poe Dameron, BB-8 & Poe Dameron & Finn, Kes Dameron & Finn, Kes Dameron & Poe Dameron, Poe Dameron & Finn, Poe Dameron/Finn
Series: Stars Dance [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1887052
Comments: 110
Kudos: 117





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I use the Galactic Standard Calander for time measurement in this fic. It's not that important if you don't care. But if you do or are interested here is a quick guide:
> 
> 60 seconds = 1 minute  
> 60 minutes = 1 hour  
> 24 hours = 1 day  
> 5 days = 1 week: Primeday, Centaxday, Taungsday, Zhellday, Benduday  
> 7 weeks = 35 days = 1 month  
> 10 months + 3 festival weeks + 3 holidays = 368 days = 1 year

_**One year after the war ended…** _

  
  
  


The Resistance was hanging on by a thread. As the New Republic Military gained strength again, Resistance fighters left. Some left to join the Navy, others went home to be with their families. The Generals would be the last ones to leave Ajan Kloss. They made sure every last member of the Resistance had somewhere to go and went there safely.

Finn and Poe waited in silence until the blip on the datapad left the system. It was the last ship of Resistance fighters. Once the blinking stopped, they both exhaled. “Well… what’s next?” Finn asked, leaning forward with his elbows propped on his knees. He looked at Poe expectantly with lingering tiredness in his eyes, two years’ worth of exhaustion. “What happens to this place?”

Poe looked at the cave around them: empty. All that was left were a few crates of supplies, the chairs they were sitting in, and Poe’s X-Wing. Pretty soon, it will be a shell of a place. “It’ll probably become a hot spot for tourists,” he remarked. His words were strangled a little by the way he rested his chin on the back of his own chair. He had that same exhaustion in his eyes that Finn did, only his was probably two times as many years’ worth.

Finn furrowed his brows. “Huh?”

Poe sucked in a deep breath as he sat up straight and stretched tiredly. “That’s what happened to the Rebel Base on Yavin IV. After the Rebellion was disbanded, travelers would come to Yavin just to see the remains of a Rebel Base in the Massassi Temples.” Poe let out a yawn before resting forward against the back of his seat. “I should take you to see it sometime. It’s really beautiful.”

“It sounds beautiful,” Finn responded. Poe talked about his home a lot. On sleepless nights in their tent, Poe would describe in detail the wondrous moon he grew up on.

He told Finn about the Stintarils and Piranha Beetles that invaded the Dameron Homestead every few standard months, scaring away the whisper birds and harassing the wild Runyips. He compared the Monkey Lizards he passionately hated to the Woolamander apes back home that terrorized him when he was younger. Poe described the Yavin tides, the sunsets, and the complicated orbital patterns that made dark nights and bright days a scarcity.

As complicated as Poe made his home seem, the truly remarkable beauty of it couldn’t be overlooked. Finn always wondered what the Massassi trees looked like in person. Poe told him they had purple bark. And bioluminescent orchids and grenade mushrooms always grew at its base. Poe told Finn that Yavin IV was similar to Ajan Kloss with its invasive green overgrowth. But Ajan Kloss sounded bland compared to the fourth moon of Yavin. There were no ancient temples or bizarre wildlife or bioluminescent plants.

“I should take you to see them,” Poe said. Finn had been twiddling his thumbs in thought as he dreamt about what Yavin IV would be like but he stopped when Poe spoke. It almost felt wrong because they were the Generals… well… they were… Poe shrugged. “I’ll go with you to drop the remaining supplies on Ithor and then we’ll head back to Yavin. It’s not like we have anything to come back to. We’re all that’s left of the Resistance. You, me, and these two droids.” Poe gestured to BB-8 and D-O, both of which were silently standing by.

It took a while for them to figure out who would take which droids. They collectively decided that 3PO and R2 were better together and Chewy convinced Rey to take them with them on their Jedi adventure around the Galaxy. She was off saving worlds without Finn and Poe, leaving the Co-Generals to clean up the mess that the Resistance made with BB-8 and D-O. While D-O was a bit shy and reluctant to trust most sentients, the droid seemed comfortable with Rey’s friends and even seemed fond of Finn.

The droid looked between Finn and Poe. “E-e-empty cave.” It rolled back and forth expressively. “Ge-e-enerals of what ar-army, sir?”

Poe pursed his lips. “Ooo. Ouch.” Finn laughed and BB-8 warbled and chattered in response. Poe huffed. “Oh. So we lead the battle that defeated an entire fleet of Star Destroyers and saved the galaxy from the First Order and suddenly because there’s no army of Resistance fighters following our orders, we’re not worthy of the title?”

“He has a point, Poe,” Finn said sheepishly. “We can’t exactly be Generals anymore if there’s no one to give orders.” BB-8 beeped in tones of agreement which only seemed to bum Poe out a little bit. Finn seemed to notice the sadness in Poe’s eyes. “Hey, we’ve still got to deliver these supplies to Ithor. One last mission as Generals?”

Poe sighed and shook his head. “No, Pal. You’ll always be General to me,” he said looking at Finn sincerely. As Poe and Finn stared at each other for a moment, they took in the sentiment of Poe’s words.

“Swe-we-we-weet,” D-O said.

Finn smiled and leaned forward, patting Poe’s knee. “You too, Poe.” Poe put his hand on Finn’s and they sat like that for a moment, just looking into each other’s eyes and being in the moment… appreciating each other and what they’ve been through together.

The BB-8 let out a sultry whistle that ruined the moment. Poe snapped his head over at the droid. “Beebee,” he scolded.

Finn laughed when the droid talked back at his master sassily. But when he could see that Poe was getting worked up, getting ready to sass back, he abruptly stood and pulled on Poe’s hand. “Come on. Let’s go to bed.”

“But-” Poe protested, gesturing to BB-8.

“Come on,” Finn said more insistently. He tugged at Poe’s hand and dragged him towards the cave entrance where, just outside, their tent was waiting for them.

“Ok, _General_ ,” Poe muttered under his breath as he was dragged out of the cave. They got ready for bed pretty quickly, crashing on their cots as quickly as any other night after a long day of work. Poe yawned as Finn settled into bed. “I’ll com my dad in the morning and tell him we’ll be there in around forty-eight hours.”

“Ok,” Finn said, making the final adjustments to his bed before sighing heavily. “Night, Poe.”

“Night, Buddy.”

* * *

  
The next morning, Finn and Poe loaded up the small freighter Maz Catana had acquired for them with Poe’s X-Wing and the last of the supplies that they were returning to the people of Ithor. The freighter was just big enough for that. From Ajan Kloss to Ithor, they indulge in whatever rations were left, seeing as soon they would be eating real meals from the Dameron kitchen.

They played a game of Sabacc with BB-8 and D-O. Lando and Poe had made it a point to teach Finn in the last year. Finn was a natural at it but BB-8 and D-O, especially D-O, did not seem to understand the game at all. Finn and Poe found things to occupy their time until they arrived on Ithor.

Finn scolded Poe a lot on Ithor because he wasn’t very patient with the Ithorians. To be fair, Finn and Poe agreed to stay for a meal but no matter how much Poe insisted that meat did not agree with him, they kept insisting that he try the roast. Finn tried to cover for him, delighted to try the new cuisine.

Poe wasn’t lying when he said meat didn’t agree with him. The last time Poe accidentally ate something with animal proteins in it, it ended up all over Finn’s boots a few minutes later. That is a moment Finn will never forget, nor let Poe forget. Lucky for both of them, Poe won’t owe Finn another pair of boots this time.

They only spend a couple of hours on Ithor before setting out for their final destination, Yavin IV.

“I’m kinda surprised you didn’t run off with Rey,” Poe said, leaning back in the pilot’s seat. “Figured you’d rather go on a Jedi adventure than close up shop on our end.”

“I had to see it through to the end,” Finn replied earnestly. He was sitting in the copilot’s seat, a few feet from Poe. His feet were propped up on the console of the ship casually. “Besides, you were offered a pretty fancy job in the Navy, _Commander_ Dameron. You’d command what’s left of your old Squadron, get your own X-Wing, a large paycheck and everything. I didn’t see you running off just for your next adventure. Why would I?”

Poe shrugged. “I don’t know. Thought you would want some Jedi training to help you figure out your…” Poe made a gesture to the temple of his head. “...feelings.” After the Battle of Exegol, Finn and Poe argued about Finn’s ‘feelings’ for a while. Finn wasn’t really ready to admit they had something to do with the Force but Poe just wanted him to spit it out and be honest with him. They only ever talked about it once Finn realized his connection to the force was more like Leia’s than it was like Rey’s. The pressure seemed to ease a little bit at that realization.

“I don’t want to be a Jedi,” Finn told Poe. “Besides, what would an adventure with Rey be without you there to argue with her the entire time?”

“Oh. I don’t know. Probably a lot like your first adventure with Rey,” Poe said. Though it was awfully close to mumble. He sighed melodramatically. “Wearing my clothes, using my droid, I was forgotten - dead.”

“I didn’t forget you, Poe.”

“But you did think I was dead.”

“I had no reason to believe you were alive.”

“Sure you di-”

“Doesn’t matter,” Finn interrupted, putting a hand up to stop him before Poe turned this into a thing. “Look at us now. We’re both alive. Somehow we made it from ‘I need a pilot’ to ‘I need you in command with me’ in two years’ time.”

“I feel like I’ve known you for longer than that,” Poe admitted. He pushed back with his feet, beginning to rock in his seat.

“Me too,” Finn said thoughtfully. He licked his lips as he watched Poe swaying back and forth in his chair in a rocking motion. Poe. The Pilot. He belonged in a cockpit. He belonged to the stars. “Why didn’t you take the job?”

Poe pursed his lip, biting the side of his cheek as he sighed. He gave a half shrug. “I don’t know… I guess I don’t want to take orders anymore.” Poe looked at Finn but he could see in Finn’s eyes that he knew there was more to it. “Gotta be honest. I’m not a huge fan of the Republic, not after the way they didn’t respond to the First Order even after I brought their attention to it. Not a fan of the bureaucracy either. I only want to fight for what I believe in, not what I’m told to fight for.”

“Hm,” Finn held back a smile at how Poe’s response made him feel. He was glad to see that Poe found his freedom to fight for what he believed more valuable than his next mission. “That’s a good reason.”

“Yeah. I was bound to have one sooner or later,” Poe joked. “Anyways… I guess, for now, I’ll just go home.”

“For now?”

“That’s all I can say for right now. I don’t know if I’m ready to officially retire just yet,” Poe admitted with a heavy heart. “I always imagined I would die out there in the stars, the way my friends did. Never really saw myself settling down either…” Poe’s hand subconsciously reached for the necklace that dangled over his chest every day: his mother’s wedding ring. She never died among the stars, the way pilots hope to.

“You’re tired,” Finn told him. “You’ve been fighting for a long time. Even the best fighters have to take a break every now and then and you sure as hell deserve one.”

“Yeah…” Poe agreed absentmindedly, trying to pull his thoughts away from his mother. “I don’t want to miss out on any of the fun though.”

“Yeah. Just think about all the fun Rey is having with Chewie and all those porgs,” Finn said, trying to lighten the mood. He knew how Poe felt about the porgs.

“I hate porgs. And Chewie cheats as Dejarik. We both know it,” Poe claimed and Finn laughed.

“Come on. What about Wookie hugs?”

“He threw out my back last time!” Poe said, tone bordering on a whine.

Finn had to give him that. The Wookie could be a little unaware of his sheer strength sometimes. But he had a gentle heart. As long as you didn’t beat him at Dejarik. “Oh but 3PO and R2 are there too,” Finn offered.

“I can’t stand 3PO too,” Poe said. “And R2 is a bad influence on BB-8.”

Finn huffed and shook his head in annoyance. “You do need a break. All this work has turned you into a grumpy, old man.” Finn snapped his finger and pointed at Poe. “You know who you’re reminding me of?”

Poe knows what’s coming. It’s not the first time someone has made the connection. “Oh, come on, Finn. Don-”

“Han!”

“Ugh.” Poe rolled his eyes. “Here we go.”

“You have a lot in common.”

“No we don’t,” Poe said.

“BB-8 is your Chewie,” Finn pointed out. BB-8 beeped in denial from his spot behind Poe where he had sat silently for a while. “What am I, then? Your Luke? Weren’t Luke and Han best friends?”

Poe furrowed his brows, giving Finn a look of annoyance. “You’re not Luke.”

“You’re right. You’re right. All-powerful Jedi. That’s obviously Rey,” Finn said. “I guess that makes me-”

“You’re Finn,” Poe said. “You’re not Luke. You’re not Leia. You’re Finn. Just Finn. I would know. I was the one who gave that name to you.”

Finn watched Poe fondly with a smile. “Yeah. You did. It was the best gift anyone ever gave me. You made me human.”

Poe seemed to soften at the sentiment. He didn’t smile, but he still looked at Finn sincerely. “It was nothing, Pal. You deserved a chance to be an actual person… and look at you,” he said smiling and gesturing to him. “You made the best of it. You’re a good man, Finn,” Poe reminded him as if he hadn’t already said it enough. Every chance Poe got, he always made sure Finn knew he was good despite his past.

“You too, Poe,” Finn said. Only a good man would’ve taken a chance with a Stormtrooper the way Poe did. Only a good man would’ve welcomed his enemy with open arms, sharing his clothes, his friends, and his warmth so generously. Finn remembered how out of place he felt in the Resistance at first. Poe always made him feel like he belonged there. And now Poe was taking him to the moon that he called ‘home’. Only a good man would do that.

* * *

  
Yavin was colossal.

The large red, orange orb was so massive that it was frightening upon first glance. The clouds of the planet weren’t completely homogeneous, creating subtle streaks and patches of storms. The gradient of lighter and darker reds gave the illusion of depth. One would almost miss the small, green moon if they weren’t looking for it.

“It’s so green,” Finn said as they approached the atmosphere of the planet.

“It sure is,” Poe said smiling eagerly at his home.

Finn sat in silence, taking in the view. He studied the terrain. There were no large oceans by the looks of it. There were no mountains either, none that were substantial anyways. There were just patches of green and grey around the whole rock. On the side of the moon that wasn’t lit by the system’s sun, he could see lights. Finn pointed. “Are those from cities?”

Poe shook his head. “Nope. That’s the forest.” Finn had wondered if that was the case. Poe had told him that nights were never really that dark on Yavin IV. There was always a red glow from the gas giant that the moon orbited and the forests were filled with bioluminescence that was bright enough in some places to see from space.

Finn smiled and turned to Poe. “Your descriptions didn’t do it justice, Poe Dameron.”

“Some things can only speak for themselves.” Poe brought the ship into the atmosphere and steadily lowered it. He had to keep reminding himself that he wasn’t in a hurry, just anxious to finally be home after two years. He knew he should have visited during that time. Especially during the last year when the war was over. But he had a feeling that returning to his post in the Resistance would be too difficult if he did. So he promised himself he’d wait until it was all over.

As a familiar patch of land came into view, Poe smiled. There were perfectly aligned rows of trees, acres of them. He could already smell the fresh koyos. He could almost taste them. Now that was a food his stomach would love to be reacquainted with.

A few acres past the property line of the ranch, a large metal hangar came into view. That’s where Kes kept Shara’s A-Wing and where Poe would keep his X-Wing. It was also used as a fruit warehouse during harvest times to keep the Koyos ripe and fresh.

Just past the hangar, were two identical metal houses perpendicular to each other. By the looks of it, they were manufactured. It was clear that over the years, they’d been individualized as they aged. They each had unique signs of wear from enduring years of weather. Both were covered in climbing ferns and other greenery. Finn wondered if any of them were bioluminescent.

Poe lowered the freighter into the open space between the houses and the hangar. BB-8 was already chomping-at-the-bit excited and impatient to get off the ship. Poe took a deep breath and smiled. “Home sweet home.”


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for checking out chapter 2! I hope you'll enjoy it.

BB-8 was the first one down the loading ramp of the freighter. Finn stopped at the bottom, waiting for Poe. It felt weird entering Poe’s home first. So he waited while Poe powered down the ship. A short distance in front of him, BB-8 was enthusiastically greeting an older man, who looked an awful lot like Poe. In fact, Finn felt like he was looking into the future for a moment. He looked like Poe, a bit thinner and more aged. But he looked like Poe.

“Hey, Sarge!” Poe called out as he barreled past Finn and towards the man.

The man looked up from BB-8 and grinned, a big toothy smile. “My boy. Come here!” He stood and closed the distance between him and Poe, wrapping his son up in a tight, warm hug. Poe’s arms flung around his shoulders as he greeted his father and held him for the first time in… way too long. He laughed joyfully as his father spun him around. “Oh, boy? What am I talking about?” He set Poe down to look at his face. “You’re a man now.”

Poe rolled his eyes. “Come on, Dad.”

“General of the Resistance,” he tested out the words. “My son, a general?” The man laughed jovially and fondled at Poe’s face. Poe batted at his dad’s hands in annoyance. “Oh, look at you. You’re so old. Last I saw you, you were still just a boy.”

Finn slowly approached, listening as Poe’s father fawned over his prodigal son returning home. The idea of Poe having a father was so foreign to Finn. He didn’t really know much of anything about what family was like. The only family he knew was the Resistance.

Poe’s father gasped. “Oh no. Is that a grey hair? Wow, you’re getting lots of them.”

“You’ve seen me in plenty of holocoms, Dad. I don't know why you’re so surprised.”

“Well, it’s kinda hard to tell in a holo. It could be the lighting.” It was at this point that Poe and his father seemed to notice Finn approaching, D-O timidly following. “Ah. And this must be the Co-General I’ve heard so much about?”

“Dad, this is Finn,” Poe said, gesturing to Finn. “Finn, this is my father, Kes.”

Finn offered a hand, even opened his mouth to say… something. But before he could, Kes was wrapping him in a hug. “Oh-”

“Thanks for having his back, kid,” Kes told Finn as he hugged him. So that’s where Poe gets it.

Finn laughed silently before hugging Kes back. “It’s good to meet you, Mr. Dameron.”

“Mr. Dameron was my father,” Kes pulled back, holding onto Finn’s shoulders. “Call me Kes. Just Kes.”

“Kes,” Finn corrected himself with a nod.

“Who’s this little guy?” Kes asked, gesturing to D-O who was still hiding behind Finn.

“Oh, that’s D-O,” Poe replied. “It takes him a little while to warm up to new people.”

“O-o-old General-al Damer-eron,” D-O said looking Kes up and down.

“And he has a stutter,” Poe said.

“He’s cute. I am General Dameron’s father,” Kes introduced himself. “You can call me Kes.”

“Fa-father Kes,” D-O declared.

“That’ll have to do.” Kes turned his attention back to Finn and Poe. “So are you guys hungry? Finn, what kind of foods do you like? You’re not as picky as Poe, are you?”

“I’ll eat anything,” Finn replied.

“It’s true. He’s basically a human trash compactor. He’s always hungry and he’ll eat just about anything including some things that aren’t food,” Poe confirmed Finn’s statement. Finn gave him a look. If they were alone, Finn would probably be arguing why Poe’s anecdote was false but he didn’t want to do that in front of Poe’s father. Especially so soon.

“Well, then he should be happy enough around here. Plenty of new foods to try. And fresh from the garden too,” Kes said enthusiastically.

“Are you vegetarian like Poe?” Finn asked.

“Oh no. I’ll eat meat. But Poe refused to eat meat when he was a kid so I had to get used to cooking without so much of it.” Finn thought it was interesting how Kes worded that. He said that Poe refused to eat meat like it was a choice and maybe it hadn’t actually made him sick. He’d have to ask Poe about that later. “Come on,” said Kes waving them to follow him around the back of the house. “Let’s figure out what we want for dinner.”

Kes enthusiastically showed Finn and Poe his flourishing vegetable garden. Poe kept handing vegetables for him to try right out of the garden. He knew how to make Finn happy. Finn didn’t have to say much and Kes and Poe talked. He was busy tasting everything he was given. It all tasted good to Finn. When Poe or Kes would ask him what he thought, his response was usually, “Mmm. That one is good” or something along those lines. 

Finn never noticed the way Poe was watching him fondly the entire time. But Kes sure did. It started with Kes offering Finn a tomato. Finn got the juice on his fingers and had to lick them off. He hummed in pleasure at the juiciness and flavor of the tomato. After that, Poe offered Finn vegetable after vegetable, peppers and peas and green beans and carrots, just so he could see the delight it brought Finn. Kes noticed this.

Poe picked a small, ripe lemon cucumber and wiped off all the dirt and pricklies. He gave it to Finn and watched fondly as Finn stared at it curiously. “Do I just… bite into it or-”

“Yeah.”

“The whole thing?”

“All of it.” Finn bit into the cucumber with a crisp crunch. Poe beamed at the way Finn hummed delightfully. When his dad was suspiciously quiet for a moment, he looked over at him. Uh oh. Kes had that look. He was sure Kes had already been suspicious with the way Poe talked about Finn. Figures he’d be able to confirm them just by seeing the two of them together in person. Kes would want to talk about it sooner or later.

Kes cleared his throat. “So what do you want to eat?”

Poe put an arm around his dad’s shoulder and headed towards the house. “How about the stir fry you used to make?”

“The one with the eggs in it?” Kes asked.

“Uh. No. I don’t think I can eat eggs anymore,” Poe said apologetically. “Just… the one with the rice and all the vegetables. Any of them sound great to me. I’ve been eating nothing but food pellets, nuts, and wild berries from Ajan Kloss for the last few months.”

Kes didn’t seem to be concerned about Poe saying he couldn’t eat eggs anymore. But perhaps he was filing that information away for later when they had time alone to talk. “What about you, Finn? That sound ok?” Kes asked, looking back at Finn before he approached the stairs to the back door.

“Vegetables? Out of  _ your  _ garden? Yes, please, Mr. Dameron,” Finn said, following them up the stairs.

Poe opened the door for Finn and let him go in first, BB-8 and D-O following him. Kes moved to enter the house but leaned in close to say quietly to Poe, “I like this one.” Poe kicked his dad’s shoe, urging him into the house, not commenting. But he thought to himself, “Me too, Dad. Me too.”

As soon as Poe entered the house, he was greeted by two old familiars. “Hey, Maury,” Poe greeted the MR-9 household cleaning droid. He looked similar to R2 in structure and design. His father had gotten it after his mother died to help keep up around the house. And to keep Poe company. Maury was Poe’s first little droid friend. Poe crouched down to greet him, giving his dome a scratch. “Been keepin’ up with the Sarge, I see.”

“Master Poe. It has been a lengthy amount of time since your last visit,” another droid greeted. This droid was different - two legs and two arms, resembling a human. The voice was husky, yet feminine. A JZ-5Z model, JayZee, that Poe’s uncle L’ulo had brought to live with him in the other house back in the day. “How has the harsh galaxy treated you in your leave?”

“I’m quite fine, JayZee,” Poe replied. “Thank you for asking.”

JayZee turned from Poe to Finn robotically and examined him. “Hm. A rather fine specimen you have brought home, Master Poe. He shall make a fine mate. And look. You have brought home children,” JayZee said, bending down slightly to admire BB-8 and D-O. “Oh, Master Kes must be so happy-”

“Whoa whoa whoa, JayZee,” Poe interrupted, after noticing the way Finn’s eyebrows shot up to his hairline of where his braids started. Poe had taken to braiding hair as a hobby years ago. Finn eventually caved and let Poe get a hold of those locks. “You’ve got this all wrong. Finn is not a mate, ok? He’s my friend. And BB-8 and D-O are my friends too.”

JayZee stood up straight, looking at Poe and at Finn and back at Poe before finally looking to Kes. “Your son is thirty-five years old and has not found a mate. I am sorry to report that, at this rate, you will never be a grandfather, Master Kes.”

“I haven’t given up hope yet, Jay,” Kes replied, seemingly unbothered by the droid’s disappointing calculations as he walked towards the kitchen. He opened the conservator door and began pulling out vegetables and setting them on the counter. “Poe, why don’t you show Finn around and get settled while I get dinner started?”

“Sure you don’t want help?” Poe asked, walking into the kitchen.

“Poe,” Kes chided.

“Ok! Ok,” he agreed, walking back towards the front door where a hallway was that led to a few other rooms. “Come on, Finn. I’ll show you around.” The hall was very short. In the middle of the hall, on the same side of the house as the kitchen, there was a refresher. On the other side of the hall, there were three doors, which had stairs leading down to them as this section of the house was lower than the rest. Poe pointed to the one closest to the entry they came in. “That used to be my room. Now it’s technically a guest room. We’ll stay in there.” He pointed to the next door. “Linen room.” And the next door. “Dad’s room.” Poe pulled Finn towards the other end of the hall where another door to the outside was and an opening back into the living and dining area and the kitchen. “It’s kinda hard to get lost.”

Poe was right. The layout of the home was pretty open-concept and simple. The kitchen, living, and dining areas were well lit from the vast windows and glass doors. The walls seemed to have been painted recently with a light blue powder coat. Finn half expected the inside to be just like metal and cold looking as it appeared on the outside. But inside, there was a medium brown wooden floor that brought the place to life. There were hanging plants in almost every corner and there were unique pieces of furniture that almost looked like they were handmade.

The table in the dining area was made of a large slab of dark wood. Finn ran his finger along the rough edge of it, noticing a purplish colored bark under the thick coat of sealant. “My grandfather made it,” Poe told Finn. “It’s Massassi.”

Finn smiled. “It’s quite impressive,” Finn rested his hand on the back of one of the chairs at the head of the table. The chairs shared the same elements like the table. Dark wood with shades of iridescent purple mixed in. Metal legs held them up off the ground. Along the sides of the table were corresponding benches, metal holding up Massassi. “Did he make the seats too?”

“Actually, Dad and I made them about ten years ago,” Poe explained. “That was after the whole… spice running thing. But before I joined the Navy. I took a break to work some things out.” Poe bit his lower lip and patted the back of the chair thoughtfully. “Yep. These mark a major turning point in my relationship with my dad.”

“Really?”

“Yeah. We spent ten years hating each other until we buckled down and actually talked about our problems. Ever since we’ve been in a really good place,” Poe reminisced.

“That’s good,” Finn said. He wondered what could have driven a father and son to hate each other for so long. His understanding was the family was supposed to love each other no matter what. Then again, what could a stormtrooper really know about family? “You have a nice home, Poe,” Finn told Poe.

Poe smiled in response before he snapped his finger and pointed at Finn, making the younger man raised an eyebrow curiously. “Wait until you sleep in a real bed.” Finn just laughed in response. “I’m serious. No bunk or cot could hold a glowrod to a real mattress. Finn, my friend, you are going to sleep like a baby tonight.”

“I don’t know. I’ve slept in some pretty nice bunks in my day,” Finn said. Though, really, all the First Order bunks were the same and half his time with the Resistance he spent sleeping on floors or in weird little nooks and crannies on the  _ falcon _ . He had a hard time picturing a bed more comfortable than one of the bunks on the falcon.

“I seriously doubt that,” Poe said. “You’re never going to want to leave.”

“Well, then. I guess you’re stuck with me,” Finn said with a bit of a smirk.

“Hey, Pal. As far as I’m concerned, you’re right where you belong,” Poe said, giving Finn a casual poke in the side. He smiled and stepped closer to Finn to fix the collar of his shirt. There wasn’t really even anything wrong with it. It was probably just an excuse for Poe to move closer and touch him.

Poe hadn’t expected Finn to respond to the touch by resting a hand on his hip. “You sound pretty sure about that, flyboy,” Finn said, looking down and into Poe’s eyes. Up close, their minor height difference was actually noticeable. So was the way Poe glanced at Finn’s lips.

“I haven’t been wrong about it before,” Poe supplied. All the times he told Finn he had a place in the Resistance, that he was where he belonged, he never thought he’d be saying that there, in his own home. But he was sure glad he got to. “You can stay as long as you want.”

They stood there like that for a good minute, Finn’s hand on Poe’s waist, Poe’s hands still on Finn’s chest. Poe’s hands were still on Finn’s chest, Finn’s big, muscly chest. Poe inhaled sharply as he slid his hands down and away from Finn. “Let’s - uh - let’s go get our bags.” Poe abruptly pulled away from Finn and headed towards the door closest to them, not the one they’d come in through earlier. Finn followed.

Just before Poe exited he stopped and called back to his father. “Hey, Dad. Where can I park the freighter?!”

“You can leave it in the hangar,” Kes said, looking back from the counter he was chopping vegetables on with a shrug.

“Yeah. I think I’m gonna park my X-Wing in there and work on it. Don’t think there’s that much room though,” Poe replied.

Kes nodded and scraped some scraps into the bin, getting some on the floor. “Op.” He whistled and tapped his foot. “Maury!” The droid was quick to respond, racing to vacuum up the vegetable scraps. While the droid cleaned up after him, he turned to Poe again. “You can park it in the east field, I suppose. Unless you’re worried about flooding. Then you can park it on the north hill. But the woolamanders are migrating through there right about now.” He turned and patted the droid on its dome. “Good droid.”

Poe sighed. “East field it is then.” Poe finally left the house, walking down the steps and towards the ship with Finn. He had Finn help him back his X-Wing out of the freighter and parked it in the hangar. Then, they retrieved their things. They each had a satchel and a jacket, and Finn had a spare pair of boots. Poe looked at the clouds and put on his jacket before he gave Finn his satchel to take inside while he parked the freighter in the east field. It would be pouring down rain by the time Poe made it back to the house for dinner.

* * *

Finn walked into the room Poe had said they’d be staying in earlier, a satchel over each shoulder and a jacket and pair of boots occupying the other. It was pretty dark. There weren’t really any windows which he found kind of odd considering how open the rest of the house had been. He found the light switch and turned on the light. There was a large bed, made neatly with a plush blanket draped over the end. He’d never seen anything like it before. It looked like some sort of foreign luxury.

Finn set down the bags on a cushioned bench in the far right corner of the room. This room was painted a similar blue to the area of the house but the paint was old and worn. There were scratches and stains that he was sure had stories behind them, especially if this had been Poe’s room. Speaking of, Finn couldn’t find very much evidence that it had ever been Poe’s room other than the scratches and stains.

There were three doors in the room - the one he came in that led up to the main area of the house, a door on the right wall of that which Finn assumed led to the outside, and a door to the left that Finn assumed was a closet or something. The doors were all slate grey and made the room seem more closed in. It almost felt like a room on a ship with no windows.

Finn started when all of a sudden, the door and parts of the right wall slid down and disappeared into the wall itself. “Light Blocking panels.” Finn spun around to see Kes standing in the doorway, his hand on another switch, one Finn hadn’t noticed. There were actually a few switches he’d missed when he’d entered. He wondered what they were all for. “Sorry. I should’ve knocked.”

Finn let out a breath of relief. “It’s ok,” he said, turning to face that wall again. He could see outside now. Two transparisteel windows and a transparisteel door let into the beautiful sights of the Kes’s garden and a small mountain range close by. “You have a beautiful home, Mr. Dameron.”

“Thank you,” Kes said, striding slowly until he stood next to Finn, looking out at the view with him. “Sometimes the beauty can be distracting when you’re trying to sleep. That’s what I installed those panels for.”

“Makes sense,” Finn said. “Poe told me about the complicated orbital sequence and how sometimes the light makes it hard to sleep.”

Kes nodded. Finn couldn’t help but look at him and see the Poe in him. The eyebrows, the nose, the eyes. The actual structure of his face was different, more rounded, and softened. Poe must get his well-chiseled facial features from his mom. “Poe went to the east field?”

That seemed to pull Finn out of his little thought train. “Mhm.” He nodded.

“Hope he brought a jacket,” he mumbled before straightening up a bit and turning towards the door a little. “Dinner is ready if you want to come eat. We don’t need to wait for Poe as long as we save him some food. The east field is a bit of a walk.” He smiled and put a hand on Finn’s shoulder, gently urging him towards the exit. “Let’s get to know each other, Finn.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you enjoyed chapter 2! I would love to see hear some feedback. Let me know if I forgot any tags. Thanks for reading, Commenting, and leaving kudos! Makes my day knowing someone is checking out what I put out there.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for coming back and checking out chapter 3!
> 
> I'd like to take the opportunity to thank my beta-reader @Thorki_And_Other_Obsessions! They read each chapter over for grammar mistakes and have been a sounding board for this work. Love you!

Finn and Kes sat at that beautiful Massassi wood table with their plates full of a veggie and rice stir fry. Finn took one bite and decided that he was never going to leave this place. The people were friendly. The views were stunning. The beds had real mattresses and plush blankets. And the food was good. The food was great. The food was-! “Wow.”

“How is it?” Kes asked, noting the way Finn was silent as he chewed his first bite.

Finn was only silent because he could not find the words to say. “Oh, man.” Finn swallowed and pointed to the pile of food on his plate. “That is damn good.”

Kes laughed happily as Finn dug in, seeming to struggle to decide whether he wanted to shovel it into his mouth so fast he could hardly enjoy it fully or savor every bite so slowly that he’d be there all day. “I’m glad you like it so much.” Finn hummed in acknowledgment, his mouth still full. “So how has Poe been eating? It sounds like his stomach problems are just getting worse.”

Finn swallowed and took a drink of… something. He didn’t know what it was. But it was subtly fruity and tangy with a slightly bitter aftertaste. “To be honest, he hasn’t been eating too well this past year. I think it’s partly because of the stress and the war. The anxiety will make him not want to eat. But there’s also the fact that so many things make him sick.”

“It used to just be meat,” Kes said. “When he was a little kid, we told him where meat came from and he refused to eat it. There were a few times he accidentally ate meat and was just fine but then when he was about fifteen he started to get sick from it. He could still have other animal products like milk and cheese and broth. When he returned home about ten years ago, he started having problems with stuff like that. Now he’s saying he can’t have eggs?”

Finn could see the concern for Poe in Kes’s eyes. “I’m worried about him too. I didn’t fully realize it wasn’t always like that for him and that it was getting worse.”

“Did he ever see a doctor?” Kes asked.

“I… don’t really know. We didn’t have a lot of medical staff around and Poe is… well, you know how Poe is,” Finn said. “He’d rather treat the symptom than solve the actual problem that is causing the symptom.”

“Maybe we can put our heads together then,” Kes offered. “Get to the bottom of it and get him feeling better.”

“I think being home will help a lot with that,” Finn said, taking another drink. “Anything to keep him from throwing up on me again.”

Kes was mid-chew when Finn said that last part. He nearly choked. “I’m sorry. He what?”

Finn shook his head and prepared a bite on his spoon. “He threw up on my boots one time.” He shoveled the full spoon into his mouth, not fully aware of how talking about vomit during a meal could be unappealing to someone else. Finn was still learning stuff like that. 

Kes started laughing as he chewed his food which made Finn look at him like he was crazy. After Kes swallowed, he asked, “Why did he throw up on you? Was he drunk?”

“No. Someone gave him a protein bar that he didn’t realize had egg in it. A few minutes later, we were just standing there talking to someone and he realized he was about to be sick so he turned around and I was right there.” Kes continued to laugh which made Finn happy he was able to entertain Kes even without Poe present. Finn shrugged. “It’s ok. He got me some new boots,” Finn said to which Kes laughed some more. It wasn’t a loud bellowing laugh. It was more of a lighthearted chuckle, a delighted one. It reminded Finn of Poe a little bit.

Speaking of Poe… the pilot barged in the front door, sopping wet. Finn hadn’t even noticed how much it was raining outside until Poe came in. “What’s so funny?” Poe asked, kicked off his wet boots, and shed his jacket to make his way over to the table to grab some food.

Poe walked right up to Finn, towering over him as Finn and Kes chuckled quietly, mostly Kes. “Nothing,” Finn said, keeping his face as plain as he could.

Poe stared down at him for a minute, his curly hair dripping with rainwater. He didn’t believe Finn for a minute. “Come on. You guys were totally talking about me.”

Finn scoffed, not able to hide his smile anymore. “So vain.” Poe stared into Finn’s eyes, squinting thoughtfully. It looked like he was thinking really hard. “What?” Finn asked.

“Hm.” Poe thoughtfully put a finger to his chin before he grinned and playfully declared, “You need a shower-”

Finn saw Poe leaning over him more and put his hands up in defense. “No.” Poe tried to hold Finn down in place but Finn grabbed Poe’s hands. “Poe! Nonono!” Poe shook his head, splattering Finn in the face with the rainwater from his hair. “Ah. Pft. Come on.”

Poe laughed, leaning against Finn’s resisting arms. “I got you again, Pal.”

“I saw it coming,” Finn said. He held Poe’s wrists in his hands, like binds keeping him an arm’s length away.

“Oh yeah? Then why didn’t you stop it-”

“Poe-”

“-if you saw it coming, General-”

“Poe!” Finn said, pulling Poe forward and down by his wrists. Poe looked happy, more relaxed than he had been in a long time. Usually, Poe’s demure side was reserved for Finn when they were alone in their tent or on a mission. Perhaps, he wasn’t afraid of showing his father just how childish he could be. “Go get your food,” Finn said firmly, yet there was still a hint of softness to it and a fond smile gracing his lips. Poe laughed as Finn released him. He walked back into the kitchen to wash up and grab his food. Finn wiped at the droplets of water on his face and made a face. “You’re just as bad as Chewie!” Finn called out to him.

Poe laughed some more as he washed his hands with soap and water. “Hey, I thought you said I was Han?”

“I did say that,” Finn mumbled under his breath as he shoveled around the food on his plate. Finn took a bite and used his sleeve to wipe at his face and around his neck. Then he noticed all the water that got on his actual shirt around the shoulders. “Poe, did you do this?” He was soaked.

“Hey. Sometimes having Poe is like having a pet animal,” Kes said as his son was coming to the table to sit with them. “I mean, he makes messes, gets water everywhere,-” Poe sat down. “-throws up on your boots-”

Poe’s eyes went wide. “Wha-” He looked at Finn. “You told him about that?!”

Finn shrugged, trying to be nonchalant. But he secretly loved the way Poe reacted to things sometimes. “It may have come up.”

“It did. And so did your protein bar,” Kes remarked. Finn and Kes laughed in unison but Poe was not amused. Finn and Kes didn’t mention it again and Poe was able to eat and enjoy his dinner, sending compliments to the chef. They helped clean up after dinner but they’d had a pretty long two days of traveling so Poe headed to the refresher to get ready for bed.

“You guys fine sharing a bed?” Kes asked Finn as the younger man stacked the leftovers in the conservator. “Poe could always take the couch. It’s pretty comfortable.”

“No, thanks. We’ll be fine. Our cots were pushed together on Ajan Kloss so we’re kind of used to being that close,” Finn assured Kes. Though he had no idea just how much that information would confirm Kes’s suspicion that something was blooming between the two of them. “Besides, Poe is looking forward to a real bed.”

Kes nodded. “I get it. It’s kinda hard to sleep by yourself after having been through what you guys have anyways. It helps to be close to someone,” Kes said. He understood that much and he was sure it was part of why Finn and Poe were pretty inseparable. But he also had a sneaking suspicion that there was more to it than either of them were willing to face yet. It gave Kes a warm and hopeful feeling inside. “I’ll see you guys when you wake up,” Kess said before leaving the house to go take care of things around the ranch in the slowly dimming light of Yavin’s fourth moon.

* * *

Poe hopped out of the fresher feeling cleaner than he had in months. There wasn’t much of a refresher on Ajan Kloss. It wasn’t very private either. So being able to take his time and not worry about anyone spotting him was a real treat. He put on a clean shirt he’d found in his closet and a pair of shorts before heading to his room.

Finn was sitting on the bench, barefooted and dazed, looking out the window at the sun setting over the mountains. Poe found that the way the light was hitting Finn almost made him look heavenly. It was a chore to peel his eyes away to find something from his closet for Finn to wear to bed. They were no strangers to sharing. Poe’s been sharing his clothes with Finn since the day they met. He shared his friends, his space, his bunk, his tent. Poe’s first act as general was to share his rank with Finn. He was basically sharing his life with Finn.

Poe walked over to Finn and handed him a small stack of clothes. Finn looked up at him curiously, wondering why Poe interrupted his sightseeing. Though as soon as he saw Poe his face softened. Poe was always a welcome sight. “I wasn’t kidding when I said you need a shower,” Poe said, unaware of how tired he sounded or looked. He tried to hide it a bit behind a small smile.

Finn took the clothes and smiled at Poe appreciatively. His eyes glanced down at the chain around his neck. Poe never did anything without it. “You need to go to sleep,” Finn told him.

Poe yawned and nodded at the same time. He looked around the room, furrowing his brows. “Where are BB-8 and D-O?” Poe finally asked after Finn stood up.

“I saw them follow your dad outside. I’m sure Beebee just wanted to show D-O around,” Finn assured Poe. Recently Poe had grown pretty attached to BB-8. He was always attached to BB-8 but he was still able to loan him out on occasion or separate from him but after Rey took him to Tatooine, Poe got… sad. Really sad. It was around the time that Poe pushed their cots together, frantically trying to make excuses that Finn never asked for. Finn understood. Poe had lost a lot around that time, Leia, one of his best friends. Not having BB-8 at his side must’ve made it even harder to bear. “I can go find them if you want me to,” Finn offered. He knew how much it would mean to Poe if he did.

Even just the offer made Poe’s heart flutter and warm up. His smile reached his eye and he rubbed Finn’s arm affectionately. “Thanks, buddy. But let’s just let them be. I’m sure they’ll enjoy being out there with my dad more than stuck in here with us.”

“You sure?”

Poe nodded. His hand was still affectionately rubbing Finn’s arm. At some point, it had turned to him feeling Finn’s arm, his bicep more specifically. Poe caught himself biting his lip and staring at said bicep for a moment. Who could blame him? Finn was a masterpiece and his arms were… Poe cleared his throat and dropped his hand. “I’m gonna get in bed.”

Finn pretended not to notice the way Poe was feeling him or looking at him. He wasn’t an idiot though. He knew what it meant. He thinks he always knew what those looks meant. It just seemed like they were finally at a place where they can do something about it. “I’m gonna get in the fresher.”

Poe walked over to the bed, flopping onto it face first. He let out a loud, almost sensual sounding moan. “Oh my stars, Finn.” He curled up and hugged a pillow. “Fiiiinn! It’s like heaven.” Finn watched as Poe wrestled with the bedding to get under it, grunting and finally letting out a pleased sigh once he was completely settled. Finn put a hand over his mouth to hide his smile. Poe heard his silence, opening one eye to peek over at him watching at the foot of the bed. “I thought you were going to the fresher.”

“I was,” Finn said, removing his hand. “But then you were all ‘Oh’.” Finn rolled his eyes in the back of his head as a mockery of Poe’s display of pleasure. He only saw Poe blush a little and wasn’t entirely satisfied. “‘Fiiiiinnn-oof’.” Finn received a pillow in the face and laughed, pleased when he saw Poe moving to hide his face in a pillow. He threw the pillow back at Poe before leaving to go get in the fresher.

When Finn finally did climb into bed with Poe after a long relaxing time in the fresher, Poe was already sound asleep. He would be disappointed he didn’t get to see Finn’s reaction to the real bed. But he would be even more disappointed to see that Finn hadn’t reacted much. He was just so comfortable and felt so safe and at home that he fell asleep almost instantly,

* * *

Finn slowly started to wake up. Blinking, he tried to remember where he was. That’s right. He was on Yavin IV with Poe and his dad and four of their droid friends. He was in the most comfortable bed he’d ever even seen. With Poe. Finn was with Poe. As long as he was with Poe, he knew he was where he was supposed to be.

Poe was right in front of him, asleep on his side and facing him. The curls of his hair were a mess, draping over his face, only leaving his mouth visible. His lips were all pursed and sleep swollen, slightly wet with drool.

Finn reached in front of him, touching Poe gently on the arm. Nothing happened. “Poe,” he said softly. He noticed Poe take in a deep breath which indicated that he was probably waking up. But he didn’t seem particularly ready to be awake yet. Finn brushed back some of Poe’s curls to see if his eyes would open. They didn’t.

“You want some more sleep?” Finn asked. Poe took a deep breath before stuffing his face in his pillow. “Ok,” Finn said, propping himself up on his elbow. “I’m gonna get up.” As soon as Finn started to move, an arm slung around his waist, holding him down. He looked to find Poe’s face still stuffed in his pillow but he was holding Finn down. “Poe…”

Poe let out a tired moan into his pillow to which Finn just slumped tiredly and huffed. Poe tightened his grip on Finn’s waist, shuffling closer to him. “Hold me,” he mumbled, already having his face stuffed in Finn’s chest and leaving the rest up to Finn.

It was a little too early for Finn to even find Poe’s demand as funny as he should’ve. Poe was never very subtle when it came to physical displays of affection or comfort. However, Finn was never able to tell Poe no. He enjoyed the comfort.

Finn pulled Poe tight to his chest, pressing a smile to his forehead. He could still see outside. They never shut the light-blocking panels. Maybe that was what woke him. He closed his eyes. Poe’s hair smelled nice. One of his curls tickled Finn’s nose every time he inhaled. Finn moved his hand from Poe’s back to the back of his head, running his fingers through Poe’s soft locks.

Finn found it was fitting that Poe came from such a beautiful place. He was wild like the creatures that roamed its forests. He was unique, like the massassi tree bark and their purplish moss. His skin often glowed with a sheen of oil or sweat like the Yavin sun. His limbs were like the jungle - his arms wrapping around Finn like vines, his legs snaking around Finn’s like the roots of the trees encroaching invisibly.

They could stay like this forever, wrapped up in each other and unaware of the world around them. Breathing in each other’s scents. All while half asleep. Relaxed. Safe.

Who knows how long they stayed like that for. They probably fell asleep again. Or at least half asleep. They didn’t hear Poe’s father coming until he barged in, turning on the light. “Hey, are you guys ever going to wake up?”

Poe grumbled as he pulled apart from Finn. “Dad,” he groaned.

“You’ve been asleep for over fifteen hours,” Kes said. “Unless, ya know, you guys have been doing other things in bed-”

“Fifteen hours?” Poe asked in shock, sitting up halfway with Finn following his example.

Kes shrugged. “You must’ve needed the sleep. But I made breakfast and you aren’t going to want to eat it cold so I came in here to wake you up.”

Poe sat up the rest of the way and rubbed at his eyes and his face tiredly. “Ugh. Can’t you knock?” Poe asked frustratedly, gesturing towards the door.

Kes crossed his arms. “I suppose I could if there are things going on in here that would deem knocking necessary. Why? Were you two having a moment?”

“Yeah. A moment of peace,” Poe groaned, throwing himself back onto the bed. “Gosh.”

Kes stood there in silence. “I made a scramble.”

Finn looked from Poe to Kes. “Sounds good.”

“I left some without any eggs for Poe,” he said.

Finn looked at Poe, only seeing him laying there with his arms crossed all grumpily, not responding. Finn looked back at Kes and smiled. “Poe appreciates that,” he said in assurance. He started to get up from the bed. “We’ll be there soon.”

“Good,” Kes said with a smile. He stood there with his hands on his hips as Finn got to his feet.

Finn felt kind of awkward just waiting for him to leave. He rubbed the back of his head, looking between him and Poe before finally saying something. “Give us a minute?” He would try and figure out what was up with Poe. And hopefully, get him in a better mood before breakfast.

“Right,” Kes said, rubbing his hands on his pants awkwardly. “I’ll leave you two to it.”

“Thanks.”

“But don’t take too long,” Kes said, saluting Finn. “Don’t want to eat a cold scramble.”

“Just a few more minutes,” Finn assured him.

“Good,” Kes said, finally leaving the room, almost abruptly, and closing the door.

Finn found the interaction a bit odd and… awkward but he shook it off and turned his attention to Poe. He was laying on his back, with his arm thrown over his eyes to block the lights above them. He seemed a little on edge, a little stressed.

Finn could think of a few things to get him like that. First off, Poe was always a little bit twitchy on a good day. So it wasn’t too unexpected. Second, Poe could have been startled when his dad barged in, reminded of all the times in the last few years when he’d been in a peaceful slumber only to have it interrupted by loud noises. But Poe could also be upset that their time together was interrupted. Finn knew he was also enjoying it.

Finn climbed back on the mattress and sat on his knees next to Poe. “Hey,” he said. When Poe didn’t respond, his fingers just flexing and twitching while he laid there in silence, Finn leaned over him to block the light from his eyes. He reached up and took a hold of Poe’s hand, bringing his arm away from his face.

Poe let Finn take his hand, hesitatingly gripping it in return. He blinked his eyes open, smiling when he saw Finn’s face hovering over him. They both smiled and laughed, happy to look into each other’s eyes for the first time that day. “Hi,” Poe said, unable to do anything to hide the faint blush on his cheeks.

Finn raised his eyebrows and cocked his head a little bit. “So you’re in a good mood now, huh? Just like that?” He rubbed his thumb over the back of Poe’s hand.

“It’s hard to be in a bad mood when I open my eyes to a face like yours,” Poe said, scrunching up his nose at the end. He smiled, big and bright, making his face all wrinkly in all the right places. But it faded and he sighed. “We were having a moment, Finn.”

Finn didn’t even have to try to figure out what it was that made Poe so grumpy all of a sudden. Poe just told him. Sometimes he did that. “We’ll have more moments,” Finn assured him.

Poe held Finn’s hand to his chest, playing with his large fingers absentmindedly. “You sure?” Finn nodded. Poe smiled and sat up, nearly bumping faces with Finn. He never let go of Finn’s hand. “Thank you.”

Finn just smiled. They both glanced down at their connected hands and Poe laughed a little. Finn knew if Poe had any say in it they’d stay there all day but they needed to eat. He sighed and pulled on Poe’s hand, slowly starting to climb towards the edge of the bed. “Breakfast,” he reminded Poe. Poe somewhat begrudgingly followed Finn out of the bedroom and into the dining area where two steaming bowls of scramble, one with eggs and one without, sat waiting for them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Kudos and comments are highly appreciated!
> 
> Thank you for reading!!!


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here is chapter 4! You will finally start to get introduced to some of the plots now. Enjoy!

“Well, good morning! Glad to see you finally climbed out of your cave.” Kes greeted Finn and Poe warmly as they entered the world of the living. He saw the significantly less irritated and grumpy look on Poe’s face and smirked. “You know, I could never get him out of these moods in the morning. How do you do it, Finn?” he asked as Finn sat at the table and Poe walked into the kitchen to toast some bread.

Finn shrugged. “I don’t know.” He breathed in the fresh smell of the scramble and instantly started salivating. Inside of it there was some kind of squash, peppers, some green things, and something purple. “Oh. This looks good,” Finn said excitedly, digging into it and taking his first bite. Finn suddenly did not care about anything but the explosion of flavor and texture in his mouth. There was something sweet, something spicy, savory, and salty all in one bite. Something gave a satisfying crunch in the midst of the spongy eggs and other soft vegetables.

“Well, a little hanky-panky can go a long way with anybody,” Kes said casually. “I can’t help with that though so I’m glad you took care of him.”

“Dad!” Poe chided from his spot over the griddle in the kitchen.

Finn could care less about what they were arguing about now but he had to ask anyway. “What’s a hanky-panky?”

“Do you want any toasted bread, Finn?” Poe asked, seemingly forcing a change of subject.

“Mmm. Yes, please,” Finn said. Bread would be perfect! Finn felt like he was being spoiled.

“I would like some-” Kes started to say but Poe spoke over him.

“Got any plant butter, Pops?” Poe asks.

“That’s the only kind of butter I have,” Kes said as Poe opened the conservator, pulling out a tub and setting it next to the hot griddle. “Make sure it’s not-” Poe plopped a blob of fat on the griddle and it started sizzling and smoking. “-too hot…” Kes trailed off and got up to go help Poe.

“I don’t need help toasting bread, Dad-”

Kes butted in between Poe and the griddle turning it down. “Poe, you’re thirty-five years old. How is it possible that you don’t know how to-”

“I can toast bread!”

“You burnt the butter!” Kes used a piece of bread to soak up the burnt butter and showed it to Poe.

Poe pouted and crossed his arms. “Well, sorry I’m a bit out of practice in the kitchen. I’ve been kind of busy lately.”

“I know!” Kes replied, throwing the piece of bread in the trash. They went silent for a moment. The only sound they could hear was the sound of Finn enjoying his breakfast at the table.

“Mmm. This is so good,” he complimented. Finn seemed blissfully unaware of Poe and Kes arguing over burnt plant butter. Maybe he was just so used to Poe’s chaos that adding an older version of Poe into the mix didn’t phase him.

Kes started spreading butter on the pieces of bread. “You were never good at doing anything in the kitchen,” Kes said and Poe gave a half shrug. There wasn’t anything he could argue. Poe was never good at cooking. He burnt everything. Kes lowered his voice. “You better hope Finn knows how to cook otherwise you’ll both be going hungry.”

Poe leaned against the counter while his dad toasted the bread. He looked over at Finn, who was enjoying his food and having a conversation with JayZee about the purple plant that was in the scramble that Finn was curious about. “You’re probably going to have to teach him. I don’t think that was ever a part of his training,” he said, quieter than he was speaking before.

“Well, someone is going to have to feed you after I’m dead,” Kes said, pressing the bread against the griddle carefully to make sure it got an even seer.

While Kes made sure the bread would be perfect, Poe’s eyes wandered to the tub of plant butter. His dad used to hate plant butter. Even when he started having problems with butter last time he was home for a prolonged period of time he always had some local runyip milk butter in the conservator. Now there was no sign of any kind of milk butter anywhere. Just a giant tub of plant butter. “Who is she?” Poe asked. Between that and the ‘hanky-panky goes a long way’ comment earlier and the way he was happy to let them go to bed so soon, Kes had to have someone keeping him company.

Kes would never give up milk butter without someone giving him a really good reason too. He wouldn’t even do it when his own son was having severe reactions to it. It had to be someone important, someone who was giving Kes a little hanky-panky of his own.

Poe saw Kes bite his cheek as he flipped the bread. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“You’re seeing someone,” Poe said, unable to keep a grin off of his face. “Someone who cares about you enough to get you to eat healthier.” He pointed towards the tub of plant butter. “Someone who has been satisfying your need for social interaction at least to the point where you let us go to bed before it was dark without trying to convince us to stay up and keep you company later.”

Kes tried to waved Poe off. “That doesn’t mean-”

“Someone who’s giving the Sargent a little hanky-panky of his own, huh?” Kes snapped his head towards Poe and glared. Poe snapped a finger and pointed it at his dad. “I knew it! You’re seeing someone!”

“Poe-”

“So when do I get to meet her? Does she have kids my age?” Poe asked, standing up straight and dropping his arms to his sides. “You know I’ve always wanted siblings.” Poe was awfully enthusiastic about it. Poe had been trying to get Kes to get out there and meet someone for years. He hated leaving his dad all alone on the ranch with only two droids to keep him company.

“Poe…” Kes sighed, but he couldn’t hide the faint smile on his face. “They want to meet you too.”

“They?” Poe asked.

“She comes with family,” Kes explained, turning his attention back to the bread. He switched the griddle off and served the bread onto a plate before turning to Poe who looked completely intrigued and expectant. “A daughter and a son. The son is off-world. Recently enlisted in the Navy. The daughter is married and has a month old son.”

“What?!” Poe blurted. “Why didn’t you tell me?!”

“I knew you were struggling enough as it was out there. I didn’t want to make it harder on you knowing you were missing out on something here,” Kes said.

“I want to meet them.”

“No. You want to hold that baby,” Kes corrected him, knowing just how much Poe hated to admit that he adored babies.

“So do you,” Poe rebutted gesturing at his father. Kes also loved babies.

“I do!” Kes said. “Of course, I do. He’s basically my first grandchild. Which reminds me, we’re gonna have to start planting ideas in Finn’s head.” He said the last part really fast as he grabbed the plate and headed back towards the table where Finn was still talking to JayZee.

“No,” Poe said, hurrying after him.

“So, Finn!” Kes sat across from the former stormtroopers and set the plate down in front of him.

Finn turned his attention from the droid to Kes. “Yes,” he said. He eyed the plate of toasted bread for a second before he grabbed one and bit down on it, releasing a satisfying crunch. “Mm.” Poe hurriedly sat down next to Finn, probably closer than was necessary. Finn smiled at him, something slightly dreamy, slightly amused in there. Poe’d been in a hurry to intervene before his father could-

“Now that the war is over, do you think you’ll be settling down anytime soon?” Kes asked nonchalantly.

Poe sighed, knowing he was too late. He grabbed his bowl of scramble which was probably cold by now and started munching on his bread.

Finn looked at Poe next to him and then back at Kes before answering. “...I thought that’s what I was doing…? Um… what exactly do you mean by ‘settling down’?” he asked a bit sheepishly. Finn usually asked Poe questions like that without any hesitance or shame but he would get embarrassed asking other people.

“You know? Starting a family? Having kids? That kind of stuff,” Kes explained. To Finn’s delight, Kes was much like Poe in the way he responded to Finn’s… questions. At least so far. Finn hadn’t asked him very many yet.

“Oh…” Finn said. He looked a little sad almost, looking down at his bread for a moment. “I don’t know… I never had a family. Not sure what it’s supposed to be like.”

“What about kids?” Kes asked.

Finn shrugged. Somehow that topic must’ve been easier because he took a bite of the bread again. “I haven’t been around kids much.” He swallowed and hummed. “Actually, I was moved around quite a bit in my early years. They had me in the infant care facility for a while but they moved me up to child care. I hated it.”

Poe couldn’t help the slight disappointment he felt. “Really?”

Finn looked over at him, examining his features. He could see Poe was… put off by something. He didn’t know what. “Yeah… I cared too much. Apparently, I held the infants too closely. I was too comforting…” Finn thought back to those cold days in the First Order. “Same reason they kicked me out of childcare and… every other job they gave me until they placed me on sanitation. No one to care about except the floors.” Finn shook his head. “That’s not true though. I always found someone to care about.”

“So you actually liked taking care of the children?” Kes asked.

Finn nodded. “I liked that part. I hated the First Order part.”

“We all do,” Poe assured him. Finn looked at him again. Whatever had put him off seemed to have been resolved. Poe looked happy, relieved.

Finn finished the last bite of his bread before dusting the crumbs from his hands. Then a thought popped in his head. “You know? That reminds me…” he looked up at the ceiling and counted something on his fingers. “If I were still in the First Order right now, I probably would have kids.”

Poe didn’t seem to like this either. “Why?”

“I was part of the breeding program.”

Poe nearly choked. “The what?”

“They sterilized most First Order stormtroopers when we were first sanctioned in,” Finn explained. “Only a select few were put into the breeding program. You had to meet certain physical and biological criteria in order to qualify. And then once you reached a certain level…” Finn trailed off feeling a bit awkward. “Well, you’d… do the… breeding. It was almost treated like a prize or a goal. A privilege.”

“But you’d only breed so that the First Order had more forces to oppress the galaxy with,” Poe assumed.

“Pretty much,” Finn confirmed. “I don’t think it can really be compared to the normal way of having kids. But… I don’t know. I guess I’m lucky because now that I’m out I’m one of the few people that gets to choose something like that. Others that are out will never have the chance because the First order took it away from them.”

“You deserve the right to choose,” Kes assured Finn and Poe nodded in agreement. He was still sitting close to Finn, encroaching into his space like he always did. Finn still didn’t mind at all. It felt comforting.

Even as Poe sat there staring at him, Finn felt as if he were intruding. Finn hummed. He appreciated that he could have this talk and share with Poe and his dad but he wanted to have a minute alone. Perhaps Poe and Kes needed a minute too. “I’m gonna go get dressed,” Finn said.

“Ok,” Poe said, watching Finn get up and leave.

Kes saw the way Poe was watching him and biting his lip. His son’s eyes definitely went down to Finn’s ass for a minute. “You want to have babies with him,” Kes whispered.

Poe snapped his head back around at his dad. “He doesn’t even know that…” Poe trailed off and rubbed the back of his neck. He sighed before looking his dad dead in the eye. “When, in the middle of a war, are you supposed to say ‘hey, by the way, I am only half-human and the other half of me is a near-human subspecies with hermaphroditic tendencies and can become pregnant and that includes me’?” Poe buried his face in his hands and groaned.

“Well, I can see how that would be difficult to bring up,” Kes said. “However, late is better than never.” When Poe rested his elbows on the table, Kes reached across and grabbed his hands. “Poe… you’re not ashamed of it, are you?”

“No! No…” Poe said. “It’s part of who I am. But it’s just… it’s not very common so it could be awkward and… I don’t want him to feel like I’ve been lying to him since I’ve never brought it up. And me telling him could imply things and I just don’t want to make him feel… not good.”

“Poe…” Kes said soothingly. “Did you ever lie to him?”

“No. No one ever asks,” Poe said. “It never came up. Everyone always assumes I’m just human, a regular human male. Which, in most cases, is a safe assumption and it makes no difference but when…” Poe took a second to breathe. He licked his lips before continuing. “... when you have to tell someone you love that you’re not who they think you are-”

“Remember what you told me about him two years ago, just a few days after you’d met him?” Kes interrupted. He was still holding Poe’s hands comfortingly, watching his son lovingly. When Poe looked down and bit his lip, making it clear he didn’t know where Kes was going with this. “He’s a good man, Poe. You know it. I know it.  _ He  _ knows it. He’ll understand why it’s never come up.”

Poe knew Kes was right. Finn was incredibly open-minded, especially considering where he was raised. If anyone would understand, it would be Finn. He nodded. “You’re right. And… I’m planning on talking to him about it just… when the time is right.”

“There’s never a right time for this kind of stuff, Poe,” Kes reminds him.

Poe sighed, pulling a hand away from his dad and running it through his hair. It was a lot longer than the last time he’d visited home. “Well, what do you suggest I do?”

“I don’t have any experience in this, unfortunately. Your mom and grandfather were the Ommaiks of the family,” Kes said, sitting back a little. “If anybody knew of how other people handled this situation, it would’ve been them. Even then, very few of the people in the Bey bloodline ended up like you.” Kes could see Poe staring blankly at the tabletop, looking a little lost. “You’re rare, Poe. Finn needs to know that.”

Poe nodded slowly. Kes always preferred to use the term rare to describe Poe. It made him seem like a gem, a diamond in the rough. To Kes, he was. Poe smiled. “Thanks, Dad.” He made no promise to talk to Finn. He still had to figure out what he was even going to say. But it was at least a signal that the conversation could be over now and he got the point.

Upon first glance, Poe was a good looking human. Ultimately, he was completely human. But he wasn’t just human. His mother came from a long line of Ommaiks, a near-human subspecies that was mostly wiped during the dark ages. Purists tended to find their particular breed of human to be unnatural mostly because, on occasion, some people didn’t have strictly male or female reproductive capabilities. It depended on the season. It was more common back then but as Ommaik people crossbred with other human subspecies, as there are many, the trait became less common. By the time Poe was born, the trait was so rare that Shara and her father didn’t think it would happen to Poe especially since he was half-human.

But Poe is rare.

  
  


After getting dressed, Finn made the mistake of sitting on the bed… and then laying on the bed because it felt so nice. If he listened carefully he could hear the distant sound of Poe and his father talking. He couldn’t make out any words which was probably for the better. After the way he’d left them, he might not want to hear what they were saying. He hoped they weren’t talking about him.

Finn thought maybe he would get away without having that out-of-place feeling on Yavin IV because he was surrounded by Poe. But the feeling still managed to creep up on him. Something about the way Kes started asking Finn about ‘settling down’ and kids made him a little bit uncomfortable. It’s not that the idea itself was off-putting it was just… he felt like there was something going on that he was unaware of and both Poe and Kes knew about it and weren’t telling him.

He wondered if the droids knew too. Would BB-8 tell him? Maybe JayZee would tell him. She sure seemed to like to gossip about the fruit pickers. She would probably have an inside scoop. He knew Maury wouldn’t tell him. ...Finn felt like that droid didn’t like him. He knew D-O would tell him except D-O probably had no idea what was going on either because D-O is as clueless as he is most of the time. Finn spent five minutes wondering if the droids had a better clue of what was going on than he did. Then he finally realized that maybe there was nothing? And he was just being paranoid.

Either way. Finn needed to stop thinking about it.

He heard the voices in the other room had stopped. The bedroom door opened and Poe came in. He saw Finn laying on the bed. “Buddy,” he said, walking up to the side of the bed, placing a hand on Finn’s back. “Are you ok? I know it was probably hard to talk about all that stuff. Just for future reference, you don’t have to do that if you don’t feel-”

“No,” Finn said, rolling on his side to face him a bit. “I’m ok. It helps to talk.” And it does. Finn likes to get those things off his chest. He likes to say it out loud because it becomes real for him. “I just… I sat down on the bed.”

“And then you laid down?”

“Yeah,” Finn said. It felt kind of weird to be in a place where he can just do that. He can lay down and there is nothing demanding him to get up. Finn likes it. He wants to be rebellious and lay in bed all day. Finn sat up. Maybe another day. “What were you and your dad talking about? It sounded kinda serious.”

Poe looked uncomfortable. He wrung his hands together and fidgeted a little. “You heard?”

“Not really. I wasn’t trying to…” Finn sighed. “Was it about me? I don’t know. Maybe I shouldn’t have said some of that stuff in front of your dad-”

“Nononono,” Poe said, taking a seat next to Finn. “It wasn’t that. It’s just… my dad and I needed to talk something out. Uh…” Poe pinched the bridge of his nose. “It wasn’t about you. He loves you, you know that?” Poe looks at him, a proud smile on his face. “He thinks you’re amazing.”

Finn slowly started to feel better, more confident. “Really?”

“Yeah. He thinks we’re a good team,” Poe said. Team? Couple? What’s the difference?

Finn smiled, just slightly. But it was still a smile. “I like him too. He reminds me of you.”

Poe frowned. “Pft. What?”

“Yeah. It’s weird looking at him sometimes because you look a lot like him. And your voices are very similar too. Very similar. When I heard your voices in the distance I almost couldn’t tell them apart.” Finn bumped his shoulder with Poe’s. “But I know your voice really well.”

“I also got his nose,” Poe said, not sounding too happy about it. He poked his nose, pushing it a little flat.

Finn furrowed his brows. “It’s a good nose.” Poe shrugged, not really caring to express his discontentment. “I like it.”

Poe stopped fidgeting for a split second. Finn liked his nose? “Me too.” If Finn liked his nose then so did he. He didn’t even remember where he got the idea that his nose was weird… probably an old boyfriend, the one who not only fed off his insecurities but gave him new ones.

“I don’t think you got his hair,” Finn said, reaching up and running his hand through his beautiful brown curls. Kes’s hair didn’t seem curly but he kept it pretty short so it was hard to tell. “Did your mom have curly hair?”

Poe nodded, leaning into Finn’s touch. He loved having his head touched. Especially by Finn. When Finn had his hands in his hair, it turned him into clay. And when Finn would occasionally pull on it, he would nearly swoon. It was a huge turn on when Finn put his hand in his hair. It was comforting but so hot at the same time. Poe could hardly handle it but he could never tell Finn to stop.

“I wonder what else you got from your mom,” Finn said.

Poe huffed thinking ‘you have no idea, pal.’

“Do you have a picture I could see?” Finn asked, removing his hand from Poe’s hair.

Poe wanted to tell Finn not to stop, to keep going, to do more. But he didn’t. He got up and walked over to his closet, pulling out a framed picture. He handed it to Finn. “Her name was Shara,” Poe said, taking a seat on the bed again.

“I remember,” Finn assured Poe, taking the photograph and examining it. She was beautiful. Her skin was lighter than Poe’s, softer. Her hair was just as curly as Poe’s but it looked almost black in the picture whereas Poe’s was brown. Her brown eyes were bright and full of life. “Wow…” Finn said. “She’s amazing.”

Poe smiled. “She is.”

“You definitely have her curls,” Finn said. He held the picture up next to Poe’s face. “Smile.” Poe scrunched his face up making an exaggerated smile and Finn smacked his knee. “A real smile.” Poe laughed. Which was good because when Poe laughed, he smiled a real smile. “You have her smile,” Finn declared. “Even…” Finn reached up and brushed a finger along Poe’s teeth. “... a couple of crooked teeth.”

“Pffft,” Poe pushed Finn’s hand away and out of his mouth… even though he would’ve loved to suck on those fingers… They both laughed. “Not everybody can have perfect teeth.”

That got Finn wondering… he’d wondered it before. But there was never a time when he could ever entertain those thoughts or pursue answers. “I wonder where my teeth came from.”

Poe’s smile faded into a soft curious look. “Oh yeah?”

Finn nodded. “Sometimes I really want to know who my parents are… or were. They’re probably dead.”

Poe started to smile again. “Why don’t we find out then?”

Finn shrugged and looked away, casting his gaze to the floor. “I don’t know… what if I don’t like what I find?”

Poe could see the lost look in Finn’s eyes. He always saw it. Finn often had this look that sent Poe’s guts wrenching in a way that just made him want to wrap Finn up in his arms and claim him. Finn just wanted to be loved. He wanted to belong somewhere. “I think you’re more afraid of them not liking you…” Poe said carefully. He never liked to place words in Finn’s mouth and fill his head with thoughts that weren’t his. But he felt like Finn was overlooking the bigger issue.

It took Finn a second, but he nodded. “I think you’re right,” Finn said but he trailed off into silence. “Actually, I know you’re right. I’d rather them be bad or dead than good and not like me.”

“No good person could ever not like you, Finn,” Poe said. Maybe it wasn’t completely true but Poe couldn’t understand how anyone couldn’t like Finn. Finn was good. Poe was probably biased because he was in love with Finn. But Finn was good nonetheless.

Finn didn’t respond. He just continued to gaze towards the floor. Poe put his arm around his shoulder and gave it a gentle squeeze. “Whatever you decide, whatever happens, just know that you’re family to me. I care about you a lot and I want you here. You have a place here as long as you want to be here.”

Finn took a deep breath and sighed. Part of him wanted to know what happened to him when he was a kid. He wanted to know if his parents had abandoned him, if they’d sold him, or if they’d been killed. But he hoped he’d been taken from them. He hoped he had a loving family out there looking for him, missing him. But another part of him was happy to be a part of this family. Sure, he was currently with Poe on Yavin IV but anyone in the Resistance was family to him, Rey, Rose, Chewie, everyone. “There’s no place I’d rather be, Poe.”

Finn looked at Poe and they both smiled. “I’m glad you like it here so much,” Poe said, standing up and grabbing Finn’s wrist. “Come on. I want to show you the ranch, buddy. You still haven’t tried a Koyo.”

Finn stood up, setting the picture of Poe’s mother on the mattress. “We just ate, Poe.”

“And you’re always hungry,” Poe said, dragging Finn towards the outside door in the bedroom. He pulled the door open and it slid into the wall smoothly. Before he could leave, he paused. “Wait. Before I forget,” Poe walked over to his bag and dug out his pills and popped one in his mouth.

Finn never really questioned why Poe took whatever it was that he did. Sometimes he wondered. But usually, there were really important things going on and he felt like asking might be a little too personal. But now Finn and Poe were pretty personal with each other… and the most important thing happening right now was fruit.

Poe stepped outside and pointed to his left where perfectly lined rows of trees were being grown. The leaves were a deep green that contrasted well with the fiery orange globes of fruit hanging from them. “They’re just about ready to be harvested. Dad will usually hire a few extra hands to help with the picking and sorting.”

Finn walked with Poe towards the orchard and he could already smell them. They had a strong fruity smell, something of citrus and stone fruit. “Do you help?”

“When I’m here,” Poe replied. “When I was a kid we only had one hundred trees. But slowly, my dad planted more and bought more acreage and now there are thousands of trees. I helped him a lot around the same time we built the chairs and benches. It’s a good business most of the time. Before I came home last time, half of our crop was destroyed by a Leviathan Grub. Took some time to regrow it all.”

“Leviathan grub?” Finn asked.

“Yeah. It’s these tiny little worms that feed on the roots of trees underground for hundreds of years until they’re monstrous. Then they come above ground and destroy everything before they die and get eaten by the stintarils and whisper birds,” Poe explained. “So if you feel the ground moving, just know it’s not a quake. We don’t get those around here. It’s a Leviathan Grub.”

“Do they eat people?” Finn asked warily.

“Not on purpose,” Poe answered as they stopped under a tree. He reached up and twisted one of the fruit until it popped off. He rubbed it on his shirt and handed it to Finn. “You’ve been warned, they’re very juicy.”

“Mm,” Finn hummed, pressing the fruit to his nose. “Oh.” Poe watched him, completely enthralled as Finn sunk his teeth into the large fruit. It was so crisp and juicy and squishy all at once. There was a little bit of tang, a lot of sweet, and a whole lot of flavor. “Mm. That’s good.”

Poe smiled. “They’re the best right?”

“Mhm,” Finn said, taking another big bite, slurping at the juice that spilled out. Poe had an unhealthy obsession with watching Finn eat. But who could blame him? Finn was adorable! Suddenly, Poe was hit with a wave of nausea. Uh oh. He frowned and rubbed his belly. Finn knew that look. He stopped slurping at the fruit and looked at Poe. “Are you ok?”

“Yeah. I’m ok,” Poe said. But he did not sound so sure. “I just… my stomach hurts.”

“Did you eat something?” Finn asked.

“I was careful,” Poe said, shaking his head. “I felt fine until just a second ago. I don’t know what happened.”

Finn thought back to breakfast, thinking about what Poe had eaten. “Maybe there was milk in the bread. Or egg.”

Poe sighed. “I hadn’t thought of that.”

Finn smiled and offered, “Maybe you need me to help you keep track of what you eat.”

Poe nodded, turning around and reaching behind him for Finn. “Maybe I need to go for a walk.” Finn looked down at the Koyo in his hand. “Come on,” Poe said impatiently. Finn took one last bite and threw it on the ground before grabbing Poe’s hand and walking with him. But Poe peeled his hand away. “You’re all sticky,” he complained.

“I was just eating a fruit,” Finn defended himself.

“Now I’m all sticky,” Poe whined, wiping his hand on his pants. It made no difference.

Finn walked beside Poe as they walked through the orchard. “Your body is rejecting what you ate. You should probably just let it. I mean, you’d probably rather it come out this end than the other.”

Poe huffed. "I'd rather not get sick at all. Besides. I'm running out of my medication. I'd just be wasting it by throwing it up."

"Well, maybe your body is rejecting medication," Finn suggested. "And if not, we can get more."

"I'm about to run out," Poe said, trudging through the orchard.

Finn still wondered what the big deal was about Poe's medication. "What do you have to take it for?" Finn asked.

Poe felt his stomach cramp up at the question. Poe really didn't feel like now was the time to discuss his hormone suppressant medication with Finn. Yes, he planned on eventually having that talk with Finn but not so soon. Even just the idea that they could be having this discussion right now when he felt so horrible and was not ready, it made his stomach turn. Or maybe that was whatever he ate.

Finn seemed to notice the way Poe looked, a little bit of dread on his eyes. "Poe, are you ok?" Finn asked, putting a hand on his shoulder and stopping him. Finn was not at all shocked when Poe bent over and wretched. By now, it was a familiar sound. He comfortingly rubbed Poe's back as he emptied the contents of his stomach onto the ground. Finn hated this. He loved to comfort Poe but he hated seeing him sick like this so often. Finn was going to get to the bottom of this. Whatever it took.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading chapter 4! Love hearing from you guys. Thanks for all the kudos and comments on previous chapters. I really appreciate it.


	5. Chapter 5

Finn and Poe had been walking around the orchards and fields for at least half an hour. Finn kept a hand on the small of Poe's back, occasionally rubbing up top and asking if he felt better. It was sweet and made Poe's heart melt every time. Poe felt better, a lot better. But he didn't tell Finn that. He was afraid if he did, Finn would withdraw that comforting touch.

On the edge of one of the orchards was a fallen tree. They sat on the log, again, a lot closer than they needed to. Finn rubbed Poe's back, running his fingers through Poe's hair and scratching his scalp every few minutes. He was good at taking care of Poe. Poe was perfectly capable of taking care of himself but he knew how much it meant to Finn.

Finn was a caregiver and a protector at heart. He was a nurturer. He lived to take care of those that he loved. And growing up as a nurturer in the First Order was unforgiving. No matter what job he was given, he was too caring. When he was assigned to sanitation and disposal, he managed to save a flock of batlike creatures from Starkiller. When he was placed in infant care, he was too kind. When he was assigned to powder coat an officer's room, he was too nurturing towards the other trooper that was having an asthma attack from the fumes.

Finn needed to take care of people. So Poe let him. Besides, Poe enjoyed being taken care of. He was a mess and kind of needed it more than he realized.

Finn picked at the bark of the tree. A purple sheen rubbed onto his fingers. "Is this a massassi?" he asked Poe, receiving a nod in reply. "Why are they purple?"

Poe shrugged. "I don't know," he shook his head. He liked answering Finn's questions but he never had good explanations for the ‘why's’. "The moss is used as pigment for high-value paint. Since it's iridescent it's pretty rare. My mom used it as makeup sometimes…" Poe rubbed the pad of Finn's finger, smearing the shiny purple pigment flat. "Between this, the bioluminescent elements of the jungle, and the Yavin glow there's no need for a glowrod at night."

Finn watched as Poe fondly played with the bark, a soft look on his face. Perhaps he was thinking about his mother wearing the shiny shade of purple around her eyes. “You’ll have to show me. I really want to see it.”

“We’ll have to actually stay up late enough tonight then,” Poe retorted, a barely noticeable chuckle on the end of it. “We crashed pretty early last night.”

“We did,” Finn agreed. “But we had a pretty long day before. But we’ve gone longer without sleep.”

Poe huffed. “Yeah. Don’t remind me of all the precious beauty sleep I’ve missed out on in the last three years. Even the past seven years. The Republic Navy wasn’t as busy as the Resistance but I didn’t have nearly as much freedom there…”

“Is that why you don’t want to go back?” Finn asked.

Poe nodded. “Yeah. I suppose that is one reason. But I also just…” Poe shook his head. “... don’t want to. I’m not the same person I was when I joined the academy or the same person I was when I left to join the Resistance. Just like the twenty-two-year-old who returned home all those years ago wasn’t the same fifteen-year-old kid who left.”

“I understand,” Finn said with a nod. “When things change, so do you. And when you change you can barely recognize yourself. It’s been happening to me a lot since leaving the First Order…” Finn thought back to those first few months. “I was so happy to just be free, to be able to care about people, and to have friends. It was more exciting than it was terrifying. But then people started calling me ‘Sir’. I always wished I could be in charge but I felt like I was the wrong man for the job.”

“You weren’t though,” Poe assured him.

“I was so young and inexperienced-”

“You’re a natural leader,” Poe interrupted him. “That made you the right man for the job regardless of your age and where you came from.”

“Yeah but would I have ever gotten there without you?” Finn found himself asking.

“Would I have without you?” Poe retorted almost immediately. “Look. I’m not a leader, Finn. I’m a pilot that a lot of people listen to. I started a mutiny and people followed because I’m Poe Dameron, the poster boy of the Resistance, Leia’s  _ second  _ favorite flyboy next to Han Solo. But you? Finn, you walked in there with no connections whatsoever and a pretty sketchy past, and people listened because you’re a good leader. Everyone could see that you were a good person and when you took charge, we all respected that.”

Finn furrowed his brows. “Took charge?”

Poe shrugged. “You’re a take-charge kind of guy, Finn.”

“I’m not a-”

Poe put a hand up to silence him. “You’re a take-charge kind of guy,” he said as if it were the end of the discussion. Finn looked very unimpressed with Poe. Poe sighed and rolled his eyes. “You are.”

“So are you,” Finn argued.

“Nonono,” Poe disagreed. “I’d just rather be giving the orders than taking them. That’s controlling. I-” Poe closed his mouth and bobbed his head in consideration. “I have a thing about being in control, ok? That’s why I’m a pilot. That’s why I lost my shit on the  _ Raddus _ . That’s why me and my dad had a falling out. Pretty much every stupid thing I’ve done has been because I felt like I was out of control.”

Finn nodded. “Ok. Ok. I get what you’re trying to say.”

“We need each other, Finn,” Poe blurted. “I need a backbone. You’re my backbone. I need you.”

“I need you too, Poe,” Finn said and they both went quiet, looking at each other and smiling. Poe seemed to be feeling a lot better. “You’re not really feeling sick anymore, are you?”

Poe blinked and slouched, almost immediately putting on an act. “I don’t know…” he mumbled. Then he looked at Finn expectantly, like maybe Finn would continue to groom him and spoil him if he pretended to be sick still.

Finn wasn’t having any of it though. He knew when Poe was banthashitting. “You know, you don’t have to pretend to be sick to get attention from me?” Finn said, trying not to grin.

“I wasn’t pretending,” Poe defended himself.

“Oh, you  _ weren’t  _ pretending when you puked your guts out right in front of me. I know that much. But you’re pretending right now,” Finn said. Poe proceeded to pout at Finn, almost childishly. “If you want me to keep babying you, you can just ask. You don’t have to be all manipulative with that pouty face of yours.”

Poe’s pout immediately turned into a grin and he leaned close to Finn. There was something devilishly demure about the glint in his eyes. Finn waited to hear his response but Poe opted for the long, dramatic pause all for, “Are you calling me a baby?”

They both sputtered at that. “Maybe.”

Poe scrunched up his nose as he smiled, almost laughing until a thought popped in his head. He gasped and grabbed Finn by the shoulders. “I might be an uncle.”

Finn was not expecting such a drastic change of subjects but it wouldn’t be the first time Poe had randomly changed subjects on him. His mind tended to wander at times. “Um… sorry, I don’t follow.”

“Oh, right. You were talking to JayZee,” Poe remembered out loud. “My dad has a girlfriend.”

“Oh,” Finn said. He blinked. “How does that make you an uncle?”

“She has a daughter who has a baby,” Poe explained.

Finn pursed his lips, finally understanding where Poe had gone off on his little trail. “Oh. So that’s where you-ok.”

“I don’t know her name though. Or any of their names,” Poe said, sounding a little disappointed.

“You’ve never met them before?”

“No. I just found out about them this morning,” Poe informed him. “I have a feeling my dad is going to invite them over to meet us, well, to meet me but the ‘us’ is implied cause-” Poe gestured between the two of them before he shrugged and continued. “I don’t know anything about them other than there is a baby but I’m pretty excited.”

Finn had a fond look on his face. “You really like babies, don’t you?” Finn asked Poe. He could tell he did. It shed a little light on why Poe was reacting the way he had earlier that morning when Finn was talking about his time in the First Order.

Poe tried to downplay it a little. He shrugged nonchalantly. “They’re cute.” Finn nudged Poe with his shoulder and Poe admitted the truth. “I love them, ok? Is that so bad? I just want to be ‘Uncle Poe’.”

“Just ‘Uncle Poe’?” Finn asked. “You sure you don’t want to be ‘Dad’ to anyone?”

Poe bit his lower lip, realizing just how close he and Finn still were. He leaned back a little, looking down and shaking his head. “No, I don’t,” Poe said before smiling and looking up at Finn. “My kids are gonna call me ‘Papa’.”

Finn laughed. “You want kids?” Finn asked.

Poe shrugged. “I mean… yeah. I think I do. At least now I do. I always liked kids but I never saw myself settling down and having any until more recently. I always thought I would be out there in the stars living on the edge.”

So much of Poe’s identity was out there in the stars. The idea that he might not be out there every waking day put an odd feeling in his stomach. Being on the ground too long had always made Poe twitchy and restless. If he had a bad day, he would blow off steam by flying.

But flying had changed for him. The very center of himself was changing, shifting. Poe had dedicated most of his energy and life to flying. But now flying wasn’t what it used to be. Now whenever he flew, he would hear, see, and feel the things from the battle of Exegol: explosions, flashes, Snap dying, his  _ friends  _ dying, and an overall feeling of panic, failure, and loss. Flying wasn’t what it used to be and Poe was different now. Poe didn’t feel like Poe Dameron, the Resistance’s poster boy, and Leia’s second favorite flyboy.

“What do you think now?” Finn asked Poe.

Poe could barely admit it to himself. “I think…” Poe trailed off. He reminded himself that this was Finn. He could tell Finn anything. He should tell him everything even when he wasn’t completely sure about it or ready to admit it. “I think I can’t live like that anymore.”

There.

It was easier to say than Poe had thought it would be.

“It’s hard to admit because I always thought I would die out there. I think every pilot likes to think that’s how they’ll go out but…” Poe shakes his head. “I think I might want more than that or just something else.”

“And you think you might want to ‘settle down’,” Finn concluded, almost as a question though.

Poe nodded and chewed on his cheek thoughtfully. “I used to tell myself that I had time and I would worry about it later but now I’m thirty-five and time isn’t as charitable as it used to be. If I wanted to do something like that… if I wanted to have kids, it would have to be now or probably never.”

“Then you should,” Finn said. Poe looked at him a little unsure. “If that’s what you want, you should do it. There will always be reasons to fly if you ever want to go back out there. The stars aren’t going anywhere, Poe.”

“Yeah,” Poe agreed. He clutched his mother’s wedding ring that hung around his neck, took a breath, and looked up at the Yavin sky. There were no stars visible yet but he knew they were out there. “I know that…” He did. He needed a little more time to accept that he wasn’t just a hotshot pilot anymore. He needed to grieve that part of his identity. He needed to welcome back the Poe that had once lived on the ranch with just his dad, a couple of droids, and the distant memory of his mother. “I just need to get used to seeing them from the ground again.”

Finn looked up at the sky, blue with a large red, orb covering up a large section of it. Clouds weren’t scarce either. “Can you see them very well from here?” Finn wondered.

Poe hummed thoughtfully. “Depends. Sometimes that red giant is in the way.”

“What about when it’s not?” Finn asked.

“Well…” Poe said, trailing off into thought. He tried to remember at what point in the cycle they’d arrived. He did a few calculations, thinking about where they were in their orbit and when the sun would be setting. He thought about the weather too. Would the clouds be in the way? Would it rain? Then Poe smiled at Finn. “Wait until tonight and you’ll get to see it for yourself. We’ll take a few blankets out and lay on the top of the house for the best view. If the forecast is nice enough maybe we’ll even sleep up there.”

Finn smiled, almost in disbelief, almost laughing. “Sleeping on top of the house?”

Poe shrugged. “For fun.” Then he winked at Finn. “It’s a bit of a Dameron tradition.”

Finn’s smile softened. “Oh yeah? Tell me about it.”

“No, buddy. You can wait for that.” They laughed. They both knew how much Finn loved to hear stories, especially when it was coming from Poe’s lips. “I’ll tell you later tonight. Then we’ll have something to talk about.”

“Fine,” Finn huffed. “Make me wait.”

Poe stood up and gestured for Finn to follow him. “Come on. We’ve been out here long enough. We should probably see if my dad needs help with anything. I might go work on my X-Wing in the hangar. Needs a tune-up.”

Finn almost asked Poe why he needed to tune up his X-Wing if he was thinking about hanging up the helmet for a while. But he knew Poe was having a hard time letting that go. He would eventually figure it out on his own. Finn stood up and they started to walk together. “You go ahead and do that. I know you’re probably dying to get your hands covered in grease.”

“You sure know me well,” Poe commented.

“I’ll go find your dad and see if I can help him with anything,” Finn assured him. Then bumped him with his shoulder. “Hey, think you can get anything on that stomach yet? I don’t want you passing out or anything.” Finn wasn’t going to bring up all the times Poe had acted strangely tired and fatigued when he didn’t get enough sustenance. And not to mention just overall pretty grumpy and not nice to be around.

Poe hummed, immediately not seeming thrilled about the idea of eating so soon after puking his guts out. “I don’t know… maybe in a little while.”

“You need to hydrate before you go in the hangar,” Finn said. There was a firmness in his voice that almost sounded a bit motherly. It was not a request. Poe was going to rehydrate one way or another.

Poe looked at Finn as they trudged back through the orchard, taking a shorter way back to the house instead of weaving through rows and going around sections. He had a look on his face. It was almost smug but it wasn’t challenging. The look said something but Finn could not figure out what it was.

“Don’t give me that look,” Finn said.

Poe smirked and shook his head. “This is what I’m talking about when I say you take charge.”

“Me telling you to drink water is not me taking charge, Poe.”

“Yeah. It is.”

“I have to be like that with you because if I’m not, then you won’t listen.”

“Yeah, I know. It’s kinda hot,” Poe said, not even bothering to slip in a flirty tone with his shameless flirt. Finn rolled his eyes. “What?”

“Hot?”

“I’m just saying that, in my opinion, I find your take-charge-ness attractive,” Poe admitted. It was a bit of a risky admission considering they were friends, teetering on the edge of something more possibly. But he felt Finn should at least know that small detail. It couldn’t hurt. “It works for you. Not everybody can do it right but you do it so naturally and that’s hot.”

“Hm,” Finn hummed thoughtfully, pausing for a moment to process that. “Really? You think I’m hot?”

Poe stopped in his tracks. “Oh, buddy. Have you seen yourself? You, my friend, have got the entire package.” Poe vaguely gestured to the entirety of Finn’s being. “You’re flawless. I cannot find a single thing wrong with you. You’re pure at heart. You’re strong, emotionally. But also, physically!” Poe began to ramble. “I mean, your arms get bigger every time I look at you.”

Finn chuckled and reached to touch Poe on the shoulder. “Poe, you don’t have to-”

“Big hands,” Poe said, gesturing to Finn’s hand before looking down at Finn’s feet. “Big feet. You know what they say about big feet,” Poe said suggestively.

Finn paused blinking. “Uh. Actually, no. I don’t know.” Poe then bit his lip. “Is it bad?” Finn asked, sounding concerned.

“Big feet?”

“Yeah.”

“Oh no. It’s good,” Poe assured him. “Trust me, Pal. You’ve been blessed by the force.” He patted Finn on the shoulder and continued walking, nearing the edge of the orchard.

As Finn and Poe parted ways, Finn felt something odd, something calling to him. He turned around, watching as Poe meandered to the hangar to get to work on his X-Wing. He turned a little more, towards what he felt calling him. He thought perhaps there would be a person but… it was just a tree. Finn shrugged it off before turning back towards the house. He assumed it was probably nothing. At least, nothing worth more than whatever Kes might need help with around the ranch. So that’s what Finn did. He forgot about whatever it was he felt and focused on something tangible like helping Poe’s father for the time being.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading and leaving any kudos or comments! It really brightens my day seeing people appreciate my work. Have a nice day!
> 
> Shout out to Thorki_And_Other_Obsessions for beta-ing this entire fic and helping me stay on track and get it finished. Go show them some love!


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello! So I put together a little website so I could post my update calendar somewhere. If you are interested in when I will be updating my most recent fics, please visit this link: https://sites.google.com/view/r-robinsnest/home (or click the hyperlink at the bottom of the chapter)

Finn eventually found Kes in the vegetable garden where he ended up getting roped into helping prepare lunch. Finn seemed pretty happy to help Kes make lunch though he was surprised there wasn’t anything else he was asked to do around the ranch. Perhaps Kes just wanted to get to know him a little better.

Kes ended up teaching Finn how to cook a simple vegetable stir fry dish, a classic around the Dameron household. “Vegetables from the market just aren’t quite the same,” Kes explained as they both chopped up a hoard of vegetables. “Fresh, straight out of the garden are always the best.”

“Did you always do this?” Finn asked, being careful with his knife as he chopped up some peppers the way Kes had instructed him to. “Garden? And plant, I mean.”

Kes shrugged. “I think it’s always been a passion of mine. I studied biology a lot as a student before I was recruited into the Rebellion. Plant farming always seemed more ethical and sustainable than livestock farming. It worked out well considering… well, considering Poe. Can you imagine me running a runyip ranch with a vegetarian son?”

They both laughed. “Yeah. I can see how that would be a challenge.” Finn could see how anything with Poe could be a challenge. Poe just liked to challenge things.

“Also, I think we can all agree that koyos smell way better than runyips,” Kes pointed out. He turned on the griddle and slapped a spoonful of butter on it to melt.

“I’ve never actually smelled a runyip before but considering how nice koyos smell, I can imagine it’s not as nice,” Finn said, scraping a pile of seeds and scraps into the trash nearby. Next, he got some mushrooms ready to chop up by rinsing them in the sink. He remembered what Poe had told him earlier and decided to bring it up with Kes. “So Poe tells me that you’re seeing someone.”

“Yep,” Kes said, dumping a pile of chopped onions onto the griddles, creating a plume of steam and sizzling sounds.

“He sounded pretty excited about maybe being an uncle,” Finn added as he rinsed the mushrooms.

“Of course, he is. Poe loves babies,” Kes said enthusiastically.

“He talked like maybe they’d want to come and meet Poe,” Finn said. He decided that the mushrooms were probably plenty rinsed by now so he set them on the drying rag by the sink and gently started to dab them dry. He assumed that Kes would correct him if he was doing anything incorrectly.

Kes dumped the peppers on the griddle next, recreating that familiar plume and sizzle as before. “I commed Dinah while you guys were out on your walk,” Kes said. “You were gone for quite a while you know? Enough time that lunch rolled around pretty quickly. What were you two up to?”

Finn turned to face Kes with his hands full of rinsed and dried mushrooms, setting them on the chopping board and shrugging. He honestly wasn’t sure if he should tell Kes about Poe getting sick. He didn’t want to worry him. He knew he was already worried about Poe. They both were. “Poe was showing me around. You have a very beautiful home.”

“Yeah. But… there’s only so much to show. You can only stare at so many koyo trees before it gets repetitive,” Kes said. There was a hint of suggestion in his voice that Finn could not make out. Kes left the peppers and onions on the griddle to simmer and he started slicing the mushrooms.

Finn leaned against the counter, watching Kes carefully slice the mushrooms. “Poe found plenty of things to tell me about.”

“So you guys talked?” Kes asked.

“Yeah. We talk a lot,” Finn said. “We’ve always talked. Or at least wanted to and tried to. But we never had the time and there weren’t very many opportunities. But I imagine now we’ll do a lot more talking.”

“Talking is good,” Kes said. His slicing movements were so smooth and clean and effortless. It was clear that he did this almost every day, multiple times a day. And he enjoyed it.

“So her name is Dinah?” Finn asked.

“Yes. Oh… “ He paused and squinted at Finn. “I forgot to tell Poe that.”

Finn chuckled. “I’m sure he’ll forgive you.” Kes quickly returned his attention to the mushrooms again. “So Dinah? Tell me about her.”

“She is lovely.” Kes finished up with the mushrooms and took a step back, walking over to the pot of rice to check how it was coming along. “She is beautiful.” He stirred the larger pot that had a bit of brown sauce in it. He’d told Finn earlier that the vegetables would go in the sauce when they were finished. And that would go on top of the rice. But not before he fried the rice in some oil and spices. “Most importantly, she loves me. And gardening. I’m hoping she’ll move here someday to keep me better company. I don't get to see her as often as I would like.”

“She sounds nice,” Finn said, appreciating Kes's fondness of her.

“She’ll like you. Both of you,” Kes said nonchalantly. He grabbed a squeezable bottle of oil and added it to the griddle. “You can go ahead and put the mushrooms on now. Mix them in with the peppers and onions.”

Finn grabbed the mushrooms, one handful at a time, and put them on the griddle carefully. “It smells really good,” Finn told him. He grabbed the metal spatula and started mixing the ingredients together. “How did you learn to cook?”

“Two things,” Kes said, holding up two fingers. “The holonet and trial and error. Mostly trial and error. Experience.”

“What about Poe’s mother?” Finn asked carefully. “Did she cook much?”

“Oh. Nononono,” Kes said. “Shara and Poe were never allowed in the kitchen. They would have burned everything down. Pilots don’t live in reality. Their heads are always in space.”

Finn laughed. That morning had been a good example. For one thing, Poe hadn’t even thought about the bread and that maybe he shouldn’t be eating it. But even then, he burnt butter. Poe was a disaster sometimes. It was a miracle he was such a great pilot.

“Her father cooked though,” Kes said. “He handed down a lot of Bey family recipes. You know? There is this one fish recipe,” Kes remembered, holding up a finger in excitement. “It’s incredible. Do you eat fish?”

Finn grinned. “Oh, I love fish. I actually tried seafood for the first time in front of Poe and made a fool of myself.”

“Yeah. He told me about the yocrab thing,” Kes said. “He thinks it was adorable.”

“He teases me about it all the time,” Finn said dryly.

“Only because he loves that memory,” Kes assured him. “Anyways. Fish is one of the meats that Dinah doesn’t get after me for eating. Maybe I can take you to catch a few and we can try that recipe. It’s an authentic Ommaikan dish. Poe hates it though. Cause-”

“Cause he hates fish,” Finn said. “I know. He is pretty picky, isn’t he?”

“He is,” Kes agreed. “But a good cook can make food that anyone will think is delicious, even picky eaters like Poe. And figure out ways to work around restrictions.”

“He only really trusts your cooking,” Finn told Kes as the old man began scraping the sauteed vegetables onto the chopping board to transport them over to the saucepot. “There were multiple times that people cooked food, good food, even vegetarian food, and Poe would not eat it. He always came up with some excuse around whoever made it but later when I asked he would complain about it just not being the same as his dad’s cooking.”

“I’ve spent years perfecting my food so that Poe would like it. He better prefer it,” Kes said adamantly with a smile on his face. He returned to the griddle, squirting oil and sauce on it, to begin frying the rice up. “Speaking of Poe and food, could you go fetch him from the hangar and tell him to clean up? It’ll be ready soon.”

“Of course,” Finn complied. He peaked at the pot of sauce and vegetables, giving it a good sniff. “Oh. That smells good,” he said more to himself than anything. It wasn’t even that long ago that he’d eaten breakfast but his stomach growled in anticipation for his next meal. Oh. He loved this place.

* * *

  
  


Finn heard the sound of music coming from the hangar as he went to fetch Poe. He was more surprised than he should’ve been when he found what he did. First, he saw the nose of Poe’s ship completely taken off, exposing the repulsorlift and flight computer. The hydraulic lines had been removed from the nose and set aside, for some reason abandoned.

Poe was soaked in grease and oil, reaching up to remove yet another panel from his X-Wing. BB-8 was right at his feet, beeping instructions at him which didn’t go well. “I think I’ve got it, Pal,” Poe said as he unfastened the last bolt and the panel came loose, barely being caught by Poe’s shoulder. “Ow.” BB-8 whirled at Poe. “I know what you said! Can you just help me out?!”

“Need a hand?” Finn asked as he moved to help Poe with the panel. It was surprisingly heavy. But they managed to lower it to the ground as BB-8 sassed at both of them.

“I know,” Poe said, panting and putting a hand out towards BB-8. “I heard you the first time. I get it.” Poe sighed and dusted off his hands. Not that it made a difference. They were covered in grease and oil just like the rest of him. He smiled at Finn. “Perfect timing, buddy. Couldn’t have planned that.”

Finn put a hand on his hip, examining the wreck of a shop before him. Poe had literally taken it completely apart. “Poe, what the hell are you doing?” he asked, concerned. “Your ship was fine.”

Poe sighed. Finn wouldn’t understand. Finn wasn’t a pilot. And he wasn’t having a midlife crisis either. “My ship was fine but it wasn’t fantastic,” Poe explained, wiping the sweat on his forehead off with his arm. “Look. It started with me going to fix the landing gear but then I realized the hydraulic lines were out of line and then I realized the repulsorlift needed a lift and then I figured now would be as good a time as any to work on the acceleration compensator.”

“You’re literally soaked in grime,” Finn said, gesturing to the mess of a man before him. “I didn’t know it was possible for you to get that dirty, that fast.”

Poe held up a finger with a bit of cheeky grin. “Oh, buddy. You’d be surprised,” he said suggestively. Then he shrugged. “There was an oil leak.”

“You need to get cleaned up,” Finn said firmly.

“Come on. BB-8 and I were having fun,” Poe said, sounding disappointed. He looked down at his little ball droid. “Weren’t we just having the best time ever, Pal?”

BB-8 looked up at Poe blankly before his little dome rotated to look at Finn. He beeped worriedly. “I’m concerned about him too, Beebee,” Finn agreed. He jabbed a thumb back in the direction of the house. “Lunch is almost ready and you’re not going in there like that. I can smell you from here.-”

“My dad won’t car-”

“You’re gonna get cleaned up,” Finn said again, firmly. He left no room for argument before turning around and walking back to the house.

Poe stood in the hangar with BB-8, watching Finn walk back to the house as the music played in the background. He started wiping at his face as he absentmindedly watched the other man. Poe could see himself getting used to this, working out in the hangar, and having Finn come and get him for meals. He could see himself getting used to Finn. He already was. If he tried to think of his life without Finn, it just came up something blank and miserable.

Finn meant a lot to him.

BB-8 bumped his leg and beeped up at him.

Poe sighed and wiped his hands with the rag. “I know I am, Pal. But can you blame me? He’s pretty amazing.”

* * *

Finn was already dishing up a third helping of lunch onto his plate when Poe finally managed to sit down for lunch. He still smelled of oil but at least he didn’t track any into the house. He’d changed into a pair of coveralls that were out in the hangar before coming inside as per Finn’s orders. Kes seemed surprised. “Wow. You actually cleaned up before coming inside? That’s a bit of a shock.”

Poe shrugged as he mixed around some of the food in his bowl. “Welp. General's orders. What can I say?” He took a bite, filling his mouth with food to hide the grin on his face when Finn gave him a look. It wasn’t a very successful attempt though because he was still very obviously grinning.

Kes watched it happen, the way they were flirting with their eyes. He remembered that feeling with Shara. Kes was never the one to keep things clean or neat. That was always Shara. When she was around, everything was quite orderly and neat. But when she passed, the house and the hangar turned into a mess.

That’s why he purchased MR-9 or, as Poe had called the droid when he was a little kid, Maury. Maury helped keep up with all of the messes Poe and Kes would make. Not long after that, L’ulo L’ampar, a friend of Kes and Shara’s from the Rebellion moved onto the ranch to help raise Poe. L’ulo brought along JayZee, a protocol droid that specialized in service. Between JayZee and Maury, the Dameron Homestead was pretty neat and spotless. Whenever Poe came home, it tended to get a little harder to keep up with though.

Of course, to prove that, as Poe took his second bite he missed his mouth a little bit, spilling sauce down his chin and dropping a mushroom on the floor. “Op.” Poe looked down at the front of his coveralls. “Seriously?” Maury wasted no time popping out his vacuum nozzle and suctioning up the mushroom. Poe looked down at him. “Think you can get my face?” When the droid moved his nozzle up Poe put his hands up in defense. “I’m just kidding, Pal! I don’t know where that thing has been.”

“Could probably say the same thing about you,” Finn mumbled and Poe kicked him from under the table. Finn shrugged. “Just saying. This is my third plate and I’ve managed not to spill anything. But you make a mess on your second bite.”

Poe blinked. “Your third plate? Geez, Finn. Where do you put it all?”

“Not on the floor,” Finn sassed. He took a bite and hummed at the delicious flavor, still amazing on the third plate. “This food is too good for the floor.”

Poe nodded. “It is good, Pops. I missed eating real food.”

“I didn’t do it all by myself,” Kes said. “Finn helped me out. I’m showing him the ropes.”

Poe was holding back another grin as he picked up his glass of water. “Hm. So that’s what’s wrong with it,” he teased as he tipped the water up to his lips, looking for Finn’s reaction. He was quite pleased when he received another kicked in the foot from under the table. Poe laughed, nearly spitting out his drink as his feet moved around, trying to pin down Finn’s. “I’m just kidding,” Poe assured him. When Finn overpowered him, pinning both of his feet to the floor under the table with his own, Poe said it more firmly, “I was just kidding!”

Finn casually munched on his third plate of food while Poe made a fool of himself in front of his father. One minute he was like a toddler child, making a mess and dropping his food on the floor. The next minute, he was flirting with Finn much like a teenage girl might. He kept a firm hold on Poe’s feet to the floor though even as Poe tried to free himself. Eventually, the pilot gave up.

“So, Dad, when can I meet your girlfriend?” Poe asked, suddenly changing the subject.

“She usually comes every Benduday at least,” Kes explained. “When I told her that you were coming she insisted on staying for a few days to get to know you. Her daughter and son-in-law with the baby may come for a night too. They’ll need a room of their own though.”

“That’s ok,” Poe insisted. “Finn and I can sleep in the living room.” Poe seemed to slow down and think about something before turning to look at his dad. He hesitated before asking, “Unless we could stay in the other house?”

“No,” Kes said, shaking his head and leaving no room for argument. “You can’t stay there.”

Finn almost immediately felt the tension in the air. He’d seen the way Poe became hesitant and heard the gentle way Poe had mentioned it. It didn’t seem like something that would constitute Kes being so firm and unmoving about. Finn knew it was necessary with Poe sometimes but definitely not all the time, and definitely not that time either. The uncomfortable silence was making Finn uncomfortable so he cleared his throat. “Um. It’s fine. I’m sure your sofa is far more comfortable than the cots we’ve been sleeping on for the past few years.”

“It is,” Kes said. He stood up and grabbed his plate. “I’m gonna go get to work. You can make sure the leftovers get put away.”

“Yeah. Sure,” Finn said as Kes made his way to the kitchen, leaving his dirty dishes in the sink. His attention was mostly on Poe now though. Poe seemed incredibly less energetic now as he sat there playing with his food.

They both sat in silence until Kes finally made his way out of the house and the door was closed. Poe sighed heavily, dropping his spoon on the table and rubbing at his face with his hands who’s cleanliness were questionable at best. It gave Finn a third thing to be concerned about: Poe was rubbing dirty hands all over his face, Poe’s wasn’t eating, and what was it about the other house that upset them so much?

Finn knew he could overlook the dirty hand thing. It was an unproblematic problem. And he wasn’t really sure if he should ask about the house. So he settled for talking about food, a familiar battle with Poe by now. “Are you going to eat that?” Finn asked after a moment.

Poe only responded by pushing the bowl away from him and towards Finn. “You can have it.”

“Poe, you need to eat more than that,” Finn said, trying to be both firm and gentle at the same time. But more gentle than he normally was. Finn was worried about Poe and it wasn’t helping that he could hardly see his face now. But eventually, after some heavy contemplation, Poe removed his hands, revealing slightly red skin and watery eyes. Poe nodded, pulling the bowl back towards him and spooning at some of the food.

Poe didn’t say anything. Neither did Finn. They just waited until Poe had eaten his meal and then they got up to put the food away. Finn thought maybe Poe would talk to him after he’d had a minute but he was headed towards the door again without a word. Finn grabbed him by the arm. “Hey, wait. Poe, don’t you think we should-”

“Not-” Poe pulled his arm away and put a hand up in defense. “-now, Finn. I just…” Poe realized then just how tense and defensive he was getting with someone who didn’t deserve it. He took a breath and tried to relax. “I just need some time to myself to get out my frustration.”

Finn couldn’t help the way the sudden hot and cold of Poe and Kes’s relationship was affecting him. He’d felt Kes so warmly until Poe had asked the question about the other house. And suddenly Kes went cold on them. And Poe was… he could just feel that Poe was burning hot, with anger and frustration, sadness. It wasn’t unusual for Poe to be like this but it felt different with his father.

Poe must’ve noticed the way Finn was reeling and knew he wanted to step in and help. That was such a Finn thing to do. Poe put a comforting hand on Finn’s shoulder and offered him the best smile he could during a time like that. “We’ll talk later tonight. Remember when I said we’d lay on the roof and look at the stars?”

Finn remembered. And he looked forward to it. He’d never really experienced something like that where he could just casually enjoy the sights that nature offered so generously. Finn nodded. “Tonight then,” Finn said and nudged Poe’s elbow. “We’ll talk.” Poe nodded, offering a smile that didn’t reach his eyes and certainly didn’t last long enough to leave an impression before he left to go throw a few wrenches at his X-Wing to let out some frustration, BB-8 not far behind.

BB-8 seemed to always follow Poe when it really came down to it. And when he did, he did it eagerly. That little rollie had certainly proved himself capable. It got Finn wondering where their other little roller was. After cleaning up the mess they’d made, ‘they’ mostly being Poe, Finn set out to Find D-O to occupy some of the time between then until dinner. Finn wondered about dinner. He wondered if Kes would even bother with a sit-down dinner with an awkward tension between him and Poe now. Maybe they would just have leftovers.

Either way, Finn did not want to approach Kes or Poe while they were so tense. He figured they both needed time alone. He’d wait until they were ready.

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**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Again, if you want to know when I am planning on updating, please visit this link (and bookmark it;)) Or click the hyperlink just above the notes in the chapter.
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> https://sites.google.com/view/r-robinsnest/home
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> Thanks for reading!


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I will now be updating on Sundays and Wednesdays for the remainder of the fic.

Finn did what he could to occupy himself. He found D-O exploring outside and decided to leave the droid to their own devices and return to the house. He ended up cleaning the kitchen a lot more than he probably should have but he enjoyed cleaning for some reason. Maybe that was something that the First Order had ingrained into him, being orderly and neat. Though, unlike many of the traits he could’ve gotten from the First Order, he couldn’t see how that one was so bad.

He took a trip to the fresher, tidying up in there as well. He tried to avoid messing with Kes’s things. But he went ham on all of the stuff Poe had left lying around. He even straightened out the bathmat before exiting and standing in the hallway, wondering what to do with himself next.

He felt it again. That feeling that something was calling him. His gaze wandered to his left out the transparisteel door. It was that tree again. A large brown trunk, just outside the hangar. Its leaves were a dark green color but they felt bright. If Finn squinted he swore he could see a blue haze around it. It didn’t make any sense why a tree was calling him. Finn just couldn’t find any reason behind it so he chose to ignore it again.

He walked into the room he and Poe were staying in and decided to tackle it. Sure, he could rest but it just didn’t feel right. Resting never really felt right. But doing something, anything, made him feel better.

So he made the bed, placing the picture of Poe’s mother back in the closet and neatly tucking a few things that had tumbled out earlier back in so it would slide closed smoothly. He remembered not to sit on the bed or else he may never get off of it again. And he made his way over to their bags.

It was easy to tell who’s bag was whose. Finn’s was smaller and always packed neatly. Poe’s was mostly empty because his things were either on the floor next to it or were on the floor in the fresher before Finn picked them up. Finn had been sharing a tent with Poe for over a year so he was used to it. But he still couldn’t resist tidying it up a bit.

He picked up the clothes on the floor and started folding them. They probably needed to be thrown in the wash but Finn was so used to living like he was in the Resistance that it didn’t even cross his mind. He straightened the satchel out to stuff the clothes in. That’s when he heard the clank of something landing on the floor and rolling underneath the bench.

Finn got on his knees to reach under and fetch it: Poe’s medication.

...Poe’s medication.

Finn knew he should just put the bottle back. But he was curious. He’d asked Poe about it and Poe had sidestepped the question. And what if it really was making Poe sick? Finn had to check because he was worried about Poe. That’s all.

He read the side label. There was no name on it, not even a doctor’s signature, meaning it hadn’t been prescribed. He read the name of the substance: Hydrodescan. Finn had never heard of that before. Then again, he wasn’t familiar with very many medications. He wished he knew what it was for but it didn’t say that on the bottle.

Finn shook it. It did sound fairly empty. He popped the lid open and peered inside. There were about seven little, oval white capsules. Finn wasn’t sure why exactly but he sniffed it. It had no smell.

What was Hydrodescan?

Finn knew of one way he could find out. He’d help Dr. Kalonia with inventory a few times when they were short-handed. He reached in his satchel and fished out his datapad and took a seat on the bench. With his datapad in one hand and Poe’s medication in the other, he typed out the name of the drug and began his research.

To his relief, Hydrodescan was a non-addictive substance. It was a drug designed to suppress certain hormones and was meant as a means of preventing mood swings triggered by hormones. Finn would read more in-depth studies on that later. Right then, he was more concerned about what the data page said next:

Not safe for humans.

Finn was torn between being worried about Poe or mad at Poe for being so stupid. Did he know this medication wasn’t safe for him and still take it anyways? Or was he just oblivious to its harmful nature? He wasn’t sure which was better.

Finn’s immediate thought is to flush the last seven of them down the lavatory. But Poe took them for a reason. Surely there was something else Poe could take that was safer.

He ended up laying down in bed reading all about this medication and why people took it and about some studies associated with it and why it was deemed unsafe for humans. Finn found himself somewhat relieved to find out that long term use could cause problems with protein synthesis, namely animal proteins. With prolonged use, symptoms progressively get worse.

Finn had a feeling before that maybe it was Poe’s medication making him sick. But now he was sure. It had to be Poe’s medication. That meant there was a chance they could do something to help him get better, and if nothing else, to help him keep from getting worse.

* * *

  
Finn startled awake. Poe was hovering over him, shaking his wrist to wake him. He’d fallen asleep while reading the datapad. Finn sat up and looked around the room. He was a bit worried that maybe he’d fallen asleep holding Poe’s medication. That would’ve given away his snooping. But no. He’s just fallen asleep with the datapad on his face. Poe’s medication was sitting on the bedside table.

“Hey,” Poe said. He seemed to be in a better mood than before already. “Good nap?” He sat on the bed next to Finn.

“Yeah, I guess,” Finn said. “I didn’t mean to fall asleep. How long was I out?”

“Not sure. When did you get in bed?” Poe asked. Poe’s hair was wet. He was wearing fresh clothes. In fact, he was wearing clothes that Finn hadn’t seen him in. He must’ve found some of his old clothes or something. He smelled of something fruity and sweet.

Finn smiled. “You showered.”

Poe shrugged, nudging Finn’s shoulder with his. “Figured the General would want me to after the way you scolded me today.”

Finn put his hand in Poe’s wet hair and shook it around. “You better if we have to share a bed.” They both chuckled. Finn sniffed his hand. That smell was familiar. “Does everything smell like Koyos around here?”

Poe looked at Finn, his eyebrows raised slightly and biting the inside of his lip. “It’s kinda hard to get rid of the oil smell. My mom always had a hard time getting it out of her hair. She developed an extract from the fruit to add to soap… I may have added more than I was supposed to but I think we can agree that I smelled really bad today.”

Finn chuckled. “Yeah. You did,” Finn agreed. “You’re mom was pretty clever.” Poe fondly clutched his necklace, the necklace she’d said was for his partner, at the mention of his mother again. She was clever. But had she known Poe wouldn’t want to give it away even if it was for Finn? Finn leaned towards Poe and sniffed. “You smell really good.” Poe laughed. “I think I’m hungry,” Finn admitted and Poe laughed harder.

“You’re always hungry,” Poe said, grabbing Finn’s hand and tugging him until they were both on their feet. Poe let the thought of giving away her necklace slip away for the evening. Even if Poe wasn’t ready to give away a piece of his mother, he was certain that Finn was that partner she’d warned him about. And he wanted to spend the evening enjoying Finn’s company. “Come on. The sun is about to set and I want you to see it.”

Finn let Poe drag him through the outside door in their bedroom. Finn was shocked at how much the forest and plants around them were already glowing. He didn’t have enough time to take it in though because Poe was pulling him around the side of the house and up the porch. There was easier access to the roof of the lower part of the house with the bedrooms.

A short ladder would take them to the roof. It was covered in climbing ferns. They had a subtle shine to them, glowing a dim green, blue color. Poe climbed up the ladder and Finn followed suit and climbed up onto the roof. Just below them was the room they were sleeping in. Finn was immediately intrigued by the view of the whole property just from here alone. He could see the entire forest around them and even the Koyo orchards.

“Come sit down,” Poe’s voice pulled him out of his trance.

Finn looked towards Poe. He was sitting on a blanket. The entire roof was covered in those glowing climbing ferns so the blanket was on top of that. Behind him were a few more blankets and two pillows and a few food containers. Poe had definitely raided the conservator before taking Finn up there.

Finn walked over and sat down next to Poe. “You got all this done ahead of time. What are you up to, Poe Dameron?”

“I’m not up to anything,” Poe insisted. “I told you we’d watch the stars tonight, didn’t I?”

“Hm,” Finn hummed skeptically. He began counting on his fingers. “You showered and used special extract in your shampoo so you would smell extra nice. You wore fresh, clean clothes. You brought out all these blankets and the food. You did it all ahead of time. And then you came and woke me up just in time to watch the sunset.” Poe had a sheepish look on his face. “If I didn’t know any better, I’d say you were trying to romance me.”

Poe’s sheepish look somehow effortlessly morphed into one of smugness. “Is it working?”

Finn shrugged, trying to be nonchalant about it. “It might be working a little bit…” He looked at Poe to find a slightly fallen expression. “Jokes on you because you had me at ‘I can fly anything’.”

“Ha! No. I didn’t,” Poe said as he laughed.

“You’re right,” Finn said. “I had no idea back then. You were my first real friend and then you died ten minutes after I met you.”

“Yeah. And you went and forgot all about me while you and Rey-”

“I didn’t forget you,” Finn said, smacking him on the chest. “When are you going to stop being jealous of Rey?”

“Shshshsh,” Poe hissed, turning his attention away from Finn and pointed towards the sunset. “We’re missing the sunset.”

“Don’t try and change the…” Finn trailed off as he watched the sunset. Every color that Finn had ever seen was visible from this spot. The giant red orb covered only a fourth of the sky at that moment, casting a red color onto everything on its fourth moon. The sun burned bright yellow, casting orange and pink onto the clouds as it set. The sky crescendoed into a deep, dark blue with speckles of twinkly white stars starting to appear as the sun was almost set. Under the green forest canopy, bioluminescent plants glowed shades of neon. And if Finn looked for it, he could see the iridescent purple of the Massassi tree bark.

Finn didn’t have any words for it.

“It’s pretty incredible, isn’t it?” Poe asked.

All Finn managed was a hum. That was it until the last bit of sunshine tucked itself behind the middle of two mountain peaks. Finn turned and looked at Poe, still in shock. “This place is amazing and I never want to leave.”

“It’s better with you here so I hope you never do,” Poe replies, smiling at Finn as he leans back to grab the containers of food. He sets them down in front of Finn. He sure knew the way to the man’s heart. “So… what do you want to eat?”

“What is there?”

“Today’s lunch, yesterday’s dinner, and some soup from the other day that I’m pretty sure has bacon in it so I’m not going to eat,” Poe listed. 

“All of it,” Finn said.

“I had a feeling you would say that. You just have to share something with me. Oh!” He reached behind him to grab a blue, resealable bag and present it to Finn. “Dessert. For after.”

Finn held the package to read it. On the front was a picture of thin little black cookies with something white on the inside. He looked at Poe skeptically. “Can you eat these?”

Poe nodded. “They’re a plant-based company. To be honest, I’m tempted to just eat them for dinner. I haven’t had them in a long time and they’re my favorite.”

Finn squinted at him. “Mm. You need to eat some real food first.” Finn popped the lid off of the soup container and brought it up to his nose. Whatever it was, it was creamy and smelled delicious. He took the spoon that Poe was holding out to him and almost dug in. “Wait. What about your dad?”

“He already ate,” Poe assured him. “He had some of last night’s stir fry. He told me to offer you the soup and to try and get the rest of the leftovers eaten up before tomorrow. He’s gonna make a run into town to stock up the conservator.”

Finn slurped down a bite. It was creamy and savory and thick and chunky and there was nothing wrong with it. “Mm. It’s good.”

Finn and Poe finished off the last of the leftovers. They talked and joked around casually and comfortably while they ate. Poe teased Finn a lot for his weird food mixing experiments. He ended up adding some of the other leftovers to the soup and claimed it was as good as all three meals combined, even cold.

Finally, after some time, they set the empty food containers aside and just sat. The forest was really glowing now. Finn took a closer look at the bioluminescent climbing ferns that were all over the flat roof, breaking a leaf from the plant. It fascinated him. Everything about this place fascinated him.

Poe rolled around on the blanket, laying out the pillows and grabbing the extra blankets to throw over himself. He laid on his back and looked up at the stars. Finn looked up and the view sent him to his back too. “Fascinating.”

“Mhm,” Poe wrestled with his blanket and offered some to Finn. “Blanket?”

“Sure,” Finn said, making himself cozy under the covers. “Are we sleeping out here then?”

“Only if you want to,” Poe said. “Do you want to?”

“I’ll give it a shot,” Finn said. He turned and looked at Poe who was smiling at him, laying on his side. “I kinda just woke up from a nap so I might not be that tired.” Poe huffed a bit of laughter out but didn’t say anything.

It had been a while since the incident at lunch. And Poe and Kes had had some time to themselves to cool off. Finn felt like maybe now was an okay time to ask about it. “Can I ask you a question?”

“Shoot,” Poe said.

“At lunch today… you and your dad…” Now Finn didn’t really know how to ask the question. Or what question to ask. “What’s the deal with the other house?” 

Poe blinked and held his breath for a second. He turned and laid on his back and sighed heavily, gazing up at the stars as if they held some kind of answer for all his problems. 

Finn seemed to take that the wrong way and tried to retract his question. “You don’t have to talk about it if you don’t want to-”

“No. No, it’s fine, Finn,” Poe said. “I can talk about it.” But he didn’t. At least not right away. He reached over and grabbed that blue, plastic bag to unseal. Poe reached in and pulled out a small black disk and put it in his mouth. For a moment, the only sounds to be heard were of Poe crunching on the cookie and crinkling the bag to offer some to Finn. Of course, the ambiance of the forest was omnipresent, almost like a white noise. “Cookie?” Poe offered.

Finn hoped Poe wasn’t dodging the question by offering him more food. He took the thin black disk and broke it in half, surprised to find a thin layer of white frosting on the inside. It was kind of shocking to find something like that inside a cookie so small. He put one half in his mouth: sweet, crunchy, and a slightly bitter taste of chocolate. Finn was wholeheartedly impressed. Something so small and simple was so uplifting and delicious.

“It was my grandfather’s house,” Poe finally said after having eaten a few cookies. “My mom’s dad. He took care of me for the first few years of my life because my parents were still in the rebellion so I actually lived in one of the bedrooms in that house until they returned.”

Finn is pretty sure he’s heard some of this before. He knew Poe’s grandfather had raised him during his formative years while his parents were busy fighting a war. He didn’t realize that they had two houses though. That didn’t really seem like an important detail.

“When my mom died, all of her things ended up in his house, locked away in the back bedroom. None of us wanted to go through any of her things and get rid of anything,” Poe explained. Though, he was only eight at the time so he was hardly expected to take on that responsibility. “Then my grandfather died and my uncle L’ulo moved in. L’ulo and I moved all of his things to the back room with my mom’s things. My dad didn’t want to step foot in either of those rooms so we had to do it…”

Finn could tell that Poe’s voice was starting to get a little tight and he was talking slower. “I didn’t mind it. It was actually nice getting to see all of my grandfather’s things and remember him… I still miss him. Even going through some of my mom’s old things with L’ulo was nice. They were really good friends in the rebellion so he told me a lot of stories.” Poe smiled fondly at some of the memories he’d had in that room, reminiscing with his uncle.

“So was your uncle from your dad’s side?” Finn asked.

“Hm?” Poe turned and looked at him. He’d kind of drifted off a bit.

“You’re uncle. How was he related?”

“Oh. No, we weren’t related,” Poe explained. “L’ulo was a Duros. No. He wasn’t my biological uncle. He was just family. Ya know? He helped raise me. I just always called him my uncle.”

“Ooooh,” Finn said. “That makes sense.”

“I forget that you never knew him,” Poe admitted. “He was part of Black Squadron. I was technically his commanding officer so I had to give his eulogy. There’s a saying among pilots that we vanish just as the Jedi did but we’re never really gone. That’s what L’ulo did. One minute he was there and the next that was it…”

Finn found Poe’s hand under the blankets and held it. “I’m sorry.”

“Me too,” he said. He sighed heavily. “I still miss him.”

Finn let Poe have a moment of silence. He knew L’ulo died when things were really picking up as far as for the fight against the First Order. Poe probably didn’t have much time to grieve his uncle’s death. He wondered if Poe had to call Kes and tell him… if he even got to.

“So your mom’s stuff is in there… your grandfather’s things are in there…?”

“And my uncle’s,” Poe confirmed. “My dad hasn’t stepped foot in the house in years. JayZee and Maury only go in there for upkeep and to keep rodents and bugs out. My dad doesn’t want to touch that place. I don’t think he wants anyone to.”

“What do you want?” Finn asked.

Poe was silent for another moment, sighing. “I know it’s going to be hard but I just want to let go. It seems like a waste having that perfectly good house just sitting there full of useless junk. Let me tell you, it’s useless. My dad is holding onto it because he thinks if he doesn’t he’ll forget them. But I never had any of those things and I always remember them. You don’t just forget people like that because you don’t have physical pieces of them to hide away in a room you never enter. They become a part of you.”

Finn never had family like that to lose. The only person he could think of that he’d lost was Leia. Leia became someone he’d looked up to, someone he cherished. When she died, he felt it. But he could still feel her sometimes. He knew she was still there. He wasn’t sure if it was just the force or if Leia had become a part of him in the way Poe was saying his loved ones had become a part of him. Either way, Finn felt like he could understand where Poe was coming from. The sentiment was inside of the person, not the things. “You want to go through all that stuff,” Finn concluded.

“I don’t see the point in hoarding all those things for the sake of sentiment if they’re just going to sit in a room and rot and collect dust,” Poe said. “I’ve tried to talk to my dad about it before but every time I bring it up he gets defensive and all I want is to help. And yeah. Maybe I want to control the situation but, in my defense, the situation is already out of control-”

“It makes sense, Poe. You don’t have to justify it,” Finn assured Poe. “I think you’re right. I think your dad needs to work on letting go of those things… but do you ever wonder if maybe he was holding onto those things because it was all he had? You’re all he has left of that family,” Finn explained. He hoped what he was saying held importance to Poe.

Poe wished he’d thought of that. It may have crossed his mind at one point. But he never had the time to actually think about it or talk about it. “You mean because I keep leaving him behind?”

Finn wasn’t so sure about that but… “Would that be a good reason to want to hold on?” Poe didn’t respond. He just thought. “Maybe he’s afraid you’re going to leave again. And whenever you leave there is always a possibility that you’ll never come back. Maybe he needs reassurance that you’re here more indefinitely than you have been in the past, that you’re not about to go out there and die.”

It still felt weird to Poe that he could very well be staying on this moon for years to come. “But what if I’m needed?”

“Then your dad will have to understand that,” Finn replied. “But, other than that, you’re probably here for good, right?”

Poe reached into the blue bag and grabbed a cookie to eat. “I don’t know.” Poe crunched on the cookie. “What about you? Are you gonna stay here? For good, I mean.” Poe asked the question casually, as if it was going to determine where Poe stood on his own question. Realistically, Poe would probably follow Finn if he went anywhere else. But, fortunately for him, Finn would also follow him wherever he went.

Finn almost laughed at Poe’s question. Where else would he go? Finn loved this place. Yes. Poe was here and that played a very large factor into why Finn wanted to be there but there was just something about it that called Finn there. “I think I am actually,” Finn admitted out loud, a smile on his face. “This might sound crazy but I feel like this is where I belong. Something is calling me here. I feel it…” Finn tried to explain. He sat up on his elbow and faced Poe. “I think it’s the force.”

Poe sat up and leaned on his elbow too. He glanced behind him with his eyebrows raised. He cleared his throat. Something seemed a little strange about him. “Let me guess. It’s that tree over there,” he said, almost as if it was a joke. But he gestured to the tree behind them that was glowing a bright blue, brighter than any of the other plants in the forest.

Finn couldn’t believe it. Poe must be joking. “What’s that tree?” he asked. “How did you know? I keep feeling it-”

“It’s force sensitive,” Poe explained. “It likes you.”

Finn blinked. This was one of those moments when Finn wasn’t sure if Poe was joking or being serious. He sputtered. “Force-sensitive?” he asked in an unreasonably high voice. “A tree? Can they do that?”

Poe laughed at Finn’s disbelief. Sometimes Finn was too adorable not to laugh at. He always hoped Finn never took it the wrong way. Poe loved it. “Yeah. It was a gift from Luke Skywalker-Did I seriously never tell you about the tree? Man, I guess we’ve been pretty busy this last year.”

“I think I would remember a force-sensitive tree, Poe,” Finn exclaimed. “A gift from Luke Skywalker? Do you guys really go that far back with the Skywalkers?”

Poe shrugged and picked at his teeth nonchalantly. “Eh. My mom might have flown Leia around and helped Luke with a few missions. One of which involved saving a force tree with Luke. As a thank you, he gifted my mother with the tree-well, part of it. It kind of blew up into pieces so she got half of a tree sapling.”

“Hm. I guess you’re really not the Han Solo of this war story,” Finn said, smiling at Poe thoughtfully. “You’re the Shara Dameron.”

“Bey,” Poe corrected. “Her surname was Bey. And I don’t think I deserve that title. At one time, I probably thought so. Just like at one time I really thought I deserved to be the General of the Resistance.” Poe sighed. “I used to be a real idiot.”

“Used to?” Finn teased, effortlessly.

Poe huffed and punched Finn in the chest, his hand getting caught by Finn’s. “Ok. I can still be an idiot. I am an idiot. You know what? I take that back. I’m not an idiot. I’m just constantly learning from my mistakes. I don’t repeat them…” Finn laughed, the laughter seeming to move through his whole body as he held onto Poe’s hand. “Intentionally,” Poe added for good measure and they both laughed out loud.

Finn stroked Poe’s hand with his thumb affectionately as they watched each other in the dim light of the night. There was a red glow coming from the refracting light of the sun onto Yavin. From all other angles were blue, green colors coming from plants, the ones on the roof with them, and even the force tree over by the hangar. 

“I think everyone is always learning from their mistakes,” Finn said quietly. “It doesn’t matter how old we get. No one is perfect. It’s those imperfections that make us individuals.”

Poe hummed thoughtfully. He looked down at their hands. It’s like they were dancing; their fingers were dancing. It almost felt like deja vu. They’ve done this before. Finn was so gentle and so reasonable. How could someone like so come from where he did? “I don’t know, Finn. I think you’re pretty perfect.” Poe said that because, to him, Finn was perfect - flawless.

Finn shook his head subtly. “I’m not.”

Poe didn’t agree. “I think so,” Poe said. “You’re certainly wise beyond your years. That’s for sure.”

Finn smiled and chuckled. “Well, I kind of need to be since you’re so immature for your age,” Finn teased.

“Shut up,” Poe whined, pushing Finn’s hand backward to smack him on the chest. “I take that back. You’re mean. I’m going to sleep.”

Finn rolled his eyes dramatically. “Soooo mature.” Poe flopped around, trying to get comfortable before laying on his back. “Don’t lay on your back. You snore when you-”

“Well there’s a plant under my hip-” Poe argued, flipping to lay on his side. He huffed. “It digs in-” Poe made a pathetic sound when Finn suddenly grabbed him by the hip and pulled him closer. He blinked at Finn in surprise. They were certainly a lot closer now. “Hi.”

“Hi,” Finn said softly. They could feel each other’s breath on their faces. “Better?” he asked Poe. Poe chewed on the inside of his lip, trying not to breathe. He nodded. “Good.”

It took Poe a second to accept that they were officially cuddling again like they had that morning. He let out a breath and reached up to grab and pull his pillow closer before settling in. “Goodnight, Finn.”

Finn couldn’t help but think about all the things he needed to do before he went to sleep, the things he routinely did before bed. But he pushed that aside for the time being. He and Poe were having a moment. He thought he’d let this one last longer than the one they’d shared that morning. “Night, Poe.”


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Finn confronts Poe about the medication.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you did not get the memo, I am now updating this fic every Sunday and Wednesday.

Finn did not sleep that great. Poe moved around a lot and ended up snoring a few times and there was just so much around to look at. He got distracted a lot. He also needed to pee. But he knew that the second he got up, Poe would be grumbling at him. Unfortunately, Finn’s bladder could not wait forever and he was starting to get restless.

Finn got up to go get ready for the day ahead of them. Poe wasn’t nearly ready since he hadn’t taken a nap or rested at all the day before. So Finn let him be. He was a grown man. He would get up eventually.

Poe hardly registered Finn leaving at first. He heard the movement and grumbled before dozing back into a light sleep. Only when he felt light trying to break through his eyelids and rolled over to try and hide from it did he discover just how absent Finn was from the space he’d occupied all night.

He laid there for a while until the loneliness got to him and he finally got up. He hadn’t noticed that Finn had taken down all the dirty dishes and the blankets and pillows that weren’t being used by Poe.

When he entered the house, Finn was exiting the refresher with a plume of steam behind him and his dad was in the kitchen cooking up some breakfast. Poe certainly found steamy Finn more interesting. He just stood there admiring Finn’s chest and those arms.  _ Eyes, Poe. He has Eyes. _

“Look who finally came down,” Finn said, greeting Poe warmly with that flawless smile of his. “Was wondering if those woolamanders had gotten to you or something.”

Poe rolled his eyes, partly because of the remark but also because it helped him take his eyes off of Finn for a second. “It’s not that late.” The sleep was still heavy in Poe’s voice. He sighed. “I’m gonna freshen up.”

“Breakfast is ready,” Kes called from the kitchen. “Come eat up.” The old man carried a steaming pan of something to the table. Finn strode over to the table to peak at the food. There was a plate of some kind of pancake with berries in them and in the pan was steaming hot patties of something. “Wasaka berry pancakes and veggie patties.”

“Oh no way,” Finn said, taking a seat at the bench. “Chewy always talked about Wasaka berries. I’ve never had them before.” Finn didn’t hesitate to start digging in.

“Poe, are you going to eat while it’s hot?” Kes asked his son, seeing him standing near the entryway of the home still laden with sleep.

Poe contemplated. He didn’t care that much about the food. Yes, pancakes were great. Especially his dad’s pancakes. But he wasn’t that hungry. He’d eaten a big dinner. And had a lot of cookies. But the view he’d get with his meal… 

“Yeah. Might as well,” Poe said, walking over to the table, sitting opposite Finn. He really appreciated that he was not wearing a shirt. Poe had a single pancake. He dipped it in the massassi syrup, purple of course, and ate it slowly and lazily as Finn happily ate his and made conversation with Kes. Poe didn’t know what they were talking about. He was too busy admiring his view.

“I’m gonna go get dressed,” Finn said once he’d had his fill of breakfast. He stood up and left. Poe admired that view too. But as soon as Finn was out of his view, he lost all interest in consuming his single pancake. When Kes laughed at him, he threw his pancake at his dad before getting up to get in the fresher himself.

* * *

Finn had gotten dressed while Poe had made off for the fresher. He was officially at the point in the day where he didn’t know what to do with himself. There was nothing he was aware of that needed to be done. And there was no one barking orders at him. He felt a bit lost.

Now it was just a waiting game, waiting for Poe to get out of the refresher so he could figure out what they’re doing today. He remembered Poe mention that his father would run into town to restock the conservator. Were they going with him? Would they be alone for most of the day? Either way, Finn was looking forward to the day.

Finn sat on the bed and sighed. He’d wait for Poe. He tapped his finger on his knee and let his gaze wander and his mind with it until they landed on a familiar bottle of pills. Finn felt a ping of guilt. He shouldn’t have gone behind Poe’s back to research the way he did. But all of the information he’d learned came flooding back into his mind.

He needed to talk to Poe. He grabbed the bottle and looked at it as if it held the answer to every problem in the galaxy. Should he talk to Poe? Finn laid back against the cloudlike pillows and held the bottle in his hands for a moment, reading the label again. If he didn’t talk to Poe, that would be morally wrong. He at least needed to tell Poe that he’d gone behind his back and apologize. He would do that.

What Finn really wanted to talk to Poe about was why he was taking the medication and about the dangers that came with it. What Finn really wanted to do was make sure it wasn’t what was making Poe get sick.

“I need to talk to him,” he said out loud. That would solidify it for him. He had to talk to Poe.

* * *

When Poe got out of the fresher, he walked around the room, back and forth between his bag and his closet, grabbing shirts and belts and pants and socks. It almost seemed like he was in a hurry as he tried to hop around putting his socks on. Finn even asked if he was and Poe had to take a second to breathe because he wasn’t. He had nowhere to be. It just felt so normal to rush in the morning.

Poe finished getting dressed but he was still looking for something. He searched his bag. He looked under the bench, under the bed. He couldn’t find it. “Hey, have you seen my-”

“Hydrosecan?” Finn asked, holding up the bottle from where he casually lay on the bed.

Poe blinked. “Yeah.” He reached for it but Finn swiftly moved it out of his reach. Poe looked him in the eyes and tried to gauge him. “What are you doing? I need to take my medication?”

This is the part where Finn wanted to blatantly tell Poe that his medication was making him sick. It had to be. But he took a deep breath and admitted, “We need to talk, Poe.”

Poe slumped a little bit, feeling a little anxious. “About what?”

“Yesterday…” Finn started as he sat up on the bed and faced Poe. “When you got sick, it was after you’d taken your medication. I kinda mentioned that it could be the reason you were getting sick…”

Poe hooked his thumb on a belt loop of his pants and stood there, trying not to look too vulnerable. “I remember,” he said rubbing his nose.

“I did some research on it yesterday,” Finn said.

Poe bit his lips and closed his eyes. He knew what that meant. “So you know why I take them,” he concluded. He shook his head, feeling a wave of hot anger punch him in the chest. “You know? I was this close to telling you on my own-”

“Poe,” Finn said, putting a gentle hand up to silence him. “I know I shouldn’t have done it, not without talking to you. I’m sorry.”

Poe sighed. He felt angry. He wasn’t exactly sure why. Maybe because he was insecure about… being the way he was. He shouldn’t be. He swore he wasn’t. But maybe he was on some level. He turned around and plopped on the bed, covering his face with his hands.

Finn decided to give Poe a moment. He deserved it. He was allowed to be mad at him for going behind his back. He also needed a moment to think about how to tell Poe that he knew the medication was unsafe.

“It’s normal,” Poe said, with no further explanation.

It piqued Finn’s curiosity. It wasn’t the response he’d been expecting. “What?”

“The heat cycle,” Poe said flatly.

Finn furrowed his brows. He laid down on the bed next to Poe, looking at him curiously. “Huh?”

“It’s still technically there but I don’t feel it that much,” Poe tried to explain without really explaining. He looked at Finn for a reaction but he was only getting one vibe from him: lost. “I can get pregnant, Finn.”

Finn’s eyes told of his shock and disbelief. “Wha-” Finn snapped his mouth closed. He laughed. “Funny. Very funny, Poe. I’m trying to have a serious conversation here. I’m generally concerned about your well being-”

“I’m serious,” Poe reiterated. “My mom came from a near-human subspecies that had hermaphroditic tendencies. I have a heat cycle in which I kinda… go back and forth.” Poe continued to look at Finn’s disbelieving stare. Yeah. Of course, Finn wouldn’t believe him. He sighed. “When I first started having heat cycles I had really violent mood swings so my dad took me to a doctor. That’s why I take the medication.”

Finn’s disbelieving look turned into one of slight horror and concern. “Wait… you’re not joking. You… wow.” Finn blinked at Poe blankly before smiling at him. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

“Because it’s an awkward conversation,” Poe said defensively. “When am I supposed to bring that up?”

“Two years, Poe,” Finn said. “You had two years worth of opportunities to mention something about it.”

“Why? It’s not that big of a-”

“Because I want to know things about you, Poe,” Finn said. “I want to know you and I want you to tell me things.” They stared at each other for a tense moment before Poe sighed, nonverbally admitting that maybe he could have mentioned it at some point by nodding. “How old were you?” Finn asked.

Poe shrugged. “Fourteen, fifteen maybe. Why?”

“So around the same time you started having problems with meat?” Finn asked, hoping Poe would see where he was going with this. “And you’ve been taking the same medication for twenty years.” Poe had an ‘oh shit’ look on his face. “Yeah. That research I did was more about the side effects for long term use than it was the reason you could be taking it.”

“I’m an idiot.”

“I don’t understand how you’ve even been getting it. Doctors don’t prescribe it anymore,” Finn said, sounding confused. 

Poe shrugged sheepishly. “Well, I mean, I learned a few too many things when I was spice running…”

Finn raised an eyebrow at Poe before chuckling. “Of course, you did.”

“You really think it’s my medication?” Poe asked, a hint of doubt in his tone as he sat up.

“It was usually only prescribed for short term use,” Finn said, sitting up with Poe. “So I’m not entirely sure why you ever ended up with the impression that you needed to take it for the next twenty years… but, regardless, you should stop taking it. I want to show you some of the research I found-”

“No, it’s ok. I don’t feel like reading,” Poe said. “I trust you.”

“There are other medications out there that are safer,” Finn said.

Poe shook his head. “I don’t really want to think about that right now.”

“Ok,” Finn said. “But if it’s that important to you-”

“I don’t know. How well do you put up with mood swings?” Poe asked.

“I put up with you most of the time, don’t I?”

Poe sighed and closed his eyes. “Yeah. Yep. You sure do.” Poe sat up and patted Finn on the knee. “Thanks for looking out for me, Finn.”

Finn sat up with him. He held back a smile but he knew Poe could see it anyways. “Someone has to,” Finn said. He may have somewhat passive-aggressively looked down at the floor and mumbled, “Cause you sure don’t.”

Poe heard it. Though he wasn’t really upset by it. He knew it was somewhat true. He wasn’t always that great at taking care of himself. He usually surrounded himself with people that would get after him for not doing that. Like his dad. Like Leia.

Finn felt a lot like Leia to Poe. Maybe that’s why he loved him so much.

“Come on,” Poe said, standing up and offering a hand to Finn. “We’re going into town with my dad. I wanted to show you around.”

Finn looked up at Poe, surprised Poe didn’t react to his comment. Not that he was looking to get and rise out of him. So they were going into town. He was okay with that. Though when he looked down at the pill bottle in his hands he paused. He shook it and presented it to Poe. “What do we do with this?”

Poe took it from Finn’s hand and looked at it skeptically. Yes. He believed Finn. Finn had proved his ability to research things with integrity and he wasn’t a liar by any standard that was for sure. But he still wanted to see with his own eyes how incredibly stupid he was. “Give me the datapad.” Poe didn’t do nearly as much reading as Finn had but what he did read lead him to spout a few expletives in frustration. “Ok. But, in my defense,” Poe started. “There are a lot of bad drugs out there and, as far as I knew, this one was safe so I wanted to stick with it.”

“Not anymore,” Finn argued.

“Not anymore,” Poe assured him.

“So?”

“So…” Poe said, tossing the datapad on the bed and dragging Finn by the hand to the fresher. Poe popped the lid of the bottle and dumped the pills in the toilet before flushing them. He looked at Finn and shrugged. “Happy?”

Finn took the empty bottle from Poe’s hand and tossed it in the trash next to the sink. “I don’t know. Are you?”

Poe just sighed. “I hope you’re right about this.”

Finn suddenly looked very smug. “Come on. You know I’m right. You’re just upset that I fixed your problem so easily.”

Poe huffed as he pushed past Finn towards the doorway. “We’ll be waiting for you out in the speeder, Pal.”

“I’m right behind you.”

[ Update Schedule ](https://sites.google.com/view/r-robinsnest/home)


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you did not get the memo, I update on Sundays and Wednesdays!

The streets bustled with people of all varieties. They popped between colorful tents and shacks owned by street vendors. Some of which sold produce. Some sold tools. Others sold little trinkets or clothing. Some sold fresh desserts. Others cooked meals right in front of their customers.

Poe and Finn offered to help Kes but Kes knew Poe was dying to visit some of his favorite markets. He waved them off, hoping their time alone with each other would help spur on their relationship.

Poe dragged Finn along the narrow street until they reached a little hole-in-the-wall shack. They ducked into the entrance. It appeared to be a cantina of some kind, much larger on the inside than it appeared on the out.

“Well, if it isn’t the General of the Resistance,” a hefty voice called from behind the serving counter, a large woman of some other species. She was fairly round in shape overall. Other than that, her snout was her most distinguishable feature, large, round, and flat. Finn felt several pairs of eyes on the two of them. He was immediately uncomfortable. “Was beginning to think you’d never show up,” she told Poe as the cantina continued to bustle.

Poe walked them up to the counter. “Hey, Ursa. You know me: always looking for my next adventure.” He ushered Finn into a seat before taking one himself.

“So what brings you here then, huh?” Ursa asked. She has a subtle accent that made her speech more pronounced than others. “You’re not looking for any trouble, are you?”

Poe laughed. “Oh. No. No trouble here. I’m just showing Finn around. He’s not a native.”

“Oh!” Ursa looked at Finn suggestively. “A lover?”

Poe couldn’t confirm nor deny that without giving someone the wrong impression. So he didn’t do either. “Finn is the General of the Resistance,” Poe explained.

“Co-general,” Finn corrected. “ _ Was _ co-general,” he corrected further. Technically, neither of them were generals anymore.

“Once a General, always a General,” Ursa told Finn.

“Finn, this is Ursa. She runs the best joint in town. Need a bite to eat? She’s got it. Need a drink? She’s got it. Need to vent about your daddy issues? She’s all ears,” Poe listed.

Ursa chuckled. “Oh. I know all about Poe’s woes.” She rest her elbow on the bar and looked at them. “So. What can I get you, Generals? It’s never too early for a cocktail.”

“Sure. I’ll take something light and fruity. And it’s been a while since I’ve had any of your fried greens.”

“One Pink Passion and a plate of greens coming right up,” Ursa said enthusiastically. She turned to Finn. “What about you, General? How do you feel about Ale?”

Finn smiled. “I’ve had a few here and there,” Finn replied. “Never had a problem with it. Why?”

“What about ice cream?” she questioned further, a mysterious glint in her eyes.

“I do like ice cream,” Finn said.

“Nonono,” Poe interrupted. “You don’t know what ice cream is. That stuff you had on Ajan Kloss? Pft. Sad excuse for an ice cream.” Poe pointed at Ursa with a determined expression. “Fluff?” Poe raised an eyebrow.

Ursa raised an eyebrow of her own. She didn’t really have any eyebrows though. “Fluff?” Her tone was slightly permissive.

“Fluff?” Finn asked, confused.

Ursa and Poe looked at Finn in unison before looking at each other and nodding, both saying, “Fluff.” Ursa left the counter in front of them, determined to get their orders ready, leaving them to themselves.

Finn and Poe looked at each other. “What’s a fluff?” Finn asked.

Poe shrugged nonchalantly. “You’ll see.”

“What were you doing eating ice cream on Ajan Kloss, huh?” Poe suddenly looked guilty. Finn had a deadpan look on his face. “Poe, you knew you weren’t supposed to eat-”

“Ice cream is good!” Poe said defensively. “What? Am I just supposed to deny myself that happiness because it makes me sick?” Finn opened his mouth to reply but Poe stopped him. “Don’t answer that question.”

“I don’t remember you getting sick,” Finn said.

“It wasn’t that bad.”

“Was it worth it?”

“No,” Poe said. “Because it wasn’t even good ice cream. But Ursa’s ice cream? That’s real ice cream. I would die for that ice cream. I might even sneak a few bites from yours-”

“Poe,” Finn chided.

“Just a little taste,” Poe assured him. He leaned closer to Finn, pursing his lower lip and batting his eyelashes. “Please?” Finn pursed his lips and raised his eyebrows, making an incredibly sassy expression. “Come on, General,” Poe teased, poking at Finn’s bicep. “Just a little bit,” Poe promised.

Finn blinked, holding back a smile at Poe’s childish behavior. “I don’t think you’re going to take no for an answer,” Finn admitted begrudgingly. Poe shook his head. “Fine.” Poe grinned in success. “But when you get sick, I won’t feel sorry for you.”

“Heh! Yeah you will,” Poe said.

Finn sighed. “Yeah, I will.”

Ursa was already back with their drink, setting them in front of them. “Drink up, Generals. It’s on the house today,” she said. “I’ll have those greens out in a moment with some dipping sauce.” She disappeared again.

Finn looked down at the large glass of ale in front of him. “So this is a fluff? Ale with ice cream in it?” Finn asked. On the top of the mug, a large swirl of soft ice cream sat, waiting to be pushed down into the ale.

Poe was drinking a sip of his own fruit cocktail when Finn had asked him. There were three layers of pink, each of them blended. The darkest layer was on the bottom, almost blood red. The top layer was a lighter, fluffier looking pink. Poe set down his drink and licked his lips looking at Finn, unaware that there was still a bit of cocktail on his upper lip. Finn was staring at it. “Add ice cream to any drink and it becomes a fluff,” Poe explained. “Ale fluff, wine fluff, whiskey fluff. Or just juice or carbonated beverages. I grew up drinking a lot of fluff. Then milk started making me sick. But everyone deserves-what are you looking at?”

Finn reached up to wipe the pink smudge from Poe’s lip with his thumb. “You’re just a mess,” Finn said fondly. He licked at his thumb, a tangy burst of sweetness tickling his tongue. “Mm. That’s good.”

Poe swooned. Almost. He almost swooned. He was basically swooning. Finn just… Poe was glitching. He blinked, trying to wake himself up. Poe cleared his throat. He opened his mouth but nothing came out.

“Here you go,” Ursa saved him. She set the plate of crispy fried greens in front of him. “Anything else for you?”

Poe propped his chin up using his elbow as a brace against the bar. “Thank you. No. We’re good,” Poe said looking to Finn. “We’re good?” Finn nodded. “Yeah. We’re alright, Ursa. That’ll be it for now.”

“Enjoy,” she told them before moving on to serve her next customers while they ate.

Poe turned to Finn, finally aware of what he had to do. Finn flirted. He had to flirt back. “Alright, buddy. Time to pay up,” Poe said. “You stole a taste of mine. Now I get some of yours.”

“Pft.” Finn shook his head, using the spoon he’d been given to scrape a tiny amount off of the top of his ale fluff. He did not expect Poe to bump his hand, causing him to get a much larger amount than he’d planned to. “Hey!” Finn tried to pull the spoon away before Poe could take it but he failed. Poe’s pilot level reflexes were too good for him.

Poe savored the taste of the sweet, creamy goodness on his tongue. “Mm.” He nodded and pointed to Finn’s drink with the spoon. “Now that is real ice cream.” Poe offered the spoon back to Finn and smiled innocently. “Thanks for sharing.”

Finn shook his head as he snatched the spoon away. “Not going to be sorry,” Finn repeated. Though they both knew he wouldn’t be able to stop himself. He stuffed the spoon into the ice cream and tasted it himself. Now he understood. This was real ice cream. “Oh.”

Poe laughed. “Yeah.”

Finn hummed. “That’s good,” he said as he dug in for more, causing the swirl of ice cream on top to crash into the ale below. He lifted the glass and drank some. So the ale was good too. “Oh,” he said again. “ _ That’s _ good.”

“That’s because it’s local,” Poe said. “Local is always better.” Poe eyed Finn as he drank some of his fruity pink drink. The other man was devouring his ale fluff so eagerly that Poe wished he was that drink. “Well… almost always,” he added when he remembered that Finn was not a local and he was better, better than anything that had ever happened to Poe before.

“What are those?” Finn asked, nodding to the plate of crispy fried greens on his plate.

Poe glanced between them and Finn before grabbing one. “They’re technically a legume. Coated in a batter and fried in oil.” Poe held it up to Finn’s mouth. “You’ll like them.”

Finn looked between Poe and the fried green. “Are you feeding me-mph.” Before Finn could bring his question to a close, Poe stuffed the food in his mouth and silenced him. Finn slowly bit down on the fried vegetable. A burst of something hot and salty ran along his tongue as something crispy crunch against his teeth. Poe kept pushing it towards him so he had to keep taking bites. It’s not like he had a choice in the matter.

So maybe Poe had a thing about Finn and food. Something about Finn eating was just very interesting to him. Interesting was an understatement. Poe had an obsession, an addiction. He couldn’t stop himself from shoving the next green at Finn.

  
“Op.” Finn turned his head away. “Poe, I’m still chewing the first one.”

Poe shrugged, grinning at Finn fondly. “Never stopped you before,” Poe teased. It was true. Finn didn’t always have the best table manners. But Poe didn’t mind. He mischievously kept pushing the greasy green at Finn’s face, smacking him with it.

Finn caught his hand and sent him a look that was supposed to be threatening but Poe just laughed. Finn couldn’t keep a straight face. “Those are good,” Finn said right before taking a bite of the one Poe had tried to shove in his face a moment ago.

“You say that about everything,” Poe pointed out.

“Everything is good,” Finn defended himself. He snatched another green and dipped it in the sauce they’d been given. “I don’t know why I’m always so hungry.”

“It probably has something to do with metabolism,” Poe said. “You’ve gained a lot of muscle recently too. It’s that Jedi training. The force is strong with this one, huh?” Poe smirked as he grabbed Finn’s bicep and squeezed it. Finn barely noticed since he was so interested in the food. “Seriously, Finn. When I first met you, you somehow fit into the standard stormtrooper armour. And now you’re like…” Poe just vaguely gestured at Finn.

Finn furrowed his brows at him. He looked down at his body, confused. “I’m wha-” Finn silenced himself looking back at Poe. “Wait. Are you flirting with me, Poe?”

Poe picked up his drink and sipped at it. “You’re an idiot, Finn.”

“Wha-” Finn looked at Poe absurdly. “How am I supposed to know when you’re flirting and when you’re just being nice? You’re like that with everybody.”

“I squeezed your bicep.”

“You touch me all the time,” Finn argued. “How am I supposed to know-”

“You literally flirted with  _ me  _ two seconds ago,” Poe rebutted. Finn looked at Poe, a completely lost expression on his face. “You did the thing,” Poe said vaguely, sticking his thumb up and waving it at Finn’s face. Finn’s expression immediately changed and Poe deadpanned. “Don’t tell me you flirted on accident.”

Finn turned away from Poe and hid his guilty expression in that large glass of ale and ice cream. He took a long drink and glanced back at Poe, trying not to smile too much. Poe looked slightly red. He beamed at him. “You’re blushing,” Finn teased, reaching up to touch Poe’s cheeks only to get his hand smacked away. Finn looked at Poe sympathetically. “Poe, I can’t flirt on purpose because I don’t know how!”

“Apparently, you don’t even have to try,” Poe said begrudgingly.

Finn watched Poe curiously as the older man finished his pink drink. How had he finished it so fast? Usually Poe was the slower of the two when it came to consumption. Apparently, when it came to flirting, Finn was the slower of the two though. “How long have you been flirting with me?” Finn asked.

Poe shrugged. “Probably since we sat down.”

“No. I mean, how long? Not just today,” Finn corrected. “When did you start intentionally flirting with me?”

Poe huffed. “Oh. I don’t know. Since the beginning,” he said. He looked at Finn. “I flirted the heck out of you when you were unconscious on the Raddus,” Poe admitted. He’d never told Finn that before. “You didn’t seem very interested then but I wrote it off on the fact that you were unconscious.”

Finn squinted at him. “But you’ve been flirting this whole time? Am I really that stupid?”

Poe shrugged. “To be fair, I was very subtle in the beginning. Ya know, lip biting, prolonged, very intense hugs. Remember when I asked you about Rey? And Rose?”

“Which time?” Finn asked.

“The first time,” Poe said. “I asked you about both of them and you said they were both just friends. And I said-”

“‘I can’t keep up with your just friends, man’,” Finn finished for Poe. “Yeah. I remember. I never understood what you meant by that. I guess I kind of get it now.”

“It meant I had a chance with you but you were still fresh out of the First Order then,” Poe said. “As infatuated as I was I didn’t want to make you feel uncomfortable.”

“You never did,” Finn assured Poe. “In fact, you were the one person I could count on to never make me feel that way. You always made me feel like I belonged somewhere.”

Poe and Finn looked at each other. Appreciation and something else passed between them. “I still flirted though. You just had no idea,” Poe said and laughed. Poe beamed at Finn and scrunched up his nose. “You were really cute.”

“Was I now?” Finn asked, fishing for more compliments.

“Mhm,” Poe said. “You know what really sold it for me?”

“What?”

“The tie thing,” Poe said, raising his eyebrows, his eyes slightly glazed over. The alcohol was definitely making him just a little tipsy. Or at least making him not overthink what he was saying. “You remember?”

Finn nodded. They had gone on an undercover mission to Corelia as business partners attending an event. They were secretly searching for a list of names of Resistance Allies that were being held prisoner that had been stolen from the First Order. Finn had thrown a fit trying to tie his tie on his own before finally letting Poe help him.

Poe started laughing as he retold what he remembered. “I just heard a bunch of grunting and a table crashing and then you had this pout on your face.” Poe sputtered. “You were so cute. And so stupid. You had to wear that Rebellion Starbird, putting a target on our heads. Eh. I let you. I was your commanding officer. I could’ve told you no. But who can say no to this face?” Poe said, grabbing Finn’s chin and shaking it back and forth.

“But that wasn’t flirting?” Finn said, furrowing his brows at him.

“No. It wasn’t,” Poe admitted. “Like I said. It was subtle in the beginning and I just wanted to be nice to you. And also not die. And then we became really great friends.”

“Right,” Finn said slowly. “But we were never  _ just  _ friends, Poe. Chewie and I are  _ just  _ friends. Rose and I are  _ just  _ friends. Even Rey and I are  _ just  _ friends. They’re all great friends. In fact, I consider them like family to me. But you’re not just a friend to me, Poe.”

“I know,” Poe said. He chuckled and punched Finn on the shoulder. “We’re best friends. The bestest of friends.”

“Well, yeah. I would say that you’re my best friend,” Finn agreed.

“Co-generals,” Poe said, winking at Finn and going to take a sip of his drink again only to find it was already empty.

“When she asked you if I was your lover, you didn’t say no,” Finn said, smiling a little knowingly.

“I didn’t say yes either,” Poe pointed out.

“Right. But we’re getting there,” Finn said. “Aren’t we?”

“Maybe.” Poe glanced between Finn’s eyes and his lips. “I hope so. But if I had said yes it would’ve implied that we already were. If I had said no it might have given you the wrong idea.”

Finn shook his head. “I know what we are, Poe. I might be an idiot and not notice every time that you flirt but I know that we’re going somewhere together. Putting a label on it or not isn’t going to change where we are right now.”

Sometimes Finn could really surprise Poe. By now, Poe should know that Finn was often a lot more privy to things than he let on. It didn’t change the fact that Poe was surprised at how aware Finn was that there was something happening between them. Finn knew.

“Are you just saying that to get me to stop flirting with you?” Poe asked skeptically, yet still playfully.

“Pft. You? Stop flirting?” Finn joked. “Not even a Jedi mind trick could keep you from doing that.”

“In my defense, I don’t always do it on purpose,” Poe said. “It’s just my personality.”

“Yeah. Which is why you do it to everyone. Which is probably why I hardly notice when you do it on purpose,” Finn said.

“Maybe I’m just not straight forward enough,” Poe thought out loud. He crunched on a still-hot, crispy green while he thought again. “Do I need to transition from flirting to propositioning?”

“I don’t even know what that is.”

“That’s ok. I could show you a thing or two,” he said casually. He paused to take another bite of food. “Hey, do you want some flying lessons?”

Finn furrowed his brows at Poe for the sudden change of topic. Or at least he thought it was a change of topic.

“I think you’d be a really great pilot,” Poe said, trying not to hint too heavily towards suggestion. “Ya know, it’s not every day a man gets the chance to fly in  _ my  _ cockpit.”

Finn was thoroughly confused. Poe’s X-Wing was currently in the hangar back on the farm, completely taken apart because of Poe's midlife crisis. “Um… you’re X-Wing isn’t really in any condition to fly right now-”

“Oh. I’m not talking about my X-Wing,” Poe said.

“Then… what-”

Poe leaned in closer to Finn and said in a low, sultry voice, “Meet me in the fresher and I’ll show you what I mean.” Poe couldn’t keep a straight face as Finn’s face contorted into one of pure confusion.

Poe chuckled as the realization dawned on Finn. “Poe,” he chided him. “I think you’ve had too much to drink,” he said, scooting his ale away from Poe with a warning look on his face.

Poe sputtered. “What? I only had one! And I’m not that old! I can still perform adequately when under the influence,” he said defensively.

  
Finn raised his eyebrows. “Oh really? You sure about that?”

Poe deadpanned. “Come on, Finn.”

“I looked at the side effect of your medication,” Finn said. He tapped his temple a few times. “I know stuff.”

Poe shook his head and pursed his lips as Finn took a big long sip of his ale. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“Suuuuure,” Finn said. He wiped at his face with his arm and set down his glass.

“Oh! So that’s why you had to convince me to stop taking it!” Poe said, loudly, as if it were an epiphany. He was clearly being facetious. “You want to get into my pants! It all makes sense now. Here I thought that you were actually concerned-”

“Uh-huh,” Finn said, going along with it. He nodded and shrugged. “That’s exactly why.” Sometimes when Poe got petty, the best thing to do was just go along with it and be petty right back. If Poe was going to be flippant, so was he because when he did, Poe shut up. He downed the rest of his ale and set the glass on the counter, grabbing the last fried green and eating it. “Think your dad is done yet?”

Poe insisted they had to give Ursa their thanks and promise they’d be back sooner rather than later. But they did leave and both of them were glad they were able to loosen up and talk about their relationship more openly. It reassured the both of them that there was really something there.

  
  


* * *

Poe, Finn, and Kes all returned to the ranch by the early afternoon. Poe went straight to the hangar to work on his ship but Finn helped Kes unload everything into the house and fill up the conservator.

“Hey, Finn. I wanted to apologize for yesterday,” Kes said abruptly as Finn handed him something from the sack of produce he’d brought inside. Kes juggled the piece of citrus before he turned away and placed it in the conservator. “I feel bad for making it uncomfortable.”

Finn handed him another bunch of fruit when he turned back around. “I understand,” he said as Kes turned away again to arrange them in the conservator.

Kes faced him again and held out a hand for more. “But it’s not something you should have had to see or have to deal with.”

When Kes reached for the carton of liquid he’d been about to offer, he pulled it back, determined to make a point to the man. “I’m here for Poe. That means dealing with it. I want to deal with it because I care about him. You’re his family and that makes you mine. Which means all of your problems are mine now too.”

Finn could say that with confidence because that’s what happened when he joined the Resistance and he gained close friends and family for the first time. They shared in their lamentations. They helped each other however they could because when one of them wasn’t well, none of them were. It’s how family and community work.

“I’m not going anywhere, Kes,” Finn promised.

Kes was a bit surprised at Finn’s straightforwardness. But it was refreshing. He didn’t say anything since he was still slightly shocked but he did take the carton from Finn when he was finally offered it again, for real this time. He placed it in the conservator and sealed the door, leaning on the appliance and looking at Finn again. He shook his head and chuckled in amusement. “He sure picked a good one this time.”

Finn immediately furrowed his brows. “This time?”

Kes shrugged. “Eh. When he was in his youth, Poe made a lot of poor choices. It’s good to see he’s finally grown up though. People always say they grow up too fast,” Kes tried to explain but he shook his head in disagreement. “Poe was the opposite.”

“Yeah. I guess we’re different in that way. Poe took thirty-five years to become an adult. I was forced to be one my whole life,” Finn said.

“You balance each other out,” Kes said. “It’s good.”

Finn nodded absentmindedly. But his mind was still kind of on what Kes had mentioned earlier: Poe had been with other people before. Finn hadn’t really thought about that before but he wanted to know about it. He wanted to know everything about Poe.

“So does this mean that you two…” Kes gestured vaguely, something Finn had noticed Poe did often too. He’d probably learned it from his father. “Are you two… official? Can I call you ‘boyfriends’? ‘Lovers’? ‘Partners’, perhaps? Or-”

“We’re getting there,” Finn said. “It’s just… hard to remove ourselves from where we were. I think we got comfortable being Co-Generals and best friends and not confronting those other feelings, avoiding them because we were at war. And now…” Finn sighed and rolled his eyes. “He’s literally taken apart his entire ship for the sake of optimizing it but for what? If we’re staying here, his ship doesn’t need to be…” Finn realized he was getting a little bit worked up and took a breath and sighed.

“Shara did the same thing,” Kes said. That caught Finn’s attention. “Shara had obsessed over her A-Wing after we decided to retire. She didn’t just want to tune it up. She wanted to make it the best it had ever been. Only when she was finished did she realize that she’d worked on it for no reason.”

“Did she regret spending so much time on it?” Finn asked. “Should I be stopping him? Or talking to him?”

Kes shook his head, an extremely patient expression on his face. “Just give him time. It’ll help him move on. At least, it did for Shara. Part of him might not be ready to admit he’s done. Maybe fixing that piece of junk will give him peace. Just remember, it’s not the flying death trap that he’s attached to, it’s the experience and the memories that he doesn’t want to let go of. He couldn’t care less about that ship.”

Finn nodded. “You’re right. It’s just hard to watch someone you love hold on to something because they’re afraid of what would happen if they let go.” Finn hadn’t meant to make a connection between his problem with Poe to Poe’s issue with Kes and that house. But it happened regardless. Finn realized it too late. Poe was holding on in the same way that Kes was. Finn had expected the air to become cold like it had the day before when Poe mentioned the other house.

But Kes wasn’t as harsh and rigid as before. Though Finn could still feel the discomfort Kes felt. “It seems we all have things we need to let go of,” Kes simply said. He shifted over to the sink but paused before turning it on. “Letting go is easier when you have something else to grab on to.”

Something else…

Finn felt like maybe he’d been right about Kes. He was holding on because he was afraid Poe would leave again. Perhaps Poe was struggling similarly. Was he holding onto the past because he was uncertain about the future? Did Finn need to help point Poe in the right direction and give him something to look forward to, something firm to hold onto?

“So when is Dinah coming over?” Finn asked.

“They’ll probably be here tomorrow around midday.”

“They?”

“Her daughter and son-in-law and the baby,” Kes said. “Which reminds me, I think Poe left some blankets up top this morning.”

“Oh yeah. He did,” Finn said. “I’ll go get them. Should I wash them too?”

“Yeah. We’ll strip the bed in the morning for them and they can use those blankets. And then you guys can just take what’s on the bed out to the living room,” Kes explained effortlessly.

“Efficient,” Finn said, slightly impressed.

“When I do it, it’s efficient. When Poe does it, it’s lazy,” Kes teased playfully and Finn cracked up laughing as he walked out the door to go fetch the blankets up top. Finn was really getting used to this. It had barely been two days and he was already putting himself in his place.

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	10. Chapter 10

Poe didn’t know how it happened. He’d gone into the hangar with determination. He was going to put it all back together and fix everything he’d planned on fixing but somehow he made it worse.

The nose of his ship was in even more pieces than before. A proton warhead was lying on the ground, leaking something vile. An entire wing was dislodged. Poe couldn’t even remember why he’d needed to remove it in the first place. Something to do with the power couplings maybe?

Poe was halfway inside of the cockpit of his ship, trying to put something back together for once when the wing collapsed entirely and the ship rocked before crashing to the floor. Poe cursed. “Kriffing hell! Dammit!” He stumbled away from his now-reck-of-a-ship and kicked at the nearest object. “Piece of shit!”

BB-8 started beeping and whirling at him frantically as Poe’s anger worked him up. Fiery hot, he’d always had a temper. D-O had been nearby and came to investigate the crash. “Wha-what a mess-ess.”

Poe deadpanned at the little droid. “Oh! Thanks! I hadn’t noticed!” He grabbed the neared tool, a sub-loop spanner, and chucked it violently at the unsuspecting X-Wing, or at least what was left of it. “Damn bantha fodder ass! I kriffing noticed. Thanks!”

D-O rolled backward slightly, looking between BB-8 and Poe before informing Poe, “General Finn-Finn will not be pleased.”

“Argh!” Poe chucked another tool not even bothering to check what tool it was he was throwing. “I know!” Poe hated that. He hated that Finn would be upset to find the hangar even more of a mess than before because Poe wanted nothing more than to make Finn happy. But he couldn’t! “I can’t-” He threw another tool. “Ugh!”

BB-8 whirled again, trying to keep him from throwing more tools and trying to catch them in mid-air to dampen the disaster that was his master. Poe picked up a flame pitcher, reeling his arm back to throw it but before he could ignite the entire hangar up in flames, BB-8 pitched a grappling hook at it and took it away from Poe.

“Oh-oh my,” D-O said, turning around and wheeling away from the scene. “Must find General-al Finn.” He hurried off to go find Finn.

BB-8 stayed and beeped at Poe explicitly before tasing him, sending him to the floor. Right away, BB-8 rolled over and poked at him to make sure he was fine. “You kriffing tazed me, you ball of bolts!” Poe said through grit teeth.

BB-8 beeped back in defense as Poe sat up. BB-8 appeared to be lecturing Poe about how he almost killed himself and blew up the entire hangar because he was letting his temper control him. BB-8 only stopped when he noticed Poe was crying. His tone changed to one of concern.

“I’m sorry, BB-8,” Poe said, shaking his head as tears spilled from his eyes. “I don’t know what’s wrong with me. I’m not like you. I can’t just reprogram myself or replace a chip when something is wrong.”

BB-8 rolled closer and beeped at Poe sympathetically. He even stuck out his little mechanical hand and patted Poe on the thigh. BB-8 had always looked out for him.

Poe tried to smile at BB-8 to show his appreciation but he couldn’t. Behind the droid was his ship, torn to pieces because of himself. “It’s so heavy,” Poe said. The world felt heavy. It could have been the fumes from all the leaks he’d given his ship. It could have been the weight of everything that ship carried with it.

Death. Violence. War.

Poe hated those things. He would be happy to forget those things. But he was afraid of letting go of everything else. The feeling he’d have when he was free falling. The weightlessness of space. The thrilling nature of flying for a cause.

The Resistance.

Poe startled slightly when he was enveloped in a warm, frantic embrace. “Poe,” Finn said. He’d hurried to his side when he’d seen him on the floor. He held Poe’s face in his hands. “Poe, are you ok? Did you get hurt?”

Poe shook his head. No. He didn’t hurt. It was just so… “It’s so heavy,” Poe said, desperation in his voice.

Finn furrowed his brows, double-checking to see that nothing was on top of Poe’s limbs. “What’s heavy?” he asked Poe.

Poe sniffled and wrapped his hand around Finn’s wrist. Why did it feel like he couldn’t breathe? “Everything.” No  _ thing  _ in particular. It was just… everything. Finn pulled Poe into his chest and held him there. “It’s so heavy, Finn. I can’t-” Poe gasped. Was he hyperventilating? “I can’t-”

“Let it go,” Finn whispered against his ear. Poe clung to Finn, shaking his head. “Let go, Poe. If it’s heavy, then stop holding on.”

_ Maybe he needs something else to hold onto. _

“Hold onto me, Poe,” Finn said. “I’m right here. I’m not going anywhere.” BB-8 beeped at Finn informatively and Finn nodded. “Come on, Poe. Let’s go outside and get some fresh air. You spilled a lot of fuel in here. It can’t be good to be breathing all that in.”

Poe nodded. Now that he thought about it, he did feel kind of nauseous. He let Finn help him to his feet and walk him outside. Breathing fresh air made a world of difference. “Wow…” Poe panted, voice high with exhaustion. “So that’s why I felt so heavy.”

Finn grabbed Poe by the face again. His large hands were firmly gentle against the sides of Poe’s cheeks. He looked at him lovingly, full of concern. Finn brushed away the tears on Poe’s cheeks with his thumbs. “Something you want to tell me?” he asked.

Poe rested one hand in the crevasse of Finn’s elbow and the other held onto Finn’s wrist as he looked deeply into Finn’s eyes. They were so dark. So strong. Poe sniffled. “Yeah…” he trailed off. “Our kids will probably have brown eyes.”

Finn closed his eyes and bit his lips, trying to hold back a laugh. “That’s not at all what I thought you were going to say,” Finn admitted. They both laughed silently, their eyes squinting at each other fondly. “You’re not wrong though.”

Poe lowered the hand on Finn’s wrist to Finn’s chest, pushing a little closer. Finn was like a million breathes of fresh air. “I forgot,” Poe said. Finn made him forget all his worries. Finn was like an anchor, like gravity itself. And in his eyes, he saw the stars.

Poe let go.

Whatever he had been holding onto… it was nothing compared to the arms that were holding him. And those stars that he belonged to? They meant nothing anymore. Because when he looked into Finn’s eyes he saw even brighter stars.

“Will you help me clean up my mess?” Poe asked. Finn smiled, breathing a sigh of relief. He nodded. “And help me put my ship back together? I can’t… focus!” Poe said, blurting the last word frustratedly. “I get started on one task and then I notice something else and…” Poe sighed defeated. “I’m just-”

“A mess,” Finn interrupted. “I know. I’ll help.” They heard a familiar beeping sound and found BB-8 rolling out of the hangar and talking to them. Finn smiled at Poe. “So will BB-8.”

“A-and D-O,” said the shy little droid, staying a safe distance away.

Poe noticed how tentative the little droid was being. “D-O, it’s ok. I’m not going to throw any more tools.”

D-O looked between Finn and Poe tentatively. Finn nodded. “I won’t let him throw any more tools.” D-O seemed to take Finn’s word for it much better than Poe’s. As usual. The droid rolled into the hangar and began nosing through everything and cleaning up. Before Poe could express his offense, Finn put a hand at the small of Poe’s back and pushed him gently towards the hangar. “Let’s get to work, shall we?”

* * *

  
  


Poe sat just outside the hangar in a patch of grass where he could see Finn working on his X-Wing inside. He and Finn had been working on actually putting things back together for almost an hour when Poe started getting irritable. Poe almost threw something again but Finn caught his arms and talked him down. He made him take a break.

D-O joined Poe but didn’t get too close. The little droid never seemed to get too close to anyone. “Poe-oe is a mess,” D-O said.

Poe looked at D-O and sighed. “Yeah… I know.” Poe watched as BB-8 helped Finn anchor a subpanel into place while it was bolted in. “I’m a mess,” he agreed. If Poe wasn’t such a mess, Finn and BB-8 wouldn’t be putting back together that ship of his. Poe wonders if he’d ever taken it apart in the first place if he wasn’t such a mess.

“Finn likes Poe’s mess,” D-O said. Poe furrowed his brows at the statement. D-O didn’t know what he was talking about. Though Poe began to understand as he watched Finn clean up his mess. Finn was always there cleaning up after him. No matter how many times Poe just left disaster in his wake, Finn was right there picking up after him.

“You think so?” Poe said rhetorically.

Poe felt better after taking a break. He knew he could probably get up and help Finn but… he was enjoying the view. The pants Finn was wearing looked extra tight around his thighs. Poe really loved those thighs. Poe felt a little aroused just watching Finn. Which wasn’t a bad thing at all. It was just… Poe hadn’t really felt like that in a long time. Apparently, his hormone suppressant suppressed more hormones than he even realized.

Poe didn’t let the feeling get the best of him in that moment though. The afternoon sunlight was shining into the hangar, casting a silhouette of Finn’s shape as he stood under Poe’s ship, his head fully immersed in something he was trying to fix. He held a hand outward and open. “BB-8, can you hand me the-” Finn felt a tool in his hand. He looked down at it. “Oh. Thanks, Beebee,” he said turning his attention back to the ship.

Poe was a little distracted when it happened so it took a moment for it to register. But BB-8 was on the other side of the hangar. Which meant he hadn’t handed the tool to Finn. Which meant… “Oh shit.” Poe jumped to his feet. “Finn!”

Finn startled and hit his head on the opening of the ship as he lowered out of it. “What?” he asked. Poe seemed frantic which elicited concern from him. Poe looked at him deadpan. “What?” he asked again, more urgent.

“You picked up the tool,” Poe said, gesturing to the spanner in Finn’s hand.

“BB-8 gave it to me,” Finn said, not understanding why Poe was so urgent about a damn tool.

“No. BB-8 has been over there for the last few minutes reprogramming the flight computer,” Poe said, gesturing over to BB-8 minding his own business. “You picked it up,” Poe said, making a gesture with both of his hands. “With the force!”

Finn blinked. “No. I didn’t.”

“I kriffing saw it with my own eyes, Finn!” Poe said. “I mean… I wasn’t really looking at  _ that  _ in particular at the moment but I still saw it!” Poe vaguely remembered a floating spanner. He was way more interested in the moment at the sheer size of Finn’s biceps.

Finn looked down at the metal spanner in his hand. “Ah,” he said, dropping it on the floor.

“What? No. Pick that back up!” Poe demanded. He was excited for Finn. 

Finn was never very thrilled about the idea of being able to do what Rey does. But there were certainly some aspects of the force that he enjoyed. Like the connection, he felt to Poe. Finn reached out for the spanner again, surprised when it almost effortlessly lifted off the ground and floated to his hand. He looked at Poe with an amused expression. “Hm.”

Poe beamed at him, patting him on the arm. “That’s cool, buddy,” he said. Poe saw the expression on Finn’s face. He almost looked slightly disappointed. He couldn’t blame Finn. For him, the force was often associated with power, with the Darkside, with war. Poe had been raised differently, having that force sensitive tree and all. “Finn, being force sensitive is a gift. It’s…” Poe got an idea. He took Finn’s hand. “Come on,” he said, dragging him outside the hangar and around the side of the building where that tree was. They stood underneath it, quiet for but a moment. “Do you feel that?”

“Yes,” Finn said without missing a beat. “I’ve felt it since… I don’t know when Poe. But being here, I feel it so strongly. Sometimes it’s the only thing I feel. I don’t know what it means.”

“It’s a manifestation of the force,” Poe explained. “Even I can feel the force when I’m near it and I’m not even force-sensitive.”

“Are you sure about that?” Finn asked, folding their fingers in on each other. “Cause before we came here, it was you that I felt. How do you know that it’s not you that makes me feel that way?”

Poe looked between them, down at their hands. He smiled. They’d been putting off talking about their feelings for two years. And in the last two days, they’ve made leaps and bounds towards something new. It almost felt like they were moving too fast.

Poe was a pilot though. He liked fast. “I don’t know. Maybe it has something to do with the fact that I was practically raised on top of a force manifestation. Maybe you’ve been able to feel that this whole time and that’s what drew you to me, what drew you here.”

Finn didn’t seem very satisfied with that response. He made a face of doubt and shook his head.

“What are you thinking then?” Poe asked, he was still sort of looking down at their hands but glanced up at Finn through his eyelashes.

“I think I just want to feel you. That’s it,” Finn replied. “Now that the war is over, feeling anything else isn’t important to me. Part of me just wants to stop feeling the force altogether so I can just live my life but then… I feel you.” Finn reached his other arm out towards Poe and pulled him closer, so they were chest to chest. “And I don’t want to stop.”

Poe felt a little heavy again but for different reasons than before. Being so close to Finn was making him a little weak in the knees. Especially since it felt like… maybe they were going to… kiss? Finally? Poe cleared his throat. “So you’re saying that you have a connection to me through the force?” Poe asked tentatively.

“I think I am,” Finn replied. He smiled. “Yeah. There’s something there, Poe. Do you feel it?”

Poe bit his lip in anticipation. “I feel something. That’s for sure,” Poe said, surprised at how tense and hesitant he sounded. He was nervous. Poe didn’t really get nervous. He wished he could get angry at Finn for doing this to him but it’s hard to be mad at Finn. He wasn’t sure if he could take any more waiting though. “Can you just kiss me already?” Poe blurted out impatiently.

Finn had wanted to for a while but he always felt like he had to wait for Poe to do it. He’d had that moment on Crait with Rose but it was very one-sided. He still had no idea how to kiss someone. He almost argued with Poe and told him that exact thing but the feeling of Poe’s hand gripping his side and pulling him closer gave him a surge of confidence that told him to go for it. So he did.

Finn surged forward and caught Poe’s lips with his own. As soon as he did it, he almost panicked because he didn’t know what to do next. Thankfully, Poe didn’t leave everything up to him. Poe kissed him back with twice as much passion and clearly way more experience. He knew what he was doing. Finn went along with it best he could until he had to pull away to breathe.

“Wow…” Finn panted.

Poe chuckled at Finn fondly. “You’re a good kisser,” he said.

Finn shook his head. “You think so? Cause I’ve never done that before.”

“Yeah. I can tell,” Poe said. But he was smiling at Finn in complete amusement. “Thanks for giving me your first kiss, Pal.”

“Plenty more firsts where that came from,” Finn mumbled. If his complexion wasn’t so dark, he was sure he’d be visibly blushing. He realized for the first time that Poe had moved his hands up to his face. He held Poe by the waist. “I hope you saved a few first for me.”

Poe smiled. “I can think of a few. Some of them I’ve already shared with you,” he said. “ _ Co-general _ ,” he emphasized with a wink. They both beamed at each other brightly as they swayed in each other’s arms under the tree. Poe tried to think of a few more firsts. “I’ve never been married before,” he said.

Finn raised his eyebrows. He found that a bit of a shock. He’d never thought of Poe as the marriage type. “Married?”

Poe moved on to the next one. “I’ve never had kids before?”

“Oh. You want kids?” Finn exclaimed facetiously. Poe laughed. “I had no idea. It’s not like you haven’t mentioned repeatedly in the last few days.”

Poe sputtered and smacked Finn’s cheek affectionately before pinching it. “Stop,” he demanded halfheartedly.

“I have news for you,  _ Pal _ ,” Finn said, mocking Poe gently. “You’re gonna have to give me those  _ flight lessons _ you talked about earlier before  _ that  _ happens.”

“Good thing you’re a fast learner,” Poe retorted.

“Cause you’re impatient,” Finn said. “I know.”

“I’m too old to be patient anymore,” Poe said poshly. “Which reminds me, I want to kiss you again.” Poe pulled Finn’s lips down to meet his own. He was determined to get Finn good and confident at kissing fast. This time, he shocked Finn by licking into his mouth. Finn made a muffled surprised sound but it didn’t stop Poe from exploring his partner’s mouth.

Poe almost thought he was overstepping but suddenly Finn took control of the kiss. Finn took charge. He  _ dominated  _ Poe. He was a fast learner alright. Poe was infinitely grateful for that. Though Finn pulled back to ask, “Am I doing this right?” Poe shushed him and pulled him back for more. Poe guided Finn’s hands so they were around his waist, holding him up, before he slung his own arms around Finn’s shoulders.

A whistle from over by the house startled them apart. “Show’em who’s boss, Finn.” Poe immediately grumbled in annoyance but Finn laughed, even waving at Kes. Poe grunted and smacked Finn’s elbow, giving him a look. “Thought maybe you’d want something to eat?” Kes called out. “Didn’t mean to interrupt your moment!”

Poe scoffed. “Don’t believe that,” Poe mumbled to Finn. “He did that on purpose.”

Finn just laughed and put an arm around Poe. “We’ll be there,” he promised Kes. He urged Poe to walk towards the house. “Come on. My face isn’t a meal.”

“Pft. Completely debatable,” Poe declared, begrudgingly marching towards the house with him.

“So does this mean I can actually introduce Finn as your ‘boyfriend’?” Kes asked eagerly.

“Aren’t I too old for a boyfriend?” Poe wondered out loud as he and Finn walked up the stairs to the door.

“Your dad has a girlfriend,” Finn pointed out as he opened the door for them. “He’s older than you.”

Poe ducked into the house and nodded. “Ok. I guess I have a boyfriend,” Poe admitted. He looked at Finn. It felt strange putting a label onto what was going between them. Boyfriend didn’t seem to communicate the same feelings he felt. “But only because we have to put a label on it.”

“Well, what would you rather label it?” Kes asked.

Poe tried to speak but he just didn’t know. “He’s my Finn.”

“That’s cute,” Kes said, patting Poe’s cheek and getting his hand shoved away. “He’s your boyfriend. At least, until he’s your husband.”

Poe stood there with his hands on his hips. He didn’t know if he was more annoyed at the word ‘boyfriend’ or the fact that his dad was just throwing around the word ‘husband’ so soon. But when Finn moved to brush past him, saying quietly in his ear, “I like the sound of that,” he couldn’t be irritated for much longer.

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	11. Chapter 11

Over dinner, Kes had told Poe all about Dinah and her family: her daughter was Safiya, her husband was Arlo and their baby boy was named Tobias. Kes seemed pretty excited that she would finally meet his son. Poe was pretty excited to meet her too. He knew at one point in his life, he would’ve been mad at his dad for moving on but he couldn’t bring himself to be anything but happy for his dad anymore.

Apparently, Arlo had not lived long enough on Yavin IV to be familiar with all of its destinations. So they planned to all take a day trip to see the Massassi temples while they were there. Finn was pretty excited about that since Poe had promised to take him.

When they were done eating, Finn noticed Poe had disappeared to their room while he and Kes cleaned up. Finn offered to close up the hangar for the night but Kes said he had to go take care of a few things. Apparently, there were a few ranch hands coming in the morning to prepare for the Koyo harvest.

So Finn retired to their bedroom. When he got in there, Poe practically lunged at him, smashing their faces together. Finn almost thought Poe was attacking him until he realized he was being violently kissed. He pulled back, trying to catch his breath. “Poe,” he said, almost chiding the other man.

“Sorry. I probably should’ve said something,” Poe apologized. But he didn’t really sound that sorry. “I just really want to kiss you again.”

“Which is fine but that was not kissing,” Finn said. “You violently attacked my mouth with your mouth-”

“Aggressive,” Poe corrected. “I would use the word aggressive, not violent.”

“You aggressively attacked my mouth,” Finn argued. Not that Finn was really that upset. Poe was just excited that he could kiss him now. Finn sighed. “You caught me off guard, man.”

Poe smiled sheepishly. When Finn just stared at him deadpan in silence, Poe sighed. “What? You don’t want to kiss me anymore?”

“I said kissing was fine,” Finn said, stepping closer and gripping the front of Poe’s shirt.

“Just fine?” Poe asked, sounding slightly disappointed.

Finn shook his head as he leaned forward and captured Poe’s lips with his. It was much sweeter and gentler than how Poe had tried to kiss him a moment ago. As little experience as Finn had, he was an exceptional kisser.

Finn controlled the pace, keeping Poe patient. It was slow and tender. He didn’t let Poe just dive in with his tongue right away either. He made Poe wait. He prolonged every part of the kiss, savoring every moment and giving Poe no choice but to savor it as well.

Poe tried to speed things up a few times but each time, Finn asserted dominance over the kiss. He was in charge and Poe liked to challenge that. He pushed boundaries. It was nothing new. But Finn was the only one who could tame his spirit. Poe willingly submitted to Finn’s tongue and let him be the lead.

Once Poe gave up all control to Finn, Finn would move things further. He gently urged Poe towards the bed. Poe wasn’t sure how he was supposed to help teach Finn certain things if he was going to be so assertive this whole time. He made a pathetic sound when he accidentally stumbled backward onto the mattress.

Finn climbed onto the mattress and hovered over him, their legs tangled together. He smiled down at Poe lovingly. “Hi,” he said.

Poe felt his heart beating violently in his chest, stuttering when Finn spoke to him so sweetly. “Hi,” he said back.

Finn leaned down and placed a chaste kiss to Poe’s forehead. “How was that?”

Poe let out a hot breath. “Amazing,” he sighed. “You’re incredible.”

Finn smiled. “You said that being a take-charge kind of guy was hot on me,” Finn explained. “So I took charge.”

“Oh, I noticed,” Poe said. Poe’s mind wasn’t the only part of him that noticed either. He felt electricity coursing through his veins. “That was very hot. And, if you didn’t already notice, it turned me on. I’m kind of hoping you don’t just stop there.”

Finn would have chuckled if he were more experienced in this area but he honestly didn’t know what he was supposed to do. Well… he had an idea. But there were some things that he didn’t know about Poe and he felt like they needed to have a conversation about it before they went anywhere in that direction. “I think we should probably talk about a few things before… I don’t know- before we go in that direction,” Finn said hesitantly.

At the same time, they both rested on an elbow and faced each other. As much as Poe would have liked for things to just keep going, he respected that Finn wanted to talk. There were a lot of things he could want to talk about. He knew Finn didn’t have any experience with intimacy. And the fact that Poe was not human and a few things would be different was definitely a conversation they needed to have. “Of course, what do you want to talk about?”

Finn didn’t know where to begin. Does he ask about logistics first? Does he ask about intimacy in general or mention the fact that he’s not even sure he’s orgasmed before? Does he ask about Poe’s previous relationships? “Do you menstruate?” he blurted out.

Poe glitched visibly. “Um…”

Ok. So that definitely wasn’t the first thing he should’ve asked. “I mean-”

“No,” Poe answered. “Sorry. I was not expecting you to ask that. Ever.” Poe shook his head, biting back a smile at the absurdity. “I don’t menstruate. You probably are just wondering about that whole thing in general, huh?” Poe said.

Finn nodded. He cringed feeling really awkward. “Yeah. Sorry. That wasn’t the question I meant to ask. It just kind of popped out. I just… can you just tell me about it cause I want to know.”

“Yeah,” Poe said. “You need to know. It’s a fair question.” Poe mashed his fingers together and pursed his lips thoughtfully. He wasn’t really sure where to start. “Um, well… first off, I never really had a class on it or anything. I kinda just had to figure out my own cycle and then I did do a little research here and there but, to be honest, I probably should’ve done more. I still could…”

Finn was already fascinated. “Tell me what you know.”

Poe opened his mouth to begin explaining but then he sat up and grabbed the datapad. “Ok,” he said, laying down on his stomach, Finn following him. He used his finger to draw a circle on the datapad. “The circle represents one cycle. Within that cycle, there are two stages. Um…” Poe thought for a second. He drew two large circles on opposite ends of the circle. “Prosthus and Estrus. Think of it like pro-wait, you know about like… just normal - er - average human reproduction, right?” Poe asked before he just assumed. He didn’t know what stormtroopers were taught.

“Stormtroopers weren’t  _ that  _ sheltered, Poe,” Finn said.

“Alright so-”

“Prosthus is like prostate and Estrus is like estrogen,” Finn assumed.

“Right,” Poe said. “Ironically, the hormone that makes me fertile during the Estrus stage isn’t even estrogen. My body doesn’t produce that. But it’s the same concept. Prosthus stage has to do with sperm production and all that. Estrus stage has to do with an egg and like… a sack or something. I don’t know. But in both stages, I reach maximum fertility in the middle and then in between, I have transition phases.”

Finn watched enthralled as Poe made a bunch of markings on the circle representing where different phases started and ended. For as little as Poe tried to make it seem like he knew, Poe seemed pretty privy to it all. He sure had it down considering that was one complex cycle. “I feel like you're explaining the orbital cycles of Yavin IV to me all over again,” Finn admitted.

Poe looked at Finn. It took him a second but he laughed. They both did. “Welp, it’s about that complicated,” Poe said, exasperated already. “Are you sure you can handle that?”

Finn chuckled, leaning in and kissing Poe on the cheek. Somehow he found Poe really adorable when he would sit down and explain things to him. “So how long does it last?”

“I have two cycles in a year,” Poe said. “Roughly five months long. And each transition phase is one week long. So considering fete weeks and holidays, just one of the phases lasts about two and a half months.”

“Hm,” Finn hummed. He stared at the little diagram Poe had drawn for him. He studied it. If he was going to be with Poe for the rest of their lives then he needed to be familiar with it, he assumed. Especially, if they wanted to have kids of their own. “Do you know where you’re at now?” Finn asked. He wasn’t sure how much taking hormone suppressant medication would affect his ability to keep track.

“Five weeks into the Estrus phase,” Poe said. “The only reason I even know that is because I have to keep track of transition phases. I wouldn’t take my medication during that time.”

“And how do you know it’s that phase?” Finn asked.

Poe whistled. “Man, you certainly know all the right questions. This is where I pull up anatomically correct diagrams from the holonet and just make you look at them cause… I don’t know what else to say without making it awkward.”

Finn furrowed his brows as Poe started searching things up on the holonet. “It’s not awkward, Poe.”

Poe huffed. “You’re not the one explaining it.”

“Just tell me,” Finn said. Poe shook his head and Finn pleaded. “Please.”

Poe grunted. “How about you share something with me first, huh? I’ll feel a lot better about sharing uncomfortable things if I’m not the only one doing it.”

Finn sighed. “I supposed that’s fair,” he said. He grabbed one of the pillows from the head of the bed and hugged it, burying half of his face in it. “Don’t make fun of me.”

Poe couldn’t help but grin but he tried to hold back a big smile. Finn definitely had something to share. “I promise. I won’t make fun of you.”

Finn hesitated and Poe nudged him impatiently. “So… stormtroopers aren’t really supposed to have like…” He gestured between them awkwardly. “Connections. Um… and to counteract the urges and desires we were given inhibitors so that no one was really interested in…” Finn cleared his throat. “... flight lessons.”

Poe closed his eyes, trying not to laugh at Finn’s choice of words. “You’re allowed to say ‘sex’, Finn. You don’t have to call it flight lessons everyti-”

“You promised you wouldn’t make fun of me,” Finn whined.

“I wasn’t making fun of you!” Poe swore but Finn pouted. “So there was no interest in anything whatsoever?”

Finn shook his head. “No. Even after leaving the First Order, it took a while to wear off. But the fact that we were literally always almost dying kind of didn’t leave a lot of opportunity to…” Finn paused and bit his lip. He looked at Poe expectantly.

Poe waited for Finn to finish his sentence but he didn’t. “What?”

Finn sighed. “When we were in the Resistance, how did you get privacy to…” Finn vaguely gestured with his fist and Poe’s eyes went wide.

“Oh! You mean- you never?” Poe stuttered a bit. “Like ever?”

“I don’t think so,” Finn whined.

“Oh. Trust me, Pal. If you had, you’d know,” Poe said. Poe reminded himself not to laugh at Finn. It’s not that it was really that funny. Finn was just… surprisingly inexperienced. “Wow. I mean, I was pretty sure you were a virgin but I hadn’t really realized that you’d never even…” Poe went quiet when Finn buried his face the rest of the way into his pillow. “Hey, buddy. It’s nothing to be ashamed of.”

Poe reached out and brushed his hand over Finn’s hair. A few weeks back, he’d let Poe tie it into braids. They were starting to grow out a bit. Finn sighed heavily into the pillow.

“Finn, can I tell you a secret?” Poe said. His lips twitched when Finn peaked up at him. “I don’t remember the last time I  _ grabbed the joystick _ . I’ve had a really low libido for the past few years courtesy of that medication that we just can’t seem to stop talking about today. Um… and I haven’t been intimate with someone for twelve years. So-”

“Twelve years?” Finn asked, sounding surprised. He’d always thought Poe was the type of guy to get around more. It was hard for him to believe he hadn’t even slept with someone in twelve years.

“Yeah,” Poe said, looking a little solemn. “It wasn’t… good. I mean, the relationship. I think I thought it was but I was young at the time. I didn’t know any better but now when I look back I can see every moment he was manipulating me… grooming me.” Poe shook his head. “It wasn’t easy to get out of either.” Poe sighed. “We’ll probably talk more about my past relationships later. I feel like that’s something I need to prepare for… emotionally.”

“Ok,” Finn agreed. He completely understood. Though, every time he learned something new about Poe’s past, it felt strange, like he was adding a new piece to a complicated puzzle. “I understand, Poe. Teaching me about your anatomy is different than opening up about your past.”

Poe nodded. “There’s a lot you don’t know about me, Finn.”

“I know,” he said. “That’s ok. I know you’ll tell me all about it eventually. We have time.” Poe smiled at Finn appreciatively. “Before we got sidetracked, you were about to explain something to me.”

Poe went from feeling vulnerable to feeling awkward all over again. “Kriff, Finn. Ok,” he said, turning their attention back to the datapad. “I don’t know where to start.”

Finn stared at it for a minute. He seemed entirely unphased. He seemed to make out a few familiar things that he didn’t feel the need to ask Poe about. “What’s that?” he asked, pointing to a spot on the screen.

“A… set of nerve endings I guess,” Poe said, his voice strained. He took a deep breath. “Basically, you stimulate that and it triggers these glands over here into producing a lubricant. And when I’m in the Estrus phase it kind of… swells up and that’s how I know that…” Poe cleared his throat. “With the medication, it wasn’t that noticeable but even just one day of not taking it, it’s significantly more… stimulated.”

“And here,” Finn pointed to another area. “I recognize this. But what is that? And… all that?”

“Alright,” Poe sat up. He just had to get this all done and over with. “I’m going to explain this as if I’m giving you directions to some other planet cause I cannot…” Poe shook his head. He was normally very patient with all of Finn’s questions but he was losing it. “Say there is a wormhole.”

Finn sat up. “A wormhole?”

“Not literally,” Poe assured him. Though he hoped Finn already assumed he was speaking figuratively. “But before you enter the wormhole, remember there is only one wormhole, there is a checkpoint that you have to check in with to prepare the wormhole before you just fly in there cause if you don’t it’s just a disaster.”

Finn pursed his lips, glancing down at the diagram. “So… you’re saying that that little bunch of nerve endings is-”

“Checkpoint. Yeah. You got it, Pal,” Poe said before quickly moving on. “Then, once the checkpoint has cleared you, you can go in. But not too fast. Especially if the vessel that you’re traveling in is big and the wormhole has not had many travelers recently.”

Finn nodded slowly. “Ok.”

“Now, once you enter the wormhole, there are two directions you could go,” Poe said. “You can go just straight into the abyss without any consequence. Boom. Mission complete if all you want is to get in, get off, and get out. However,” Poe said, holding up a finger.

“Hang on,” Finn said. “The abyss is-”   
  


“Don’t interrupt me,” Poe blurted. “However, there is another route which no man has ever traveled in this particular wormhole.”

Finn decided to just rest his chin on his elbow and cover his mouth with his hand while Poe continued on his elaborate analogy.

“If you go slightly up upon entering the wormhole, there is an uncharted territory where there is said to be a vibrant, fertile land where you can choose to plant your seed.” Poe continued without missing a beat even when Finn started laughing. “But, you can’t get into that uncharted territory without first penetrating the atmosphere.”

“What?!”

“It’s a very thick atmosphere and, I’m not gonna lie, it’s probably not going to be pretty but if you want to get to fertile lands, there has to be penetration.”

Finn glanced between Poe and the diagram, a pained expression. “Doesn’t that hurt?”

Poe shrugged, trying to continue to be casual about it. “Whatever it takes to get to the fertile lands,” Poe said, humorously. They both laughed a little bit but Poe’s laughter died and he fiddled with his fingers nervously. “No… uh. Seriously, though. That’s pretty much how everything works if you understood my analogy at all.”

“Believe it or not, I understood all of that,” Finn told Poe. “I think so at least. Well, actually. When you say atmosphere, do you mean-”

“Sack. There’s a sack of fluid just kinda…” Poe made a round motion with his hand. “...protecting the lands from intruders. Ugh. Finn, I don’t know how much more of this I can take.”

“Sorry,” Finn apologized. “You’ve explained a lot to me today.” He reached over to Poe and caressed his arm. “We can talk about something else.”

“Good,” Poe said, letting out a breath of relief.

“So what do you want to talk about?” Finn asked.

Poe looked at him and bit his lip. “You know, we actually don’t have to talk at all.” Poe scooched up to Finn on the bed so they were face to face. “We could make out some more.”

Finn smiled as Poe caressed his face. “Yeah?” Poe nodded and leaned in to kiss him but Finn just wasn’t as into it as before. He couldn’t stop thinking about… “Sorry, my mind is in a whole other region.”

Poe sighed. “What is it?”

Finn could lie and say he was thinking about their future or that something else was worrying him but the truth was… Finn closed his eyes and shook his head. “Penetrating the sack.” Poe groaned and laid face down on the bed. “I’m sorry! I can’t stop thinking about it! I don’t know what’s wrong with me!”

“I hate you,” Poe mumbled into the mattress.

“You don’t mean that,” Finn said, rubbing his back gently. He couldn’t help it though. Poe had given him a lot to think about. Poe seemed to be feeling pretty uncomfortable though. Finn rubbed the base of Poe’s neck reassuringly. “Just to be clear, when I say I can’t stop thinking about it, I don’t mean in a bad way, Poe. I’m not disgusted. I’m… fascinated.” He felt like it was important to make sure Poe understood that. But Poe didn’t make any indication that he heard Finn. Finn rolled his eyes. It would take something a little more direct to get Poe to reply. “Frankly, I can’t wait to explore your wormhole with my big ship.”

Poe let out a grunt, finally something. He turned his head to face Finn. “Even the fertile lands?”

Finn grinned. “Especially the fertile lands,” he said enthusiastically. They both laughed. “You want to take a walk or something before we get ready for bed? We don’t have to talk if you don’t want to.”

Poe sighed and nodded as he sat up. “Yeah. We should probably hit the fresher before bed too. Working out in the hangar is dirty work.”

Finn happily got up from the bed and took Poe’s hand. They left through the bedroom door to the outside. They only talked a little bit and kissed a few times while they watched the sunset. They sat under the glowing force-sensitive tree until it got a little late and they went inside to get cleaned up before bed.

Poe was very ready for bed. A lot had happened that day. There was the whole thing with Finn and the medication and then going into town. And that horrible moment all alone in the hangar. And then that amazing moment with Finn. Sure it was followed by the most awkward conversation Poe had ever had to have in his life but he was with Finn. And if Poe had to have that conversation at all, he was glad it was with Finn.

They were all over the place that day but somehow everything fell into its rightful place.

[Update Schedule](https://sites.google.com/view/r-robinsnest/home)


	12. Chapter 12

Poe was woken up by the sound of Finn walking around the room, tidying things up. He was already dressed. Poe found it hard to believe that yesterday had actually happened. So much happened.

“Well look who decided to wake up,” Finn said fondly. He walked over to the bed and sat on the edge. “Sleep good?”

Poe reached out for Finn’s hands to help him sit up. “Mhm,” he mumbled as Finn pulled him closer. Poe found himself staring at Finn blankly. “Was yesterday real?” he had to ask. Just to be sure.

Finn hesitated to answer. Instead, he leaned in and gave Poe a kiss on the lips. “Does that answer your question?”

Poe couldn’t help but feel more awake now. And happy. Finn made him really happy. He smiled brightly. “I don’t know. I wasn’t paying attention. Can you show me again?”

Finn gave him another kiss but pulled away. “If you get out of bed and get dressed, I’ll give you more.”

Poe sighed. “That’s quite the bargain there, General.” He moved his feet off the bed first as he started to get out of bed. “Have you talked to the Sarge yet?”

“Yep. He said Dinah and the others will get here in an hour or two,” Finn said. “So we need to get the room ready for them.”

Poe noticed for the first time that Finn seemed a little off. He was pacing when he woke up. He was constantly wiping his hands on his pants, a little spacey. Nervous. He seemed really nervous about something.

“You ok, buddy?” Poe asked, grabbing Finn’s wrist carefully. He could feel his pulse racing. “Did something happen?” Poe felt his heart drop when he thought about reasons why he could be so distraught. “Did something happen with my dad?”

“No! No,” Finn said. He took in a deep breath and let it out slowly. “I’m just nervous, ok? Don’t get me wrong. This has all been really nice. You know, not almost dying on a daily basis and not having to constantly worry about everything I care about but I’m just not used to this, Poe.” Poe looked at Finn sympathetically as he pulled him in by the waist. Finn continued. “I guess I’m just realizing that I don’t know how to do this.”

“When you say ‘this’ do you mean-”

“All of it,” Finn said. “Everything from being your ‘boyfriend’ to cleaning a room so that it’s suitable for guests. I just-I’m just-”

“Overthinking?”

“Overthinking, yeah,” Finn said. He rested his forehead against Poe’s and sighed, trying to not be so nervous.

“First of all, don’t worry about the room. You’re the most tidy person I know and even if you did miss something, JayZee and Maury would probably catch it. And even then, they won’t kriffing care, Finn. It’s a house. Not a hotel,” Poe said. He reached a hand up and rested it against the side of Finn’s face. “Second of all, you’re a great boyfriend. At least, I think so. And what anybody else thinks doesn’t matter.”

“How could you say that though? We’ve only been boyfriends since last night,” Finn said.

“We made it official last night,” Poe corrected. “You can’t deny that, unofficially, we’ve been boyfriends just without the kissing and… the awkward conversations.” Poe closed his eyes, remembering that the wormhole analogy did, infact, come from his actual mouth and not a dream. “That really happened too, huh?”

“It did,” Finn said with laughter in his voice. He felt a little lighter after that. Finn placed his hand over Poe’s and wrapped his fingers around it. He turned his head just enough so that he could place a light kiss to Poe’s palm. “You’re a good boyfriend too.” Poe smiled in response. “It just feels like it shouldn’t be this easy.”

“Not everything needs to be so damn difficult, Finn,” Poe offered which sounded strange coming from him considering Poe was often very difficult himself. “I can’t possibly understand what it’s like for you. I’m back at my childhood home. I’ve lived like this before, a long time ago. But you don’t have that to fall back on like I do. It’s all new to you. It’s okay to feel nervous.”

Finn nodded. He appreciated that Poe was acknowledging he couldn’t know how he felt or what it was like to be him. But he felt like Poe still knew better than anyone because Poe knew him. “Thank you.” For being there. For permission to be nervous, to try to be human.

“You have me to fall back on,” Poe promised. “Not that you need it. You’re a really likable person. They’ll like you. Probably more than they like me, to be honest,” Poe teased.

“Even when they find out that I used to be a stormtrooper?” Finn asked doubtfully.

“Is that why you’re so nervous?” Poe asked. Finn sighed again and looked down, not answering Poe. But that was answer enough. “Finn, anyone who chooses not to like you for that reason… they’re missing out on one hell of a guy.  _ General _ .”

“ _ Co-General _ ,” Finn said back. He was starting to feel better just talking to Poe. He was sure Poe holding him was helping with that too. “Thanks for believing in me, Poe,” he said sincerely. “Sometimes I wonder what would have happened to me if it hadn’t been you I saved on the  _ Finalizer _ . I don’t think things would have been the same. You’ve always believed in me. And trusted me.”

Poe smiled at Finn. Their faces were so close the man was practically going cross eyed. “You’re a good man, Finn. I believe in good people.” Poe let the moment drag on. But not for too long. He had to seize the opportunity. “Also, I have a thing for really hot, sweaty stormtroopers.”

Finn smiled and shook his head. Of course, Poe had to go and say something like that. “Really now? You thought I was hot?”

“I wasn’t blind. I know a sexy man when I see one,” Poe sassed. Finn huffed and pushed at Poe slightly. “I’m serious though. You took off that helmet and I…” Poe shook his head. “You were so sweaty.”

“How do you remember that detail?”

“I remember meeting you very clearly,” Poe said. “I think my mind was so traumatized from being tortured by Kylo Ren that it hyperfocused on an ultimately really good situation. So I actually remember you better than the torture session. At least, when I’m awake.”

Even years later, that fateful night between Poe and Ren haunted Poe in his sleep. Finn was actually surprised Poe hadn’t had any nightmares at all recently. He supposed it was a good thing though.

“You feeling better now?” Poe asked Finn.

Finn wondered what he ever did to deserve something as great as Poe. He was still nervous but Poe somehow managed to take away the majority of his anxiety. He nodded. “Yeah,” he replied. He pulled Poe in for a hug, burying his face in the man’s shoulder and breathing in his familiar scent. “Thank you.”

“Thank  _ you _ ,” Poe said back. He held onto Finn, basking in the comfort of his arms. If he wanted to, he could have fallen asleep again just standing there but Finn patted him firmly on the back.

“Get dressed,” he said.

Poe grunted and tightened his grip on Finn to protest. Much to his delight, Finn’s hands slid down to his lower back. For someone who had no experience with intimate relationships, he sure knew how to get Poe to swoon.

Poe let out a low chuckle when one of Finn’s hands slid down to his ass cheek. Finn even gave it an experimental squeeze to see what kind of reaction he could elicit from Poe. Poe’s low chuckle turned into a bit of a moan as the pilot started to nuzzle into his neck sensually.

They were both really into this new side of their relationship. They wanted to explore their own version of intimacy. They wanted to play with each other.

Finn abruptly smacked Poe on the ass hard. “Ow!” Poe said into Finn’s neck as he backed off to chide Finn. It wasn’t that he didn’t like it. Poe appreciated that but Finn didn’t have to do it so damn hard. The man did not know his own strength.

“Get dressed,” Finn repeated himself more firmly. Poe opened his mouth to argue with Finn but Finn held up a finger. “General's orders.” As much as Finn wanted to continue this, they could save play time for later.

Poe furrowed his brows. “Hey, wait,” he demanded. “First off…” Poe bit his lip, looking at Finn in that deep collar shirt that just begged him to kiss up and down that entire chest. “When did you become so damn sexy?”

“Oh. I don’t know. Since you don’t take that medication anymore and you actually have a sex drive,” Finn said because he just had to be a little bit of a smartass.

Poe pursed his lips. “I’m sure that is a factor but second of all, while I really do appreciate the sentiment of the ass slap-”

“So sentimental.”

“-it was just a little bit too hard,” Poe said. He made his point further by rubbing the spot where Finn had smacked his ass and made a face. “What? Are you trying to leave a handprint on it? Mark your territory or something? Cause I’ve got news for you.”

Finn had a slightly sheepish expression on his face. “Sorry. I don’t know what came over me-”

“Hey. If you keep it up, pretty soon I’ll be the one cumming over you,” Poe remarked, making Finn blush. “Or under you,” Poe corrected after hearing that outloud. He shrugged it off. “You get the point: that was hot but also ‘ow’.”

At this point, Finn did not know whether he should be apologizing to Poe for hurting him or reacting to the only thing he could think about now: Poe… underneath him. “Um…” He’d also forgotten that he’d ordered Poe to get dressed.

Poe noticed that Finn was glitching and he pressed on. “Finn, it’s really ok. I’m just playing with you, buddy.”

“Oh, I know,” Finn replied. “That doesn’t change the fact that for the rest of the day I’m going to be thinking about you just… underneath me.” Poe almost felt bad but he mostly felt like he’d accomplished a mission he didn’t know he’d had. He had a hold over Finn, an advantage. He bit back a grin which Finn seemed to notice as he regained control of himself and reasserted his previous request. “Put on some damn clothes.”

Poe didn’t seem at all discouraged by this though. In fact, he seemed excited by it, biting his lip and saying, “Sure thing, General.”

  
  


“You made it just in time for lunch!” Kes greeted his girlfriend and her family as they parked their speeder. Finn and Poe were right behind him, ready to be introduced. Kes helped Dinah out of the speeder, catching her gracefully. He was not shy about touching her either which Poe noticed. It made him wonder how long he’d been seeing her.

After Kes greeted her affectionately, she turned to Poe and Finn. Her skin was about as soft as you would expect of a woman her age, pale and covered in freckles. She had the most vibrant green eyes too. She beamed a smile at them, her teeth surprisingly perfect and white. “You must be Poe! I’ve heard so much about you. Come here!”

She didn’t give Poe much of a choice as she wrapped her thin arms around him. He returned the warm embrace. “I wish I could say the same about you,” Poe said, giving his dad a slightly dirty look.

“Poe, this is Dinah,” Kes said, giving them a proper introduction. “She’s a doctor, mother of two, grandmother of one, and, might I say, a mighty fine lover,” Kes flirted with her and she laughed, smacking him on the shoulder.

Poe rolled his eyes. “Come on, Dad. Did you really have to go there?”

“No. I just wanted to embarrass you,” Kes said cheekily. “Speaking of lovers…” he said, gesturing to Finn who was waiting patiently for the appropriate time to insert himself into the conversation. “This is Poe’s.”

Finn put his hand out to greet her. “The name is Finn.” As Dinah was occupied, Kes greeted the young man and woman stepping out of the speeder.

She grabbed his hand delicately with both of hers and squeezed them. “Oh. It’s good to meet you, Finn. That’s a good name.”

“Of course it is,” Poe said, feeling prideful. “I’m the one who gave it to him.”

“Did you now? I can’t wait to hear that story,” Dinah said. As she said that, Kes brought forward the other two. She placed her hands on the young woman’s arm. “This is my daughter Safiya.” She had pale skin like her mothers but it was much smoother and had less freckles. Her hair was a dark shade of brown and flowed down to her hips. “And her husband, Arlo.” Arlo had pale blue skin and bright red freckles on his cheeks, a Twi’lek.

“Hi. I’m Poe.”

“Finn.”

“Good to meet you.”

They exchanged greetings and shook hands. Except Safiya hugged Poe, surprising him only a little considering what her mother had just done and he was really no stranger to hugging people. She squealed just a little bit. “I’ve always wanted a big brother,” she teased and Poe laughed. She was taller than him.

“Well, I hate to break it to you but I don’t think I’m going to get any taller,” Poe said. He barely let her laugh at his own joke before he interrupted it with, “Someone told me that you have a baby.”

“I do! You want to see him?”

“Yes. Yes. A thousand times. Yes,” Poe said anxiously.

“Ok,” she said, turning to the side and waving the hovering bassinet over to them. “He’s sleeping right now so we have to be careful not to wake him.” She looked at Poe, checking for understanding.

All of a sudden, everyone was hovering over to see the baby and Poe was covering his mouth because he did not trust himself not to make any kind of loud noise upon seeing a baby. Safiya smiled at him and laughed through her nose before she opened the bassinet.

Inside was a perfect little baby boy. He had pale skin like his mother but he was covered in blue freckles the same shade as his father. “His name is Tobias,” Arlo said. “We call him Toby for short.”

Finn watched in amusement as Poe made a series of indiscernible noises before he could even utter the words, “Hi, Toby.” Toby had tiny little fingers and tiny little hands. And his face was all squished up and soft. “Aren’t you a precious little thing? When you wake up Uncle Poe wants to hold you. Oh my stars, Finn. Are you seeing this?”

“Yeah. I am,” Finn said. “We all are actually.” Finn wasn’t really referring to the baby. Yes. The baby was beautiful. But everyone knew what Poe was thinking.

Poe turned around and saw the knowing looks he was getting from Finn and his father and everyone else. He put his hands on his hips and tried to act like they hadn’t seen it. “I’m pretty sure Poe’s ovaries just exploded,” Kes blurted out. They all laughed at Poe’s expense. “Come on. Let’s go have some lunch while it’s fresh.”

Each couple walked with each other towards the house, Finn and Poe behind everyone else by a short distance. Finn slipped his hand into Poe’s. “You want one.”

“No, I don’t,” Poe insisted, not bothering to look Finn in the eyes. Finn squeezed his hand and he fessed up. “I want one so bad. Did you see-”

“I saw, Poe,” Finn said. “Very precious.”

“So…” Poe said expectantly.

“So?”

“When are we gonna get busy, huh?” Poe asked, sounding only a little bit impatient. “I told you the how and where last night. I’m just asking for a vague ‘when’-”

“Let’s focus on lunch for now,” Finn said as they approached the door to the house. He unlinked his hand from Poe’s to put on the small of his back. “We can talk about it tonight.”

Poe did not expect to be talking about it so soon though. Of course, he wanted to bug Finn about it because the sooner the better but he did not think he would take the bait that easily. It made him feel a little bit nervous but it was a good kind of nervous. “Tonight then,” Poe said, walking inside where they sat down at the table.

As soon as everyone started eating, Dinah had to get that story out of Poe. How had he given Finn his name? Poe looked to Finn for permission before he told the story in great detail, not forgetting to mention how sexy and sweaty Finn was when he took the bucket off of his head. He barely finished the story when Toby woke up. No one was surprised when Poe eagerly got up to hold the child for the first time and complained about the Resistance not being a suitable environment for babies.

Finn couldn’t help but wonder what their friends would say if they saw their General in this environment. The last year had been especially hard for Poe, taking a toll on his optimism and his hope. Poe knew he never would have survived if Finn hadn’t stayed. He could’ve gone off to train with Rey but he stayed with Poe.

And that decision brought him all the way to Yavin IV a year later. Poe seemed like himself again. The weight of the galaxy was no longer pulling him down. Finn had only known Poe in the heat of war. That Poe always had bags under his eyes, was always on edge and ready for the next battle. That Poe was determined to live up to those before him, his parents and Leia. He never gave up and that was why they won.

Finn admired that Poe. But this Poe? This Poe’s skin was brighter, his shoulders were more relaxed, and he just seemed so much more… happy. Poe was where he belonged even if he didn’t know it, even if he wasn’t among the stars at the moment. Poe was at home. And, to Finn, Poe was home.

[Update Schedule](https://sites.google.com/view/r-robinsnest/home)


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We're nearing the end of Part 1! I just finished writing part 2 and the update schedule for that one will be much more fast-paced so you won't have to wait so long for updates! I was originally going to have it all be one work but it turned into two so... surprise!

Kes helped his guests get settled into their rooms after lunch. Dinah was staying with him while Safiya and Arlo slept in the other room with the baby. Finn cleaned up after everyone while Poe bottle-fed the baby and bugged Finn relentlessly about how adorable he was. As long as the baby was quiet and cute and happy, Poe was great with him.

But as soon as Toby started crying, Poe panicked and pushed the baby off onto the nearest person which happened to be Finn. Finn didn’t really want to hold the baby because it just didn’t feel right or safe. The baby wasn’t really his and he technically wasn’t family to Safiya and Arlo and the baby was so tiny. How could a human be that tiny? But Finn seemed to have an instinct about it despite his reservations and managed to pacify his cries with a gentle sway and proper burping. He wanted to attribute that skill to his brief time taking care of First Order infants but he remembered that even then it came as an instinct.

Kes stole the baby from Finn and took everyone out to the garden. He just had to show it off to them. His vegetable garden was his pride and joy. After that, they lit a small fire in a pit that was placed between the two houses. There were a few swinging benches around the fire as well as various stumps and logs to sit on. Finn didn’t have to ask that time if they were made of Massassi. He recognized that purplish shade in the wood.

Kes popped out a bottle of wine and poured a few glasses. Finn had another one of those moments where he appreciated the delicious taste of something new. Poe explained that it was juice from the koyos right there on that ranch. Finn could tell as the drink was strongly resemblant of the fruit in flavor but it had a warmer tongue feel and a bit of a bite.

They shared yet another tasty meal before more drinks were passed around and Poe was telling stories again. Of course, he got drunk before everyone else. That’s just how it worked with Poe. It was more entertaining for everyone else that way.

Finn sat with his arm around Poe’s shoulder while the pilot retold a familiar war story. “I thought we were going to die,” Poe said. It wasn’t a Poe Dameron story if that phrase was not present. He looked at Finn. “And I was looking at Finn, ‘Well, don’t you want to tell me something? We’re about to die.’”

Poe looked at Finn who rolled his eyes. “I knew we weren’t going to die.”

“Well, I didn’t! But I was about to kill you myself for keeping secrets,” Poe sassed. He took another sip of his drink. “And then Hux was a spy which I totally knew!”

“No, you didn’t,” Finn said, shaking his head. “He didn’t know Hux was the spy.”

“Oh. And you did?!”

“I had a feeling,” Finn said slyly.

“Ooooh. A feeling,” Poe teased and burped right afterward. He started laughing hysterically. “Wow. I’m pretty drunk.”

“You are pretty drunk,” Finn confirmed.

“Aw,” Poe caressed Finn’s face and wrapped his arms around Finn’s shoulders. “You think I’m pretty? That’s so sweet!” Poe kissed Finn on the lips. “I love you, buddy. You’re so sweet.”

Finn nodded. “Soooo drunk.” As Poe reached for another drink, Finn stopped him. “You have definitely had enough for tonight.”

“I think we all have,” Arlo said, standing up. “I’m going to go join Safiya and the baby. It’s getting late.”

Poe pouted. “Aw.”

“But thank you for the exhilarating stories, Poe,” the Twi’lek said. “I look forward to many more in the future. But I think I am ready to call it a day.”

“Me too,” Dinah said, nudging at Kes. “Long day of traveling. I think I’m ready to get some sleep. You’ll join me?”

“I’ll be there in a minute,” Kes promised her. The space around the fire fell into silence as Arlo walked his mother in law to the house. Kes leaned forward and folded his hands. “Are you guys going to stay out here for much longer?” he asked Finn.

Finn shrugged. “I don’t know,” he said as Poe laid his head on Finn’s shoulder and snuggled up close to him. “I don’t know if I can trust Poe to keep it down and not wake anyone up quite yet.”

Kes nodded. “That’s understandable.”

Poe huffed. “I can be quiet!”

“Shshsh!” they hissed at him.

“I can be quiet,” Poe whispered.

“We’ll probably stay out here for a while. Yeah,” Finn told Kes. Right after he said it, it started to rain very lightly. Finn looked up at the sky. Somehow it seemed to be glowing a light blue color even in the dark of night. It must be a storm of some kind. “Or maybe not?”

Kes sighed and rubbed at his forehead. If Poe were drunk alone and sleeping on the couch, he wouldn’t have an issue but the fact that Finn would be there to stimulate conversation and interaction made Kes doubt that was a good idea. “Look, I’m not sure it’s a good idea to have you guys out in the living room tonight…” Kes sighed heavier this time and forced out the next sentence. “I want you to stay in L’ulo’s house.”

That caught Poe’s attention. He sat up and looked at his dad, wide-eyed. “What?”

“I know you when you’re drunk, Poe,” Kes said, defensively. “You’ll be knocking around the kitchen making a mess and keeping everyone up. And with Finn there, you’ll probably not be able to shut up.” Kes stood up and walked around the fire, picking up a few empty bottles. “Make sure you put out the fire before you go to bed.”

Poe stood up and walked over to his dad, nearly tripping. He hugged his dad affectionately. “Thanks, Dad. I know how much that means to you.” Kes patted Poe on the back as they pulled apart. Poe giggled. “I feel like you just don’t want to walk out of your room and find us naked though.”

“I would rather not do that,” Kes agreed.

“Well, it’ll be good practice,” Poe said, spinning around and plopping down clumsily next to Finn. “For when Finn and I are the ones having babies and you’re the crazy old man who lives across the lawn.” Poe beamed at Finn, his eyes glazed over.

Finn smiled at Poe and laughed. “Is that so, huh?”

Poe nodded and leaned in even closer. “Why do you think I brought you home?”

“You are my home,” Finn said. So maybe he’d had a little bit to drink too and it was catching up to him. But he wasn’t nearly as much of a disaster as Poe, per usual. It was good to know that being drunk did not change that.

“Finn,” Poe cooed.

“That’s my cue to leave,” Kes said. “Goodnight. Don’t have too much fun.”

“Oh no. Let’s have too much fun,” Poe disagreed.

“Goodnight, Mr. Dameron,” Finn called as Kes made his way back to the house. Poe snuggled up in Finn’s arms, trying to nuzzle into his neck for warmth. “I see what you did there, General. You think you’re pretty slick, don’t you?”

“Hm?”

“Dropping hints that you want to live there so your dad will have no choice but to go through all those things with you,” Finn said.

“Well, where else are we gonna live? We can’t stay in that house with my dad forever,” Poe said, pulling his face out of Finn’s chest to look him in the eyes. “Besides, didn’t you tell me that my dad needs to know I’m not leaving this time?”

“I guess I did, huh?” Finn and Poe looked at each other dreamily and dazed from the effects of the alcohol. It amazed Finn how Poe could talk about their future so confidently already. Finn thought it felt right though. Poe was onto something even if he was drunk. “I love you,” Finn said.

Poe grinned at him. “I know.”

Finn glanced down at Poe’s lips, a soft smile on his face. He leaned towards Poe ever so slowly. It was like he wasn’t even trying to. It just happened. First, their foreheads touched, then their noses. And Finn started to angle his face, about to capture Poe’s lips.

“Are we about to make out?” Poe asked.

“Shsh,” Finn hissed gently.

“Make me.”

Finn closed the distance between their lips. He could still taste the fermented Koyo on Poe’s lips. They felt so soft and delicate. Poe instantly melted into Finn, moaning airily. It was just them and the slowly dying fire.

Suddenly, a loud bang startled them and the sky began dumping water on them. The fire was put out in an instant after that. “Cloud burst!” Poe shouted over the loud thunder and rain. Then they were running towards the other house for shelter. By the time they barreled through the outside door to Poe’s uncle’s old room, they were completely drenched.

Poe got in and started shaking his hair out. He let out a whoop sound and laughed. “Wow. That’s one way to sober a guy up,” Poe joked as he kicked off his wet shoes and looked at Finn. No. He was not instantly sober but it brought him out of his daze just a little bit. Poe shivered as he turned on the light switch and made sure the door was sealed. “That was cold. It must have come from the northern hemisphere-” Poe turned around and bumped into Finn.

Finn instantly wrapped his arms around Poe, placing hot kisses to the side of his face and neck. “Let’s get you warmed up then,” he said.

Poe let Finn kiss him sloppily. He was warm and it felt nice. Finn’s kisses finally met Poe’s lips again. There was something hotter about them than usual. Poe could feel the need running in Finn’s blood underneath the skin of his lips. He had a feeling where this might lead. It was a good feeling.

Finn undid the buttons on Poe’s shirt, one at a time. “Whatcha doin’ there, buddy?” Poe asked, voice low and breathy from the kiss. His hands were both at Finn’s waist, tugging at his shirt preemptively.

Finn pushed the top of Poe’s shirt away from his shoulders and placed a kiss there. “I need a pilot,” he told Poe, placing another kiss at the base of the pilot’s neck. He pulled back to look into Poe’s eyes.

Poe felt their hearts beating for a few seconds before he felt a rush of excitement and passion rush over him. “Oh. We’re gonna do this,” Poe said, letting Finn push the sleeves of his shirt the rest of the way off so they could discard it onto the floor. As soon as his arms were free, he latched onto Finn’s lips again, eager to get where they were going.

But Finn slowed him down. Poe was always trying to go so fast, faster than the speed of light. Finn needed him to slow down sometimes. And Poe needed Finn in order to slow down. Finn kept their pace reasonable enough to keep Poe wanting more.

They were going to do this right.

* * *

  
  


Poe woke up slowly, sprawled out on a bed. His head hurt a little bit thanks to the alcohol from the night before. He felt kind of gross and sticky. That triggered his memory of what happened the night before.

Finn got a little bit too eager his first time making love to Poe. They hadn’t exactly done it the wrong way but they certainly didn’t do it the way they were planning to for their first time. Poe started laughing.

“What’s so funny?” Finn asked, squinting at Poe sleepily. He looked a little bit grumpy.

Poe stopped laughing long enough only to utter the words, “Atmospheric penetration,” before he kept laughing. Finn had indeed gone that direction with things. He’d been really feeling himself and lost control. “It’s ok, buddy. You were under the influence.”

“I feel so bad,” Finn said. He looked really guilty and Poe felt bad. He probably overreacted when it happened but, to be fair, he was also under the influence and it was a bit of a surprise. “Does it still hurt?”

Poe rolled and scooted a little closer to Finn to comfort him, wincing. “Just a little bit but it’s ok,” Poe said. He wrapped an arm around Finn and gave him a kiss on the lips. “It’s not bad. And I’m not mad at you at all, Finn.”

“You don’t have to be because I’m mad at myself.”

“Hey, don’t say that. You did everything you were supposed to,” Poe said. “You were careful. And you stayed calm. And you went and got towels.” Poe laughed again, remembering Finn walking in with a large armful of towels. “Way too many towels.”

“I didn’t know how many we needed,” Finn said defensively.

“It was literally the size of my fist. One fist does not hold that much fluid. One or two would have been fine,” Poe said, laughter in his voice.

Finn sighed and sat up. “Here’s the thing, Poe. I was planning on talking to you last night about waiting a little bit to have kids.”

“Well, nice job living up to that, Pal,” Poe teased, sitting up with him, feeling an odd sensation in his lower extremities. Finn really did a number on him. He wasn’t complaining at all though. “Relax. I don’t think it’s going to happen that fast.”

“Really?” Finn asked.

“Yeah. I’m… not really at my peak right now so I think we’re in the clear,” Poe assured Finn. “Although, I’m curious how long you were thinking-”

“Not long,” Finn blurted.

“Good cause-” Poe cringed. “I mean, the older I get the less likely-”

“I know. I just…” Finn sighed and rubbed the back of his neck. He smiled at Poe. “I want a little while with just me and you first.”

Poe felt his heart clench and he smiled back at Finn. “You like me that much?”

“Yeah.” Finn nodded. “I want you all to myself. At least, for a little while. Is that selfish?”

Poe hummed. “Maybe. But I’m all yours regardless.” Poe took a deep breath and let it out slowly. “We should probably get out of bed and get cleaned up.”

Finn nodded and glanced down at their laps. “Um. You want me to go grab our things from your dad’s?”

“Yeah. Bring it right to the fresher. You can join me,” Poe said, moving to the edge of the bed to get up.

Finn stopped him by pulling on his arm. “You need help?”

Poe chuckled. “Finn, stop acting like you paralyzed me from the waist down. I’m fine.” He got up from the bed, wrapping one of the towels around his waist. He leaned forward, kneeling on the bed so he could give Finn a kiss on the lips. “I’m more than fine actually. You have a gift. And I’m not talking about the force. However… take last night and add the force…” Poe gave Finn a look of approval. “Can you do that?”

“I’ve never thought about that,” Finn said. “I don’t-where do you get these ideas, Poe? I don’t think it would be appropriate to use the force to-”

“You’re right. It’s probably against the Jedi Code,” Poe said. He rubbed his chin and hummed in thought. “I should com Rey and ask.”

Finn’s eyes went wide. “Poe. Don’t you dare.”

  
Poe patted Finn on the cheek. “I’ll be in the fresher,” he told him before leaving him alone in the room. Finn sat on the bed for a minute, all alone. He needed a minute. He heard Poe curse and then start talking to someone. For a moment, he thought something was wrong but it was just JayZee. Apparently, she spent a lot of time in that house tidying up. The droid considered L’ulo a friend. It made sense that she spent a lot of time there.

Once Finn heard Poe get into the fresher, he put on a shirt and pants, which were still wet from the night before, and started picking up any bedding or towels that needed washed. He ran into JayZee on the way to the linen room. They had an awkward standoff where Finn asked permission to use the washroom. JayZee wanted to do the washing. He felt in no place to argue with her so he left to go grab his and Poe’s bags from the living room of his dad’s house.

When he passed through the kitchen Kes greeted him. “Hey! I didn’t expect you guys to be up so early. Did you sleep well?” Kes raised his eyebrows and looked at Finn suggestively. “Did you sleep at all?”

Finn pursed his lips. “We slept,” he assured Kes. He had no idea how much Kes was supposed to know about his son’s sex life but he felt very uncomfortable at the thought of it. “I’m just getting our things. The rain soaked our other clothes last night.”

“I got inside just in time to miss the cloud burst,” Kes said. He was preparing a large breakfast, something for everyone. Kes really seemed to like cooking for people. At least, he did it a lot. Finn assumed he liked it. “Is Poe still in bed? Is he paying the price of drinking so much yesterday?”

Finn grabbed both satchels that were sitting up against a wall in the living area of the home. “He’s awake.” He also didn’t know if he was supposed to tell Kes that Poe was using the fresher in the other house. Kes had given them permission to sleep in the bedroom room, not use the entire house as they needed.

“That’s something at least. Just make sure you guys are ready to go in the next hour. We want to leave while it’s still somewhat early,” Kes told Finn. “Also, breakfast will be ready soon. You want it while it’s hot.”

“I’ll make sure Poe is ready soon,” Finn promised as he headed for the door.

“And don’t use this fresher,” Kes called out. “We’ve already got four people fighting over it. I’d rather not add Poe into the equation. JayZee has kept everything maintained so you should be able to use the fresher over there.”

Finn was glad they at least covered that. He gave Kes a thumbs up in understanding before he finally left the house. He needed to make sure Poe wasn’t taking his time. Since being home, he was spending a very long time in the fresher every day using up a lot of water.

[ Update Schedule ](https://sites.google.com/view/r-robinsnest/home)


	14. Chapter 14

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> One more chapter after this one!
> 
> I edited it and updated it cause I noticed a few typos...

Poe offered to fly everyone in the freighter so they could all go together to the Massassi Temples. It wasn’t exactly the nicest way to get from point A to point B. There weren’t a lot of places to sit and it was more designed to carry cargo than people but it was faster than any speeder and it was big enough for all of them. Plus Poe got to fly a little bit. Finn had to remind him to take it easy with other people on board though because Poe would easily get carried away when he was flying.

Poe landed the small freighter just outside of the tourist village where other ships were parked and secured. It had been a while since he’d visited this area of Yavin IV. It didn’t seem too busy. At least, not any busier than it was the last time he’d gone. His dad said that the war had crippled the tourism a lot but people were starting to visit again.

“I want to show Arlo around,” Safiya announced. “Do you think it’s okay if we break off from the group for a little while and we can meet up for lunch?”

“I think that’s a great idea,” Dinah said, looking at Kes and smiling. “Kes and I wanted to spend a little time over in the gardens while it was still earlier in the day. Perhaps we’ll all go our separate ways until lunch?”

She looked at Finn and Poe. Compared to the other couples they looked odd. While Dinah was wrapped in one of Kes’s arms and Safiya and Arlo were comfortably holding hands, Finn and Poe were easily a few feet apart, Poe with his hands on his hips and not seeming to be paying much attention. “Huh?”

“Do you guys want to come with us or be on your own until lunch?” Kes asked.

Poe looked to Finn, squinting as a patch of sunlight was hitting his eyes. “I don’t know. Are you sick of me yet?”

Finn squinted back at him. He huffed and shook his head in annoyance. “Yeah. Uh huh. I’m so sick of you.”

“Welp. There you have it.” Finn nudged Poe’s arm, sending him a sassy expression. Poe grabbed Finn’s wrist and started tugging him in the direction of one of the smaller temples.

“Poe-” Kes called out.

“Yeah. Yeah. Meet up for lunch. Got it. Bye!” Poe said hurriedly before he was tugging Finn away from them obsessively.

“Don’t worry,” Finn called out to Kes as he was being dragged away. “I’ll keep him out of trouble. Poe, what are you doing? Where are we going?”

“Somewhere we can be more alone,” Poe said, pulling him into an opening in the trees that lead to a neat trail. The sun still penetrated through the leaves and reflected off of wet patches on the ground and flora. The path was wide enough for more than two people and it was very level terrain.

“Where does this take us?” Finn asked.

“Nowhere in particular,” Poe said, linking their fingers together as they slowed from a brisk walk to a meandering pace. “It’s a walking path. It goes all the way around the temples. And there are smaller paths that lead to the temples and to the different tourist spots. We can stop and see some if you’re interested,” Poe offered.

Finn shook his head. “Maybe in a little while. I’m okay just walking in the forest with you for a while.”

Poe beamed a warm smile at Finn. “Me too.”

They walked in a comfortable silence for a few minutes before Finn asked, “So how are you feeling? Your stomach, I mean. Do you notice a difference at all?”

Poe looked down at the ground thoughtfully and nodded. “Yeah. I haven’t felt sick since I stopped taking it. And… it might sound crazy but I feel better… overall.”

“Yeah?” Finn said, prying at him for more.

“Yeah. I feel like myself again,” Poe said. “My head is clear. I have more energy. I feel happier.”

Finn smiled. “You sure it’s not just because you’re home?”

Poe looked at Finn with a raised eyebrow and a cheeky grin. “Or because we had sex.” Finn tried not to smile. “Either way. I feel a lot better. It probably has to do with all of it. Even not having to worry about the Resistance so much.”

Finn nodded. “I’m sure that is part of it.”

“What about you?” Poe asked, looking at Finn. “How are you feeling? About being done with the Resistance. About Being here. About us? All of it.”

“I feel better too,” Finn said. “It’s nice not having to worry about rations and missions and negotiations and peace treaties. I thought I would miss the adventure but I think being here and learning how to live is an adventure of its own. And I’m enjoying the peace and quiet more than I thought I would. It’s… really nice here.”

“It is,” Poe agreed. They fell into a comfortable silence for a moment before Poe had to ask, “And how do you feel about things with us?”

Finn sighed. “I gotta be honest, Poe…” He stopped them and they faced each other. Poe had a concerned look on his face and Finn couldn’t help but laugh because Poe was probably thinking he was about to say something bad. “It’s great,” he assured him, taking Poe’s hands in his. “It’s just really weird. I don’t know how we spent so much time together and were so close… Poe, we’ve been so close this whole time. It’s hard for me to remove myself from what we were to this new form of intimacy even though it’s… amazing and feels right.” Finn sighed and winced slightly. “It feels so right that it almost feels wrong. Does that make any sense?”

Poe hadn’t really known where Finn was going with that. It scared him for a moment. He wasn’t sure if he was still scared. “It makes sense, Finn. And you’re right. The relationship we’ve had for the last two years has been absolutely incredible. I don’t want to let go of that either. I don’t think that we have to or even that we should. We’re kind of just… adding more to it. We started here,” Poe said holding a hand out. “We became friends. Best friends. Even better friends.” He brought his hand up higher slowly. “We got a little flirty, a little jealous, and then became co-generals,” Poe said, inflicting flirtation into his tone as he waggled his eyebrows at Finn. He brought his hand up higher. “And then it just kept getting higher as we got closer over this last year. A lot of sleepless nights and taking care of each other. So naturally, it’s safe to assume that the bar is just going to keep getting higher.”

“Take us to the stars,” Finn teased.

Poe seemed to like that expression. “Oh, buddy. You took me to the stars and back last night,” Poe said proudly. They both laughed as Poe finally lowered his hand back down. “I’m still your best friend, Finn,” Poe assured him. “I’m still your co-general even if there’s no Resistance anymore.”

Finn kept hold of Poe’s other hand as he started to walk forward again. “I feel like I’m dreaming right now,” he said. He glanced over at Poe. “If this is a dream, please tell me,” Finn said looking at Poe pleadingly.

“If it’s a dream would you really want to wake up?” Poe asked.

Finn knew the answer to that. He knew this was exactly what he wanted. But he didn’t reply in time. Poe pinched his arm hard. “Ow! What was that for?” Finn glared.

“Proving to you that this isn’t a dream,” Poe said. Finn sighed, not seeming to be very calmed by that. It worried Poe to the point where he was feeling nervous. Maybe he’d been too pushy and they were going too fast for Finn. “Finn, what is it that’s bothering you?”

Finn stopped them in their tracks again and grabbed Poe by the face. “Poe Dameron, you are the single most greatest thing that has ever happened to me. And getting to have this with you is also the most terrifying thing that could happen to me because I could lose you.” Finn subconsciously ran his fingers through the sides of Poe’s hair, fiddling with those curls that were so much more pronounced on Yavin IV than anywhere else. “I’ve never felt this way for anyone before, Poe, and it terrifies me because I never want to watch you go.”

Poe looked into Finn’s glossy eyes. The sincerity of raw emotion hit heavy. Finn didn’t always get emotional like that but when he did it was because he was feeling something very strongly. He could tell Finn was scared. Poe was usually the one who got scared and he had to rely on Finn as his rock. So Finn being scared terrified Poe.

Finn bit his cheek and looked up, blinking away some tears. “I just want to do everything right, Poe. I don’t want to mess anything up.”

“I don’t want to mess anything up either,” Poe said. His voice was softer than normal. “But it’s going to happen. We’re both going to make mistakes. We need to be okay with that. We can’t be afraid of messing up. At least, not too much. It’s one thing to be afraid of messing up. It’s another to be so afraid to mess up that you hold back.”

“See that’s the other scary thing, Poe. I don’t think I can hold back.” Finn winced slightly. “If last night taught us anything, it’s that when it comes to you I can’t hold back.”

“Well neither can I,” Poe said.

“Isn’t that dangerous or something? To just run into something that matters so much to both of us without holding back?”

“Probably,” Poe said. “But is it as dangerous as escaping the First Order with a mangy Resistance pilot?”

“You were never mangy.”

“Is it as dangerous as standing up against Kylo Ren with a nothing but a lightsaber while a killer planet is imploding?”

“Poe.”

“Or getting on a ship with me multiple times knowing I was about to pull a crazy stunt that should’ve killed us?”

“Now that one is pretty dangerous.”

“Or not getting on that transport with Rose and staying on that damn Star Destroyer?” Poe frowned and punched Finn on the shoulder. “I’m still pissed about that one by the way.”

Finn smiled, catching Poe’s hand so he could hold it. “I feel like you’re targeting me here.”

“Cause I am,” Poe said, startling slightly when he heard a rustling sound in the bushes behind him. “I-” He did a double-take before he realized what it was. “Ah!” He quickly hid behind Finn.

“Poe, it’s just a monkey,” Finn said. Finn looked at it. It was very colorful with fanned out red, yellow, green, and blue hairs on its tail.

“No!” Poe said. “It’s a woolamander!” The creature moved along the branch it was hanging from and Poe startled again. “Ah! Blast it, dammit!” he demanded, throwing an arm around Finn from behind, clinging to him for dear life. “Kill it!”

“Poe, I’m not gonna-”

“They have it out for me. I swear,” Poe said through grit teeth. As if on cue, the creature started towards them in a defensive stature. They both backed away but Poe started to make a pathetic whimpering noise. “Finn, kriffing blast it!”

“I didn’t bring my blaster!” Finn said.

“Well neither did I!” Poe cried. Suddenly, a small herd of whoolamanders rushed from the flora around them and Poe quite literally climbed onto Finn’s back and started to sob. “Finn, I’m scared.”

Finn blinked, confused how they went from having a nice conversation to Poe having a full-fledged panic attack over some damn monkeys. Finn looked over his shoulder at Poe to see a few tears. Finn looked down at the whoolamanders. They seemed harmless, just staring up at them innocently. “Are you crying right now?”

“Yeeeees!” His cry was muffled in the fabric of Finn’s shirt. Finn moved slightly, trying to adjust them so Poe wasn’t making him so uncomfortable and Poe blurted desperately, “Don’t put me down! Don’t put me down.”

“Let me have my arms!” It took Poe a second to allow Finn to have his arms back. He unwrapped his legs from Finn very momentarily before he whimpered again when one of the woolamanaders moved. “Thank you,” Finn said through grit teeth as Poe wrapped his legs around Finn’s waist tightly. He sighed and looked at Poe again. “Are you being for real right now?”

Poe only let out a shaky sigh. That answered Finn’s question. “I hate monkeys,” Poe said before burying his entire face in the back of Finn’s neck. “Take me away,” he muttered.

Finn sighed before he started marching along the trail. “Sometimes, I find it really hard to believe that you’re the one who is nearly a decade older.” Poe didn’t respond. He just kept hiding in Finn’s neck, not wanting to see the woolamanders that followed them.

* * *

  
  


Finn crunched down on the crispy, fried dessert that Poe had insisted he have while they were there. It was still hot, almost too much so. There were little sprinkles of sugar and species that coated the outside of the treat. The inside was gooey and soft and had an orange fruit filling.

“Incredible,” Finn said as he liked some sugar off of his fingers. He noticed Poe watching him fondly, licking his own lips. Finn stopped. “Why do you enjoy that so much?”

Poe hardly noticed the question. He was hyperfocused on Finn’s mouth. “Hm?”

“Whenever I eat you look at me like that?” Finn said. “Why?”

Poe shrugged and shook his head. “I don’t know. Maybe it’s because food makes you really happy and I like seeing you happy… and hearing you moan in pleasure and… lick things,” Poe said, still a bit dazed but raising his eyebrows at the end suggestively.

Finn furrowed his brows, looking at Poe so intensely he almost seemed offended. “Is that why you keep feeding me such amazing food? Cause it makes you horny?”

“No,” Poe said firmly, hiding his offense that Finn would deduce such a wild claim. “I know that the way to your heart is through your stomach. That’s why I feed you.”

Finn sighed, reaching up to brush back one of Poe’s curls. “You already have my heart.” He leaned in and kissed Poe on the mouth, their first kiss in public. Finn still had sugar on his lips, transferring it onto Poe’s. The kiss was sweet, quite literally.

Poe beamed at Finn up close. “Well, since I already have it, then yes. I feed you good food cause it’s hot on you.” Finn laughed jovially as he pulled Poe into a hug, forgetting about the dessert for only a moment before he started eating it again.

Meanwhile, Kes stood with Dinah at the corner of the small shop Poe had convinced everyone to go to for dessert. He saw Finn and Poe just around the corner, closer than necessary and kissing and holding hands. “And you were afraid he’d never find anyone,” Dinah said, noticing where Kes’s gaze had landed.

Kes sighed. “I think I was more afraid he’d never come home again…” he admitted.

“Well, he came home and he brought someone with him,” Dinah said, placing a hand on his arm to bring his gaze towards her. “Are you fears put to rest now?”

Kes squinted at her in the sunlight. He bit his cheek while he thought, looking back at his son and his lover again as they started waking away. “No. Because he’s come home before and he left then.” He looked down and shrugged. “I understand why he had to.” Kes knew Poe had a calling. He hadn’t known just how big that calling was, to work so closely with Leia Organa, to lead the Resistance in the battle that would save the galaxy. “And if he had to leave again, I would understand then too.”

“But you want him to stay,” Dinah concluded.

“Of course, I want him to stay,” Kes said, looking at her with a sad kind of confidence in his eyes. “I want both of them to stay. I want to be a part of their lives. And Poe wants to have kids. It would kill me if they left for any other reason than to save a life.”

“Hm,” Dinah hummed. She nonchalantly acted as if there wasn’t really much of a thing to do about it. “Too bad you don’t have an extra house sitting around for them to raise your grandchildren in.” She held back a grin at the unimpressed frown Kes was sending her way. “I think you know what you need to do, Kes Dameron.”

“What if that’s not what he wants?”

“What if it’s exactly what he wants?” Dinah retorted. “If he doesn’t want that, the worst that will happen is he says no but he knows he has the option for later, a reason to come back. If he does want that and you never offer that to him, never give him your blessing, he’ll have a reason not to come home. Which do you think is worse?”

Kes closed his eyes and sighed. “Yeah. I think you’re right.” He nodded, still looking off in the distance at his son walking with his lover, getting less visible as tourists and foliage got in the way. “I know what I have to do.”

[ Update Schedule ](https://sites.google.com/view/r-robinsnest/home)


	15. Chapter 15

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The chapter you've all been waiting for!

Poe didn’t think it was possible to be this happy. He spent the entire afternoon with Finn by his side. He showed him every corner of each temple. He retold at least a dozen rebel war stories he’d grown up hearing, most of which involved his mother. Finn found himself wishing he could have known her.

Poe brought him to the tallest of the temples last and they reached the final tier just in time to watch the sunset. Finn was watching it, taking in every detail. The position of Yavin in the sky and the way the clouds were glowing a deep red. In the distance, there were dark specks moving towards the setting sun, a flock of birds.

As the bright light of the sun began to dim, the dim glow of night was coming to life in the jungle that surrounded them. Fluorescent blues and greens were already visible in the darker parts of the forest that were no longer touched by sunlight. And the shimer of the iridescent Massassi bark all around them was at its peak visibleness during sunset when the sun was at an angle. Soon the shimer would be dimmer and more blueish.

A flash of green flicked along the horizon as the sun said its final goodbye. Only then did Finn peel his eyes away from the view to find Poe watching him in the same way he’d been watching the sunset. He smiled softly. “Enjoying the view?”

Poe seemed to become slightly more alert, reaching to link their hands together and pull Finn flat against his chest. He looked him in the eyes deeply, searching for something halfheartedly dazed. “Are you?”

Finn pulled Poe forward by the back of his head, placing a kiss on his forehead. “Thank you for taking me here,” he said softly to Poe. Finn’s fingers fiddled with Poe’s curls, running his fingers through them gently the way he knew Poe liked so much. Poe sighed softly at Finn’s touch. He left his forehead fall against the side of Finn’s face as he soaked up the feeling that ran up and down his spine with each touch. Finn kissed his temple before clarifying, “To Yavin, I mean.”

“Thank you for coming home with me,” Poe said. He pulled back to look at Finn softly. “It feels more like home with you here than it ever has.”

“I guess I’ll have to stay then,” Finn said playfully.

“Hm. You better,” Poe said fondly. “I’m looking forward to many more sleepovers watching the stars with you.”

“Is that what the future holds for us then?” Finn asked. “Cause if it rains the way it did last night very often…” Poe started laughing and Finn was pleased at the sound. “Hey. I’ve been wondering…”

“And what’s that?” Poe asked curiously.

“You were going to tell me about how that was a Dameron family tradition but you never did,” Finn said. “I think you owe me a bit of an explanation. Or is it as complicated as the many other things you’ve had to explain to me the last few days? Do you need a break from explaining?”

“No. No. It’s fine,” Poe assured him. “Not complicated at all. Um…” He reached into the neck of his shirt and pulled the necklace out to where it was visible. “The first night my parents stayed on the farm, they slept out under the stars where we did. My dad gave this to my mom and asked her to marry him. Not sure which happened first but they did get married and they also got pregnant with me.”

Finn had heard about Poe’s necklace. At least, he knew it was his mom’s and what it was for. He’d asked Poe about it long ago and he never forgot what it was. But he’d never heard about his parents getting married or even much about Poe coming into their lives. “On purpose?”

“My dad won’t admit it was an accident but I have intel from an inside source: my grandfather,” Poe said. “He took care of me while they were at war for a few years and when they came back they were strangers to me. But they won me over with sleepovers under the stars and stories of adventure.”

Finn chuckled. “You’ve always been pretty friendly with strangers then, huh? Here I thought I was the exception,” Finn said jokingly. He couldn’t help but think about Poe’s parents though. “It must have been hard to leave you behind.”

“Yeah. I’m sure there was a time when I would have done the same,” Poe said, looking down at Finn’s neck absentmindedly. “I didn’t fully understand that until now. But I always felt like I had a purpose and something was calling me to the stars. I thought that fighting for the greater good was my ultimate destiny.” Poe looked up just enough to meet Finn’s eyes. “That feeling is gone now. It feels like I did what I was supposed to do and now I can just live. And my dad has been trying to explain that feeling to me my whole life but I didn’t understand it until now.”

“Cause you’re finished,” Finn said. He ran his hand over Poe’s hair again, feeling a warm feeling in his chest as he teared up a little. He knew exactly what Poe was talking about. He knew that feeling. He felt it. Finn nodded not able to hide that emotion from Poe. “I think we both are.”

Poe’s heart clenched at the sight of Finn getting emotional. “You know what I’m talking about?”

Finn nodded, sniffling. “Everything happens for a reason. I think the Force had a purpose for us and we fulfilled that purpose just like your parents did. And now that purpose has been replaced with freedom. And peace.”

Poe let out a breath he hadn’t realized he’d been holding. He looked at Finn with raw appreciation and fondness and somehow still disbelief. He felt like Finn was so much smarter than him sometimes. “I wish I would have realized that sooner because here I was feeling lost without a purpose. But I couldn’t see it that way until you said it.”

Finn smiled and pulled Poe a little tighter to him, pressing a kiss to his temple. “Everything happens for a reason. That includes you and me.”

Poe wrapped Finn up in one of those hugs. It was open and warm and so genuine. No one was better at those kind of hugs than Poe. “I love you,” Poe said.

“I know.” Finn held onto Poe just as tightly, soaking up as much of that warmth as he could. Poe just radiated a type of warmth that he craved when they hugged.

When they finally pulled apart, they were smiling and both of them were happier than they ever had been. Neither of them knew what the future held for them but they knew they would face it together. And they were looking forward to it.

When they looked outward, the sky was dimming enough that the stars were visible. “So are you used to seeing the stars from down here yet?” Finn asked.

“No,” Poe said, squinting up at the stars. “But that’s ok. I don’t need to. I’ve got the brightest star right next to me all the time.” He looked at Finn, a bright, slightly playful grin on his face.

Finn could only laugh and wrap Poe up in his arms as they turned around and started towards the stairs. “I think it’s time to get this pilot home.”

* * *

  
  


Poe took a step back to watch as Finn completed the final detail of repairing his X-Wing, polishing the canopy. He swore it had never been so shiny and spotless. And overall, his entire X-Wing was more perfect than it was ever meant to be. Finn had almost everything to do with that seeing as Poe could not maintain enough focus to complete one task at a time.

Finn jumped down from the nose and threw the rag over his shoulder. “There,” he said, looking over the ship one last time. He let out a breath of relief. “It’s done.”

Poe was so happy that all he could do was laugh. BB-8 chirped appreciatively. “I know, Pal. That’s exactly what I was thinking.” When he heard a whistle from behind him, he spun around. It was Kes.

“Wow. It’s looking good, Generals,” Kes said sounding impressed. He put a hand on his son’s shoulder. “I’m surprised you managed to get it cleaned up so fast.”

“Well, I didn’t,” Poe said. He gestured to Finn before walking up to him and hugging him warmly. “Buddy, you didn’t have to go through all of this for me.”

Finn raised an eyebrow. “You asked me to help you.”

“I did,” Poe said, remembering the day he’d completely fallen apart on Finn. “But you didn’t have to say yes.”

“Oh but if I didn’t you would be even more of a mess than you were when you asked me,” Finn said, a bit of a forced smile onto his face before it turned more genuine and he hugged Poe back. “I’m glad I could help.”

Poe knew his father was watching and probably waiting to tell them something so he forced himself to pull away. He faced his father catching the less than happy look on his face. His own smile fell. “What’s up, Pop?”

Kes’s eyes met Poe’s. “So does this mean you’re leaving?”

Poe furrowed his brows. “What gives you that idea?”

Kes gestured to Poe’s ship. “It’s fixed. Why else would you fix it unless you needed to fly it somewhere?” He knew the real reason Poe was fixing his ship. He’d seen Shara do the same thing after all. He just wanted to know that Poe knew.

Poe almost felt offended, placing his hands on his hips, ready to say something cheeky but nothing came. He had no excuse. He didn’t know why. He looked at Finn hoping he’d have an excuse for him but all Poe got from him was a look that told him his dad had a point. Poe looked back at his ship. Why had he gone through all the trouble of fixing it? Or… messing it up at least. He looked back at his dad and made a weird sucking sound with his mouth. “That’s a good question,” Poe said. He looked at Finn unimpressed that Finn seemed to be privy to this logic and didn’t feel the need to bring it up to Poe.

Kes chuckled. “Eh. Your mother did the same thing. You were much worse though. Much worse,” Kes emphasized. “You mother actually managed to put it all together by herself without making a huge-”

“Ok!” Poe said putting his hand up to stop Kes. “We get it. I’m a mess.” Poe sighed and looked at Finn. “I hope you know I’m a mess.” Finn didn’t even have to say anything. A single quirked eyebrow did the trick. Poe looked back at his dad. “He knows what he’s getting into.”

“Good,” Kes said a smile on his face. He reached up and scrubbed at the scruff on his face. “Hey, I wanted to talk to you about something.” He waited until he had Poe’s full attention. He wasn’t sure what he should say but he reminded himself he was working with Poe. And Poe would appreciate it if he just got on with it. “I want you to move into the other house, Poe.”

Poe glitched for a moment. He was processing what his dad was trying to tell him. Of course, that was what he wanted but he didn’t think his dad would ever come to that decision on his own. “What?” he asked in disbelief.

“It’s yours,” Kes said. Then he pointed between Finn and Poe. “Both of yours.”

Poe blinked. “...the house?”

“Is that what you want?” Kes asked.

Poe sputtered. “Yes!” Leaped forward to hug his father. “Dad, are you serious?”

“I dream of being the crazy old man who lives across the way,” Kes said, recalling what Poe had said when he was drunk.

Poe pulled back, still in disbelief. “Even if it means going through all that stuff.”

“Well, my grandkids are going to need a bedroom, aren’t they?” Kes teased. Poe hugged him again. Kes hugged him back. “I like having you home, son.”

Poe squeezed Kes extra tight and when he finally pulled away, his smile reached his eyes. “Thank you.”

“Thank you for coming home,” Kes said. It felt right to finally have his son home. And it felt good knowing he’d have his son home for at least the foreseeable future if not for good. “I hope you stay for good this time.”

“I hope so too,” Poe said, pulling back and looking at Finn. He held his hand out for Finn to take. “What do you say? Settle down on this moon with me?”

Finn looked down at Poe’s and for a second before he took it and smiled at him. Before Finn could find anything to say to Kes other than a simple ‘thank you’, Poe was dragging him off to their house.  _ Their  _ house. They had their own house.

Kes watched them. He’d done the right thing. He could feel it. Shara would be happy with this.

* * *

  
  


Finn and Poe stood inside the living room of the house. JayZee has kept it pretty neat and clean but it definitely needed some love and attention before it truly felt like theirs. Regardless, they had a house all to themselves, an actual physical place to call their home.

“We have a house,” Poe said to Finn, unable to wipe the huge grin off of his lips.

  
“Uh huh.” Finn nodded. “We have a house…” Finn furrowed his brows at Poe, still processing the information. “What?” he questioned out loud. At the same time they both just laughed.

Poe pulled Finn close to him by the hip and looked at him happily. “How did we even get here?”

“I have no idea. We were barely arriving here just a week ago,” Finn said. “But it feels just about right with us. Don’t you think?”

Poe bobbed his head in consideration. They were no strangers to huge life changes in a matter of days. All the times the Resistance suffered huge losses made them resilient to those changes. “I guess it does. Next thing you know, we’re gonna be married or something,” Poe joked and laughed. His laughter trailed off at the look on Finn’s face though. He cleared his throat. “What?”

Finn sighed, hesitating before asking. “What does that mean? To be married I mean. How is it any different than just… being with someone?” Marriage didn’t typically happen in the First Order. In fact, he could not think of a time when he’d ever met someone who had been married.

“Well, it’s different with different cultures,” Poe started with. “Most commonly, it’s a promise or a commitment between two people. It’s different for everybody. Usually, there is a ceremony which is also different for everybody. Sometimes they’re a huge deal and people come from all over the galaxy but sometimes it's spur of the moment and whoever is there ends up a part of it.” Poe smiled sadly. “That’s how Snap and Kare’s wedding was. It was just their friends within the Resistance and Leia held the ceremony. Wedge and Nora were pretty upset that they didn’t get the chance to be there.”

Finn smiled fondly as Poe reminisced in those memories of his friends. “What about your parents?” Finn asked. “What was their wedding like?”

“They actually didn’t have a ceremony until after they returned home and I was three,” Poe said. “They were already married but they just hadn’t had a ceremony. So I was there. I just don’t remember much. They had friends from the rebellion there though. It was a pretty small wedding. You should ask my dad about it if you really want more details.”

Finn filed that away for later. He was curious about Kes and Shara’s wedding. But also, three-year-old Poe. He was having a hard time picturing Poe as a child. For now, he had another question for Poe. “Do you want to get married?”

Poe froze much like he had when Kes had told him about the house. “What?”

“Is there a reason we shouldn’t?”

“Is that why you were asking about it?” Poe asked, suddenly looking panicked and horrified.

Finn couldn’t help but laugh at the look on Poe’s face. “Well, yeah. I remember you saying you felt too old for a boyfriend so…”

Poe’s mouth was hanging open as he stared at Finn until Finn pushed Poe’s chin up with his finger. “I’m sorry. Just to be clear, are you asking me if I want to get married just… someday or are you actually asking me to marry you?”

“I’m asking you if you want to marry me. I don’t know why you’re so shocked right now,” Finn said, sounding just as confused as he looked. “We’ve literally already talked about having kids. Why would we talk about having kids together if marriage is out of the question?”

“It’s not out of the question, Finn,” Poe said. “In fact, it’s expected.”

“Then why are you being so weird about it?”

“Usually, when people ask someone to marry them it’s a little more romantic.”

Finn looked at Poe very unimpressed. He rolled his eyes and asked, “Are we getting married or not, Poe?”

“Well, yeah! I was supposed to be the one to ask you though.” He reached into his shirt and held up his mother's ring. “With this!”

“That’s your mom’s, Poe.”

“This is why she gave it to me,” Poe said, looking down at it clearly upset.

Finn put both of his hands around the hand Poe was clutching his necklace with. He pressed his lips against Poe’s knuckles and looked at him softly. “Keep her with you, Poe.” Poe looked up at Finn with tears in his eyes. He always knew the necklace was never really his. It belonged to his partner, to Finn. But it was all he had left of his mother. Finn pressed Poe’s palm back against his chest, laying the necklace back where it belonged. “Keep it for me.”

Poe blinked a tear away and nodded. He looked down at where Finn’s hand was, pressing the ring to his heart. What once reminded him of his mother was for Finn now too. For both of them. Poe actually let out a sob and looked up at Finn. “Wow…” He sniffled.

“That romantic enough for you?” Finn asked.

“Mhm,” Poe said. He let Finn pull him into a hug where he rested his head on Finn’s shoulder. “Let’s get married.” Finn ran his hand up and down Poe’s back and kissed Poe on the forehead. “Start a family.” Poe sighed. “And grow old together.”

Finn’s hand was in Poe’s hair, running through those perfect curls. “I love you.”

“I know.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Welp! There is part one! Hope you enjoyed it and are looking forward to part II. I will start posting part II on November 2nd and then every other day from there. So there will be about two weeks from now until Part II starts getting posted. And you won't have to wait so long for updates!

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you so much for reading this work! Hope you will check out part II. And remember, a little positive feedback never hurt anyone. I would love some love in the comments or just a kudos.
> 
> HUGE thanks to @Thorki_And_Other_Obsessions for beta reading this entire work (and the next). I hugely appreciate all the work you have put into proofreading and providing feedback. You are an amazing person and I love you!


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